Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Case Study No. 1521: Staff of the Skool House Library

American McGee's Alice Ep.3 - Library's are Scary.
This whole series is live, I'm just tired of putting it in the title.
Tags: FLuffee4thewin FLuffee 4the win American McGee's Alice ep3 creepy dolls doll game gameplay play gamer games player weed 420 yay
Added: 3 years ago
From: FLuffee4theWin
Views: 7,549


"American McGee's Alice" is a third-person action game with psychological horror elements released for PC on October 6, 2000. The game, developed by Rogue Entertainment and published by Electronic Arts, is an unauthorised sequel to Lewis Carroll's Alice novels. It was designed by American McGee and features music composed by Chris Vrenna.



Level 6: Skool Daze

The new Wonderland is composed of nine provinces. When Alice falls down the rabbit hole, she finds herself in the Village of the Doomed, the home of the Torch Gnomes. The Village of the Doomed is composed of a network of tunnels and caves, patrolled by the Queen of Hearts' card guards. Beyond the subterranean village is the Fortress of Doors, where the main attraction is a school of insane but harmless children. Within the school lies an ancient book of recipes for magic potions, as well as the ingredients for one concoction in particular which will be useful to Alice.

Jump from the wall to the open door in the Skool House. Go through the doors, ignoring any Insane Children you come across. Clear the entryway of enemies, then grab the Croquet Mallet. Once done, go through the double doors to the left of the fireplace and meet with the Troll Elder again. He'll explain that you need to retrieve the Book of Bizarre Things from the library so that he can look up the recipe for making you small.

Once done talking to him, clear out the Card Guards's, then proceed to the library, which on the second level of the entryway. The trick here is to find the four glowing blue books and touch them. Each one you touch will fly away and form a segment of a bridge leading to the Book of Bizarre Things. Find all the blue books, then reach the magical tome at the top of the library. You will have to fight many foes along the way.

Once you get the book, go back to the library floor to get the recipe and exit the level.



[ALICE enters the auditorium]
[ALICE descends the steps to the front of the auditorium, where the ELDER is waiting]
[two paintings of waterfalls hang over the stage]
[two trapdoors open on the stage and 2 weeping/laughing insane children rise into view]
ALICE: There's a bit more to do than you suggested, don't you think?
ELDER: No need for sarcasm. I admit, my memory's not what it was. But I'm here now. I'll try to amend its deficiencies.
[on the stage, another trap door opens and a third insane child appears]
ELDER: The library contains a recipe for the potion. Consult the Book of Bizarre Things. Oh, no... Run...
[camera shows Card Guards running into the auditorium]
[the ELDER disappears in a whirl of sparkles]

[when ALICE exits the auditorium]
[camera shows the ELDER materialize in the library]
[the ELDER walks to a shelf, gestures, and the shelf slides backwards, opening up a new passageway]

[after ALICE rides rotating platform to the second floor]
[camera zooms in on CHESHIRE Cat as it appears near a bookcase]
CHESHIRE: Steps to enlightment brighten the way; but the steps are steep. Take them one at a time.
[CHESHIRE Cat knocks over the bookcase, forming a ramp to the third floor]

[as ALICE is searching for the 4 glowing books]
CHESHIRE: Countless generations of termites would only digest a mere fraction of the volumes here; and they wouldn't be one wit wiser.

[as ALICE continues to search through the stacks for the glowing books]
CHESHIRE: Every picture tells a story. Sometimes we don't like the ending. Sometimes we don't understand it.

[after ALICE touches the 4th glowing book]
[camera shows the 4 floating books forming a path to a book in a niche]

[when ALICE climbs on the platform behind the book]
[ALICE stands behind the book and looks up at CHESHIRE Cat]
ALICE: There's no lock, but it won't open. It's stuck.
CHESHIRE: Treat it like a Chinese box or a stubborn lid. A tap in the right spot might do the trick.
[ALICE looks thoughtfully at the book, then pushes it to the very edge of the niche>]
[as the book rocks back and forth, ALICE gives the book a final kick so it falls to the floor far below and springs opens]
CHESHIRE(vo): You call that a tap? Fortunate I didn't suggest force. You might have pulverized it.
[the pages of the book turn to show a blurry picture of a mushroom]

[when ALICE approaches the open book on the floor]
ALICE: Mushrooms, poppies, sugar and spice. All those things are very nice. When combined the proper mixture makes a getting-small elixir. Hmm, I don't really like sweets.

Case Study No. 1520: Unnamed Female Librarian (goodsingerkaela3)

No description available.
Tags: Movie on 2010 06 16 at 16 49
Added: 2 years ago
From: goodsingerkaela3
Views: 48

[scene opens with two young girls sitting in a moving car, as they use the "pinch" effect on their webcam to distort their faces]
PATRON: Hello, ma'am!
PATRON: Do you have the book "Willy Wonka's Got a Zit?"
LIBRARIAN: Lemmee check!
[she turns, then immediately turns back]
LIBRARIAN: No, I'm sorry! We don't!
PATRON: I need that book! I need to bring it to school tomorrow!
LIBRARIAN: Well, you're gonna have to take something else!
PATRON: Well, I told my teacher that I would bring it so she could read it to the class!
LIBRARIAN: Well, that's your problem! You'll have to go find a different book at a different school!
PATRON: You're a librarian, you have to have the book "Willy Wonka's Got a Zit!"
LIBRARIAN: Some people don't have those!
PATRON: Well, you should! I'm leaving!
[she turns and "leaves"]
LIBRARIAN: I'm sorry, ma'am!

