Friday, August 15, 2014

Case Study No. 1511: "Librarians are hiding something"

Never forget ...
On the May 24, 2007 episode of the Colbert Report, Colbert interviewed Wikipedia co-founder Jimmy Wales. During the interview, he showed on the screen the statement "Librarians are hiding something" and asked Wales how he would stop or prevent vandalism to Wikipedia based on that statement.
Tags: Librarians Are Hiding Something
Added: 3 years ago
From: ComixLibrary
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Librarians work in libraries with books all day long, seven days a week, 365 days a year. It's no wonder they're so paranoid.

What Do Librarians Do?

They hide things.

"Librarians are hiding something."

What is that something, you ask? Probably Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Why are they hiding that particular book? because they don't want religious nutjobs taking them out and burning them, because Harry Potter frigging rules.

And they (librarians) rule the world. Really. I mean it.

They are the enemy of John Ashcroft. John Ashcroft is not IRTFW. Librarians are.

Who Can Become A Librarian?

Dorks, geeks, dweebs and the occasional milf.

What Education Does A Librarian Need?

MLS: Masters of Little Significance. Or maybe a Masters of Library Science. Don't forget the PhD in 19th century French history and JD (never passed the bar), and the MFA in creative writing. The MLS came after the realization hits that you are qualified for nothing but knowing obscure facts. And running the world.

What Special Equipment Do Librarians Need?

* The same stuff as James Bond, only ten times cooler
* Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, because they need to hide SOMETHING.

Where Do Librarians Work?

* The CIA

How Much Money Do Librarians Make?

Just enough to put them above the poverty line--and pay off the five advanced degrees earned prior to the MLS.

Life as a Librarian

Stress, nothing but stress

"Librarians are hiding something (TM)"
Copyright 2007 Stephen Colbert, All Rights Reserved. This catchphrase was coined on the March 26, 2007 edition of The Colbert Report.

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