Case Study No. 1519: Louise

The Killing Kind (1973) Trailer
John Savage stars as a homicidal young man who has an oedipal relationship with his clingy mother (Ann Sothern) in this low-budget shocker from cult director Curtis Harrington.

The film is available on DVD from Dark Sky Films:
http://beta.darksky Store/ Detail.asp? ProdID=10070
Tags: Horror John Savage Ann Sothern Cindy Williams Luana Anders Ruth Roman Sue Bernard Marjorie Eaton Curtis Harrington Cult Movies Trailer
Added: 3 years ago
From: VinnieRattolle
Views: 2,190


"The Killing Kind"

Paroled from prison, sex offender Terry (John Savage of THE DEER HUNTER) returns to the Hollywood boarding house of his mother Thelma (screen legend Ann Sothern), a former dancer with unwholesome ideas about tender loving care.

Escaping Thelma's suffocating attentions by peeping on pretty tenant Lori (future LAVERNE AND SHIRLEY star Cindy Williams), Terry is unaware that he is being spied on by a neighbor (DEMENTIA 13's Luana Anders) who keeps a place in her own fantasies for someone of Terry's special talents.

Meanwhile, terrible things are happening to anyone who has ever done Terry wrong, from the judge who sentenced him (Ruth Roman, from STRANGERS ON A TRAIN), to the girl whose testimony put him behind bars (Sue Bernard, of FASTER, PUSSYCAT! KILL! KILL!).

This seldom seen sickie (Psychotronic Encyclopedia of Film) is the work of the late Curtis Harrington, director of such horror classics as NIGHT TIDE, GAMES, THE DEAD DON T DIE! and RUBY.

Long unavailable in any format with only a brief theatrical release, THE KILLING KIND makes its DVD debut in an uncut, uncensored collector's edition from Dark Sky Films.



The film is about is about a psychopathic young man, Terry Lambert (John Savage), who served two years in prison for his participation in a gang rape. Upon release, he returns to live with his mother, Thelma (Ann Sothern), in her boardinghouse.

Terry, lounging by the swimming pool one evening, is approached by next-door neighbor Louise (Luana Anders), an inebriated, sexually repressed, single librarian who has been watching him from her second story bedroom window. She begins talking, revealing how bored she is with her life: "I am surrounded by boredom. I work in a library, and I hate it!" She speaks of her "hallucinations, they're so real, about burning all the books." They laugh, and she leaps into the patio swing next to him, takes off her eyeglasses, and remarks "It must be wonderful."

Terry is unable to put the remark into any context until she adds, "Being raped!" She moves her glasses up and down his inner thigh, uttering, "I wouldn't have told on you."

He bounces off the swing and stands by the edge of the pool. She immediately follows him, challenging him to guess her age. He blurts out, "35," which is correct. She looks at him, responds in a hopeless voice, "Too old?" and runs away.

Louise returns to poolside the next day to apologize for her "childish" behavior. "I was drunk. I hope you don't think I was actually intending to se-, se-, seduce you." Louise's difficulty in saying "seduce" is indicative of her sexual problems.

Terry rebukes the apology, "The next time you're stoned lady ... and you don't actually know that you're horny ... why don't you just hop into a goddamn cold shower." Louise's anger is visibly apparent as he rebuffs her; as soon as Terry quiets down, she turns and leaves but immediately comes back to further frustrate him.

She thoroughly enjoys tormenting the young man; she speaks softly in a seductive bedroom voice. He attempts to ignore her until she remarks, "That thing [guitar] that you hold so close to you, like a woman. You can't even play it." Terry jumps to his feet and raises the guitar as if he is going to strike her. Fear engulfs her face, but he bashes the guitar on the edge of the pool and runs into the house. Louise's face of fear is slowly replaced by a self-satisfying smile, and in only seconds, her face beams with smugness, indicating that she enjoyed every moment of torment that she inflicted upon Terry.

Louise, an attractive mature blonde (full bang; bun at nape) appears in other scenes, always maintaining her image as a librarian. She professes to be a librarian and exhibits the visual characteristics throughout the film. Louise dresses colorfully but conservatively and wears eyeglasses in every scene.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Case Study No. 1518: Staff of Davis Library

How To Steal A Library Book
A short excerpt from Alvin Sloan's 1999 documentary short.
Tags: UNC Alvin Sloan STV comedy instructional steal theft library book
Added: 8 years ago
From: infinitewindow
Views: 42,452

[scene opens in a darkened room, where a library thief (wearing a fake mustache and playing with a butterfly knife) is being interrogated]
MAN: Okay, we know why you steal library books, now tell us how you steal them.
LIBRARY THIEF: How I steal library books? Okay, well, there are several steps ... Uh, step one.
["Step 1" appears on screen, then cut to the thief standing in the stacks of Davis Library (University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill), speaking directly to the camera]
LIBRARY THIEF: The first step is easy. Choosing which library books you wanna steal. For the purposes of this demonstration, we'll choose these two, right up here ...
[he uses the shelves like a stepladder, knocking over several books before grabbing the two he was pointing at]
LIBRARY THIEF: Step two is a little trickier ...
["Step 2" appears on screen, then cut to the thief standing in a private study room (the two books sitting on a table in front of him), speaking directly to the camera]
LIBRARY THIEF: So, you've found your books. What now? Well, first you've got to remove the small magnetic strip embedded in each book's spine that will trigger the alarm system if you remove it from the library.
[cut to various quick shots of the security gates set up around the library's various exits, then back to the thief]
LIBRARY THIEF: To do so, simply cut a small section of your book's spine out ...
[he takes out a switchblade, then cut to a closeup of one of the book's spines (with the title "Srpski jamb i narodna metrika"), as he cuts away a piece of the binding]
LIBRARY THIEF: Find the strip, and remove it. That's it! Now, step three.
[he tries to sit casually on the edge of the table, but ends up falling down]
["Step 3" appears on screen, then cut to the thief sitting in a chair, speaking directly to the camera]
LIBRARY THIEF: [whispers] Now, since most books are too bulky to be concealed in your shirt or pants, you need to find another place to hide them ...
[cut to a closeup of the floor, as he straps a book to the bottom of his shoe with duct tape]
[cut to his other shoe, as he repeats the process, then cut to a floor-level shot of the library, as he slowly walks towards the exit]
[cut to a shot of the thief shuffling towards the exit, trying to act casual and waving to someone off camera (as various students and staff can be seen milling about), then he makes his way past the security gate and out of the library]
[cut to an exterior shot of the Wake Forest-Rolesville Park, as the thief (still with the books strapped underneath his feet) uses the ruined books to jump up and down in a flower patch]
[cut back to the thief being interrogated]
LIBRARY THIEF: So anyway, that's how you steal a library book ...

Brought to you by UNC Student Television
Visit us at uncstv



From Episode 3 of UNC's "Center Ring", a show airing on the university's student-run television network. The episode was nominated for "Best Episode 2000" and won for "Best Editing 2000."
Original Airdate: September 27, 1999
Directed by Alvin Sloan. Producer, Rick Ward

Case Study No. 1517: Volteel Biblio

Let's play Megaman Zero 3 [Part 5] i better give volteel biblio my overdue book
yep my book is overdue and voteel biblio is pissed well his stage takes place in some sort of data library. i actully edited this video in camtasia studio editor and i can also record with it but i don't know how to record audio from the speakers with it.

Volteel Biblio: he will go off the screen and pop up in 1 of 4 holes shooting an electric ball and that all i know i usually kill him fast, he probably has another attack if you are S rank.

Tretista kelverian: this boss is huge and back in 2009 when i first played this game i had so much trouble with this boss because i didn't know how to upgrade my HP but anyways he throws a crate and dashes into it and throws an L shaped pipe, well i think it looks like an L and maybe that L could stand for Loser. and he shoots out purple power balls that land on the floor and move along and he releases 2 dogs that are attatched to him.

Cubit foxtar: he becomes flames and all the flames will spin around the area and it hard to avoid (goodluck Perfect run users) and he generates flames on him and they will cycle around the area or he will shoot off one by one and he will flip around. Part 5 enjoy!

don't forget to check out this group channle @ user/ thegreatLPers

you can also check out my channle for my favorite VGM @ user/ topVGML4good
Tags: Megaman Rockman Zero volteel biblio cubit foxtar walkthrough gaming videogames ???????3 Video Game Part (music) Nintendo Games Playing Book Music Let Gameplay Reborn Advance Books Rpg Stage Reading Free Theatre Gba Battle Trailer Olympic Games System Library Comic Writing
Added: 2 years ago
From: l4good
Views: 173

[scene opens with Zero inside the Command Room of the Resistance Base]
ROUGE: Your orders, please.
[the player selects "Select mission"]
ROUGE: Displaying the available missions ...
[the player selects "Area: Sunken Library"]
JAUNE: The ruins of an ancient library have been found. It's completely soaked inside, but there may still be some data around. We'd like you to search for data on Weil or Omega.
ROUGE: Do you accept?
[the player selects "Yes"]
JAUNE: Mission assigned ... All personnel, prepare to transfer.
[Zero steps onto the transportation platform]
JAUNE: Preparations for transfer complete. Transfer!
[Zero teleports]
CIEL: Don't do anything dangerous, Zero ...
[cut to the interior of the Sunken Library]
ROUGE: [over intercom] First, please go to the Data Room. That room has the highest probability of containing information about Weil and Omega.
["Mission Start" appears on screen, and Zero (after defeating several enemies) makes his way to the Data Room]
ROUGE: [over intercom] This is the Data Room. Please search for information on Weil at that console. After searching, the data's location will be displayed. Please go to that area, and recover the data.
[Zero walks up to the computer in the middle of the room, as "Push Up on Control Pad" appears on screen]
ZERO: Four matches ... Weil, Omega, Dark Elf, Elf Wars.
["Specify search data" appears on screen, and the player selects "Dr. Weil"]
COMPUTER: Area with Weil's data found. To search for more information, use the console again.
["Specify search data" appears on screen, and the player selects "Omega"]
COMPUTER: Area with Omega's data found. To search for more information, use the console again.
["Specify search data" appears on screen, and the player selects "Dark Elf"]
COMPUTER: Area with Dark Elf's data found. To search for more information, use the console again.
["Specify search data" appears on screen, and the player selects "Elf Wars"]
COMPUTER: Area with data concerning the Elf Wars found. To search for more information, use the console again.
[Zero leaves the room and (after defeating more enemies) finds a room with a data disk]
NARRATOR: You got the Elf Wars data!
ZERO: File #945388 (Elf Wars) ... end of the ... Wars ... Cyber-elves ... used ... from this ... Elf Wars ... the us ... "Dark Elf," and copies ... amplify the power ... while ... at will ... the worst ... in ... the war ... end ... Approximately 90 percent ... wiped ...
CIEL: [over intercom] Zero? It looks like that data is corrupt. I think we may be able to repair it at the base. Thank you ... Zero.
[Zero leaves, then enters another room and finds another data disk]
NARRATOR: You got Omega's data!
ZERO: File #815156 (Omega) ... The ultimate Reploid, created by Doctor Weil. Possesses incredible power when combined with the Dark Elf. Banished to outer space to avoid another Elf War.
[Zero finishes reading the file]
ZERO: If we can analyze this data, we might be able to find some new information about Omega.
[Zero leaves, then enters another room and finds another data disk]
NARRATOR: You got Weil's data!
ZERO: File #650326 (Dr. Weil) ... From Neo Arcadia ... Creator of Omega ... Altered the Mother Elf, sparking the Elf Wars ... Banished from Neo Arcadia after the Elf Wars.
[Zero finishes reading the file]
ZERO: If we can analyze this data, we might be able to find some new information about Weil.
[Zero leaves, then enters another room and finds another data disk]
NARRATOR: You got the Dark Elf data!
ZERO: File #351848 (Dark Elf) ... Officially known as the "Mother Elf." Creator unknown. This Cyber-elf was originally created for the purpose of restoring Maverick Programs to their original state. But the Mother Elf was altered by Doctor Weil so she could be used to manipulate Reploids, by freely rewriting programs. Although the organized fighting of the Reploids manipulated by the altered Mother Elf did end the wars, this terrible power was sealed off to prevent misuse.
[Zero finishes reading the file]
ZERO: So, the Dark Elf ... What's going on? If we can analyze this data, we might be able to find something new about her.
[suddenly, Volteel Biblio (in his humanoid form) teleports into the room]
VOLTEEL BIBLIO: Who dares intrude upon my territory?
[he notices Zero in the room]
VOLTEEL BIBLIO: Ze-Zero! Heheh! So, it's you! Heheh!
[he morphs into his battle form (a giant eel-like robot)]
VOLTEEL BIBLIO: I am Volteel Biblio, of Weil's Numbers. What is it you've got there? Give that data back! Nooowww!
["Warning" appears on screen, as the two battle, until Zero emerges victorious]
VOLTEEL BIBLIO: What's up with you! You're opposing Lord Weil?! Aren't you afraid of him?! You ... you're crazy! Aaaaaarrrggghhh!!!
[he explodes as Zero teleports away, then cut back to the Resistance Base]
ROUGE: Transferring ... Two ... One ...
[Zero materializes in the room]
JAUNE: Transfer complete.
CIEL: Zero ... Thank you. I'm analyzing all of the data you recovered for us. We may be able to figure out what Weil is attempting to do, by analyzing past data. I'll do my best.



DESCRIPTION: "The ruins of an ancient library have been found. It's
completely soaked inside, but there may still be some
data around.
We'd like you yo search for data on Weil or Omega."

Secret Disks:
-010 -016 -017 -018 -033
-043 -051 -094 -096 -125

-You will need to speak to the computer at the middle of the level
to find out the correct doors in the upcoming maze. Each incorrect
door you enter will deduct many points from your final score for
the stage. Keep in mind that the correct doors will always be in
the middle rows, since the computer always shows nine doors on the
screen at the same time (which means you have less doors to risk).
-Mysterious BGM... Sounds like out of a Resident Evil spinoff... =p
-The first half of the stage is set in a somewhat "wet" environment,
which gets periodically electrified. This can hurt you quite a bit,
so make sure you get to a safe place before the water reaches its

At the very beginning, destroy the spider and look for the
first turtle. Hit its head to make it turn over, then use your
buster to hit the next one and make it turn over too. Pogo jump
(or double dash jump) to a ledge overhead containing a big
Energy Refill and a Secret Disk (C125), then go back down and
continue. When you reach the next safe spot, wait until the
water lowers, turn the turtle over, (optionally) destroy the
oyster and pick up another Secret Disk (C051). Get out of the
small alchove (quick, the water may rise at any moment), turn
the next turtle over and make your way towards the next safe
spot. You'll soon see what the hell's going on with the water:
some loose ends of electricity cables are making the water a
giant conductor. Deal with the spider before continuing on, and
then keep charging your weapon between safe spots (there will
be a spider at each one). In the last bit of this section, kick
open the box for a Secret Disk (C043). Continue and grab the
Secret Disk out in the open (C033), then hit the turtle and
ride its backuntil the water's safe again. Quickly jump off and
continue; destroy the box for another Secret Disk (C094), then
dodge the oyster and jump to safety. At the peak of the area,
though, jump onto the ledge to grab yet another Secret Disk out
in the open (C096). Enter the miniboss doors to reach the
computer that indicates the middle of the stage.

Talk to the computer and choose in sequence each of the four
options it offers you. Take careful note of the door colors you
see on each screen (it's random, so I can't really help here).
Make sure you take note of every single detail in the doors you
are shown, since each wrong door deducts lots of points from
your final Stage Mission score (it helps having paper and pen
around, and writing down the colors of all nine doors shown
when you select each option). There are four door colors: red,
blue, green and yellow. After you're sure you got everything
written down to the last detail, exit the room and destroy the
little wide cannon enemies, then go underwater. Kill the first
piranha you see, and enter the exact doors pointed out by the
computer earlier. In each you will find a Secret Disk; don't
pick them up just yet. Figure out which room is which. These 4
rooms are as follows:
-One is a perfect square room with spikes on the ceiling.
Contains Secret Disk C017.
-One is a perfect square but has a small hole on the ground
(somewhat shaped after a T). Contains Secret Disk C018.
-One is shaped after a P, with a right side higher than the
left. Contains Secret Disk C016.
-One is a perfect square room with nothing special whatsoever
(this is the one you're looking for!). Contains the final
Secret Disk, C010.

Try your hardest to make the last one I mentioned also the last
one you enter, since that will significantly decrease the
difficulty level of the upcoming boss fight against Volteel
Biblio. After you collect all four Secret Disks, Volteel Biblio
shows his ugly face.

-Invisible Swim: He'll swim in and out of the
holes in the walls, ceiling and
floor. You can't damage him, but he
can't damage you either.
-Pop Out: He'll pop his head out of one of
the holes, and from another one,
his hads will pop out and throw a
(slow) electricity ball at you.
-Electricity Charge: He'll stand somewhere in
the room, grab the floor with his
long limbs, and charge the complete
building with electricity. Either
jump and manage to stay in the air,
or prepare to get pwned (well, not
really =p).
-Double Shot: He'll rise his long limbs and
shoot two shots out of each in a
diagonal pattern up and down. Jump
in the middle to avoid. This is his
EX Tech, in case you care. ;)
-Thunder Grab: He'll try to grab you and give
you an electricity shock. Move out
of the way to avoid damage.
I can't stand this guy. Why, you might ask.
Well, his laugh easily is the most annoying
and infurating thing I have ever heard in a
videogame. EVER. Oh well, at least I can kick
his ass to feel better. ^_^

Make sure you have your Ice chip equipped,
and ram him with all kinds of Ice attacks. EX
Techs work really well here too. Due to his
high vulnerability to Ice attakcs, his life
meter will decrease really fast if you keep
continuously punishing him with cool blows
(pun fully intended =p). He'll do his pop out
attack the most throughout the fight, so if
you can keep hitting him whenever he shows up
you'll have him beaten in no time.

Taking this guy's plugs out of the sockets earns you the
Shadow Dash Boot Chip: Equip it to dash right through enemies
without taking damage, it also makes Zero take the color of his
trails, maybe to indicate his status. If you also made him pay
the electricity bill with style, you'll also net the V-Shot EX
Technique: Equip the Thunder Chip to fire your buster in two
directions simultaneously (also applies to charged blasts).



Volteel Biblio is one of the bosses in "Mega Man Zero 3" for the Game Boy Advance. Volteel is a Reploid based on electric eels, and is one of the Eight Gentle Judges being brainwashed by Dr. Weil as one of "Weil's Numbers". Volteel's personality is somewhat eccentric, as to maintain his compressed form, he removed the protection of his power generator. The electromagnetic waves emitted by the generator caused damage to his brain, and he needs regular maintenance to avoid defects. When Zero goes to the ruins of an ancient library to search for Secret Disks about Weil, Omega, Dark Elf, and the Elf Wars (which was found corrupted) Volteel appears and fights against him to protect the data.

Nickname: Skilled Eel Lightning God (Nouman Raijin)
EX Skill: V Laser
Volteel Biblo repeatedly sends out two electric beams from his tails, angled like a V.

Mission: Retrieve Data File
Zero's EX Skill: V-Shot

Weakness: Ice
Main Stage: Sunken Library

Volteel attacks by releasing electric spheres from his tail, while hiding in holes. He will sometimes exit the holes to charge the entire room with electricity/attack with his tail and will also stretch out his two tails to attack. If the player has rank A or S, Volteel will use V Laser, in which he shoots two electric spheres from his tail. Defeating him gives Zero the "Shadow Dash" Foot Chip and, if at A or S rank, the V-Shot ability.

Case Study No. 1516: Unnamed Female Librarian (Changing Channels)

Jazz Librarian
A beatnik's spoken word about his love of a lady librarian.
Tags: comedy changing channels changingchannels poetry beatnik librarian
Added: 7 years ago
From: vandeansing
Views: 404

[scene opens with a beatnik (played by Jason Summers) smoking a cigarette as he walks up to a microphone while jazz music plays in the background]
BEATNIK: After four long weeks with my lady golfer friend, I was ready for a new release. I now know the meaning of love, her name is Librarian.
[a spotlight illuminates a young female librarian (played by Valerie Watkins) in the background, who looks up from her book and puts a finger to her lips]
BEATNIK: Ame on you! You know the rules! Librarians like it quiet!
[the librarian (hair in a bun, glasses, white blouse, brown skirt) walks up to him]
LIBRARIAN: There is no smoking in the library, sir.
BEATNIK: Okay ...
[she walks back into the background, and he takes one last drag of his cigarette before the scene fades to black]
[cut back to the microphone, as the beatnik again enters the scene (still smoking his cigarette)]
BEATNIK: I don't know if it was her thigh-high leggings, or the way she alphabetized, but I could tell our life story was about to come out in hardback ...
[the spotlight again illuminates the librarian in the background, as she again shushes him]
BEATNIK: Aka Khan! Let me rock you, Chaka Khan! Let me rock you 'cause I feel for you ...
[she walks up to him again]
BEATNIK: Can you tell me where I can find some magazines?
LIBRARIAN: Periodicals are minor league ... Look me up when you get to the pros!
[the scene again fades to black, then cut to the beatnik once more taking his place in front of the microphone]
BEATNIK: I've paid enough late fees in my life to realize this librarian was way overdue!
[the spotlight again illuminates the librarian, as she walks up to him and gets real close]
BEATNIK: Can you tell me where to find the section on love?
LIBRARIAN: You are standing in it!
[she walks off, beckoning him to follow]
BEATNIK: We spent the next two hours in the microfichs room, learning the ins and outs of what she called the "Do-Me Decimal System" ... She was hot!
[he takes another long drag on his cigarette]
BEATNIK: She was a librarian!
[he walks off in her direction, as the scene fades to black]



Changing Channels Goes for the American Dream
By John Stanton
Jun 15, 2001

The last time Changing Channels performed "The Big Show," the popular Wilmington comedy troupe nearly sold out Thalian Hall.

Now, nearly two years later, Changing Channels - which does a weekly comedy sketch show at downtown's City Stage - is pulling out all the stops again with "The Bigger Show: The American Dream."

"We left ourselves room for 'The Biggest Show,'" quips troupe member Jason Summers, shuffling through costumes and props in Changing Channels' new office downstairs from City Stage. Fellow Channels Chris Hendricks, Dean James, Opus Miller and Sam Robinson are here, as is the troupe's "receptionist," a blow-up doll named Miss Thing, who sits propped at a desk awaiting potential visitors.

The other three members of Changing Channels - Sandy Summers (Jason's wife), Val Watkins and Jef Pollack - aren't here for the interview, but they'll be at Thalian Thursday with bells on. (Or, in Mr. Pollack's case, with tighty-whiteys on; the long-haired comedian reveals his preference for briefs nearly every show.)

"It's gonna be a THING," states Chris Hendricks emphatically. "Not just another Thursday night."

Not only will Changing Channels be performing all-new and freshly rewritten material, but they'll also be employing the help of technicians from Studio FX to give the show added firepower. You can still expect to see audience favorites like Todd the Gay Vampire, Third Grade Drug Dealer and The Supermodel Family.

Monday, August 18, 2014

Case Study No. 1515: Malachia, Berenger, and Jorge de Borgos

A Medival Library
Tags: Middle Age Name Rose monks library
Added: 6 years ago
From: solix61
Views: 20,091

[scene opens with William of Baskerville and his apprentice Adso entering the scriptorium, as Malachia (the abbey's librarian) quickly locks a door upon hearing their approach]
WILLIAM: Ah, brother librarian. Perhaps you will permit us to examine the work of the two unfortunates that were so distressingly gathered unto God ...
MALACHIA: Your request is most unusual.
WILLIAM: As are the circumstances of their deaths.
[Malachia looks him over with disdain, then leads them towards one of the empty tables (situated amongst the monastic scribes copying manuscripts at their own desks)]
MALACHIA: Brother Adelmo sat there.
WILLIAM: Thank you.
[Berenger (the abbey's assistant librarian) looks on from the background, as William takes out his reading glasses to examine the illustrated manuscript on the desk]
[cut to a closeup of one of the monks, who whispers to his neighbor in Latin]
MONK 1: [translated] "Eyes of glass in twin hoops!"
[cut back to William (who stares at him through his thick glasses), causing the monk to hide behind his table ... he then returns his attention to the manuscript, describing the various images he sees to Adso]
WILLIAM: A donkey teaching the scriptures to the bishops ... Huh, the Pope is a fox. The abbot is a monkey. He really had a daring talent for comic images.
[the scene is suddenly disturbed as Berenger jumps up on a table and screams like a little girl at the sight of a mouse, causing the monks to burst out laughing ... however, their mirth is quickly cut short as an old blind man enters the room, smashing a clay pot with his cane and screaming in Latin]
JORGE DE BORGOS: [translated] A monk should not laugh! Only the fool lifts up his voice in laughter!
[Malachia takes the arm of the former librarian (in order to steady him), as he calmly addresses William in English]
JORGE DE BORGOS: I trust my words did not offend you, Brother William, but I heard a person's laughing at laughable things. You Franciscans, however, belong to an order where merriment is viewed with indulgence.
WILLIAM: Yes, it's true ... Saint Francis was much disposed to laughter.
[the old man gets an angry look on his face]
JORGE DE BORGOS: Laughter is a devillish wind, which deforms the lineaments of the face and makes men look like monkeys!
[William looks at the old man calmly (suppressing a smile)]
WILLIAM: Monkeys do not laugh. Laughter is particular to man.
JORGE DE BORGOS: As is sin! Christ never laughed ...
[he starts to walk away]
WILLIAM: Can we be so sure?
JORGE DE BORGOS: There is nothing in the Scriptures to say that he did!
WILLIAM: And there's nothing in the Scriptures to say that he did not ... Why, even the saints have been known to employ comedy, to ridicule the enemies of the faith. For example, when the pagans plunged Saint Maurus into the boiling water, he complained that his bath was too cold. The Sultan put his hand in, and scalded himself!
JORGE DE BORGOS: A saint immersed in boiling water does not play childish tricks! He restrains his cries and suffers for the truth!
WILLIAM: And yet, Aristotle devoted his second book of Poetics to comedy, as an instrument of truth ...
JORGE DE BORGOS: You have read this work?
WILLIAM: No, of course not. It's been lost for many centuries.
JORGE DE BORGOS: No it has not! It was never written! Because Providence doesn't want futile things glorified!
WILLIAM: Oh, that I must contest. I really--
[he bangs his cane on the floor]
JORGE DE BORGOS: Eh, enough! This abbey is overshadowed by grief! Yet you would intrude on our sorrow with idle banter!
[William bows his head]
WILLIAM: Forgive me, Venerable Jorge. My remarks were truly out of place.
[Malachia leads Jorge out of the room, as William turns and addresses one of the monks]
WILLIAM: Which was the Greek translator's desk?
[the monk points off camera]
MONK 2: This one.
[William and Adso walks towards the desk, but Berenger quickly beats them to it and loudly slams a pile of books onto it]
WILLIAM: Come, Adso ...
[they walk away without argument]




Annaud, Jean-Jacques (Director). The Name of the Rose. France: France 3 Cinema, 1986.

Starring: Volker Prechtel (Malachia, Head Librarian); Sean Connery (William of Baskerville); Christian Slater (Adso of Melk)

Original Title: Le nom de la rose

Based on the Novel: Eco, Umberto. The Name of the Rose. NY: Harcourt Brace & Co., 1984. [Note the librarian's name in the book is Malachi; that he is not Italian is an important fact.]

Access to knowledge is obstructed at every turn in this secluded medieval monastery where the library catalog lists books chronologically as acquired over the centuries (the librarians memorize it). Only the librarian and his assistant have access to the Aedificium's forbidden third floor. The library entrances are hidden or guarded, the floorplan is a labyrinth laced with booby traps, the classification system is a mystery, the signage incomprehensible, and death is literally by-the-book. Knowledge is dangerous and a threat to those who would turn their backs on God. Both in concept and setting, the library is the core of this storyline and an excellent metaphor for nearly everything academics choose it to be. But read the book to understand Eco's world of knowledge interruptus (which research shows might be the literary interpretation of Eco's personal frustrations with libraries and librarians).



The story takes place over the course of seven days in Northern Italy, during the early 14th Century A.D. Franciscan monk William of Baskerville and his Benedictine novice Adso of Melk (narrating as an old man) arrive at a Benedictine abbey where a mysterious death has occurred ahead of an important theological Church conference. William, known for his deductive and analytic mind, confronts the worried Abbot and gains permission to investigate the death of Adelmo, a young illuminator whose battered body was found underneath a tower window that cannot be opened. The abbott, Abo, communicates that the Benedictine monks of the abbey, unable to explain the circumstances of his death, are afraid that Adelmo was killed by the Devil. William soon deduces that Adelmo hurled himself out of a different window, and his body rolled down an incline, coming to rest beneath the window that could not open. The greater question was why Adelmo committed suicide.

The following day, the monks discover the body of Venantius, a Greek translator, suspended upside down in a vat of pig's blood. Venantius has a black stain on his right index finger and his tongue. William and Adso discover footprints in the snow leading to the vat, indicating that an unknown person carried Venantius away from the library and to the vat of pig's blood. William correctly deduces that this person was trying to divert attention from the fact that Venantius actually died in the library. William and Adso visit the library and try to look at Venantius's desk, but are stymied by Berenger, the assistant librarian who is known within the abbey to be a homosexual. They return that night and look at Venantius's desk. William finds notes in Greek from a book that Venantius was reading. Also on the parchment with these notes are secret instructions written in lemon juice, so they are invisible until heat is applied. The notes appear to be directions to something, but William cannot determine to what. Unknown to William and Adso, Berenger had returned to the library the same night to retrieve a book from Venantius's desk. Berenger creates a distraction, grabs the book (before William can look at it), and flees into the night. The following day, Berenger's body is found drowned in a vat of water. Like Venantius, he has a blackened finger and tongue.

William and Adso meet with the abbott to inform him of their investigations and conclusions. First, Adelmo learned about a book written in Greek hidden in the library that was forbidden from general use. Berenger, as the assistant librarian, gave Adelmo instructions about how to find the book in exchange for sexual favors. The instructions were enciphered on the parchment found on Venantius's desk in lemon juice. Adelmo was distraught after allowing Berenger to molest him. On his way to kill himself, he stumbled upon his friend, Venantius, and told Venantius about the forbidden book and gave him the parchment with instructions. Adelmo then killed himself. Meanwhile, Venantius got into the library and found the hidden book. He took it back to his desk and started to read it and take notes, but then died. Berenger found Venantius and dragged him to the vat in order to divert suspicion from himself and from the library. Berenger then stole the book while William was looking for it and tried to read it. He too was overcame with great pain and tried to take a soothing bath, but drowned. William tells the abbott that all three monks died trying to acquire a forbidden book written in Greek. The abbott learns that the Inquisition is coming to the abbey with the papal delegation and instructs William to cease his inquiries.

Undeterred, William and Adso discover a secret passage into the library and begin to explore it. They quickly realize it is not only an imposing library with many rare books, but is also structured as a labyrinthe, constructed on multiple levels in the abbey's forbidden principal tower. William is astonished to find that it is "one of the finest libraries in all Christendom", containing dozens of works by Classical masters such as Aristotle, thought to have been lost for centuries. William deduces that the library is kept hidden because such advanced knowledge, coming from pagan philosophers, is difficult to reconcile with Christianity. It becomes clear that the only remaining copy of Aristotle's Second Book of Poetics is somehow related to the deaths. William deduces that the book in Greek taken by Venantius from the library is Aristotle's book on Comedy.

While the debate and Inquisiatorial trial go on, William's investigations continue. Severinus, the abbey's herbalist and William's friend, finds the book in Greek, which was hidden by Berenger when he came to the herborium to take the bath that killed him. Severinus tells this to William, but is overheard by Malachia, the abbey's librarian. Malachia, under instructions from an unknown person, goes to the herborium and kills Severinus, bringing the death toll to four dead monks.

The next day, Malachia dies and is found with a blackened finger and tongue, bringing the death toll to five dead monks. William and Adso ascend the forbidden library, and come face to face with the Jorge de Borgos (Feodor Chaliapin, Jr.), the most ancient denizen of the abbey, and the former librarian. Throughout the film, Jorge and William engaged in intellectual debate about whether comedy and laughter should be banned by the church. In the final scene, Jorge explains that Aristotle's Second Book of Poetics, dedicated to comedy, would be disastorous because it might encourage learned men to laugh and jest. Jorge believes that laughter extinguishes fear of the Devil, without which there is no need for God. Believing laughter and jocularity to be instruments of the Devil, Jorge has poisoned the pages of the book with arsenic so anyone reading it would ingest the poison as they licked their fingers to aid in turning pages. Jorge, who is blind, gives the book to William, confident that the poison will kill him too. Unknown to Jorge is the fact that William (who correctly deduced that the black stain found on the finger and tongue of Venantius, Berenger, and Malachia came from touching poison) is wearing a glove. When he tells Jorge that the book will not kill him, Jorge throws over a candle, starting a blaze that quickly engulfs the library. William insists that Adso flee, as he manages to collect an inadequate armload of invaluable books to save; the volume of Poetics, Jorge, and the rest of the library are lost.



[William and Adso are searching under the abbey for a secret route to the library]
William of Baskerville: Those are the foundations of the tower. But how to reach the library?
[Adso screams when he sees a rat]
William of Baskerville: The rats love parchment even more than scholars do. Let's follow him ...
[they discover the secret entrance to the library]
William of Baskerville: 166. Bolted scriptorium door. 167, 168, 169, 170. ... 317, 318.... I knew it! Adso, I knew it! Adso, do you realize we're in one of the greatest libraries in the whole of Christendom?
[William shouts for joy]
Adso of Melk: How are we going to find the book we're looking for?
William of Baskerville: In time ... "The Beatus of Liebana". That, Adso, is a masterpiece. And this is the version annotated by Umberto de Bologna! How many more rooms? How many more books? No one should be forbidden to consult these books.
Adso of Melk: Perhaps they are thought to be too precious, too fragile.
William of Baskerville: No, it's not that, Adso. It's because they often contain a wisdom that is different from ours, and ideas that could encourage us to doubt the infallibility of the word of God.
[William has wandered off and Adso has become lost]
Adso of Melk: Master?
William of Baskerville: And doubt, Adso, is the enemy of faith.
Adso of Melk: Master? Master! Master, wait for me!
William of Baskerville: But I am waiting for you.
Adso of Melk: But I can hear you walking.
William of Baskerville: I'm not walking, Adso. I'm down here.
Adso of Melk: Is that you up there?
William of Baskerville: Where are you, boy?
Adso of Melk: I'm lost!
William of Baskerville: Well, Adso, it would appear that we're in a labyrinth. Are you still there?
Adso of Melk: Yes. How do we get out?
William of Baskerville: With some difficulty ... if it all. You see, Adso, that is the charm of a labyrinth. Adso, stay calm. Open a book, and read aloud. Leave the room you're in, keep turning left.
Adso of Melk: "Love does not originate as an illness but is transformed into it when it becomes obsessive thoughts. The Muslim theologian Ahmed Hasim states that the lovesick person does not want to be healed and that his amorous daydreams cause irregular breathing and quicken the pulse. He identifies amorous melancholia with lycanthropy, a disease that induces wolf-like behavior in its victims. The lover's outward appearance begins to change. Soon his eyesight fails, his lips shrivel, and his face becomes covered with pustules and scabs. Marks resembling the bites of a dog appear on his face, and he ends his days by prowling graveyards... at night, like a wolf."
[he stops and sees a man at the end of the hallway]
Adso of Melk: Master, I can see a lantern!
William of Baskerville: Don't move. Stay where you are.
Adso of Melk: I can see a man. He stopped.
William of Baskerville: What is he doing?
Adso of Melk: He's raising his lantern.
William of Baskerville: How many times?
Adso of Melk: Three times.
William of Baskerville: It is I. Raise your lantern.