Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Case Study No. 1581: Unnamed Male Librarian (Information Overload)

Information Overload: The Solution
Feeling a little Information overload? The librarian gives three rules for dealing with this problem.
Tags: xtranormal
Added: 2 years ago
From: alkeklibrary
Views: 123

[scene opens with a male student speaking with a male librarian (brown hair, glasses, mustache, suit and tie)]
STUDENT: I am feeling overwhelmed by too much information!
LIBRARIAN: Let's play a word-association game. Tell me your problem, and I will provide a solution.
STUDENT: "Lost."
LIBRARIAN: Context. Context makes information stop spinning around and get organized. You find it in reference sources like subject encyclopedias.
STUDENT: "Overwhelmed."
LIBRARIAN: Quality. Learn to find the best and most influential articles and books, and don't waste time with the rest.
STUDENT: "Unfocused."
LIBRARIAN: Narrow your ideas so it is manageable. Get into a small enough corner of the universe.
[cut to a closeup of the librarian]
LIBRARIAN: I will repeat ... Context, quality, focused idea.
STUDENT: Thanks. Where do I find more details on what you have suggested?
LIBRARIAN: Library research guides and tutorials located in the main library will help out. You can also contact us in several ways through the main library page for more help.
STUDENT: Thanks, your kung fu is the best!
LIBRARIAN: De nada, amigo!

Case Study No. 1580: "That library monitor over at the counter"

One ~To the Radiant Season~ (PC) Longplay - Part 26
Alright, this is my longplay of One ~To the Radiant Season~ (One: Kagayaku Kisetsu e) redone, since the original was recorded on a rather crappy PC...

About the game, ONE is an adult visual novel (Only the PlayStation port is for all ages) developed (and originally released) by Tactics for the PC on May 26, 1998 and later re-released as a full voice version on January 1, 2003 and on June 1, 2007 being compatible with Windows 2000, Windows XP and Windows Vista.

Kouhei spends the afternoon with Akane and Mio in the park and the next day he decides to go to the library with Misaki.
Tags: tactics nexton ~one kagayaku kisetsu e~ one to the radiant season longplay playthrough video game PC visual novel
Added: 4 years ago
From: LucasHidemiKomori
Views: 205

[scene opens on December 16th, as Kouhei is sitting in class]
KOUHEI: [to himself] The chime rings throughout the quiet classroom, announcing an uneventful (results aside) end to another day of exams. Slinging my empty bag over my back, I walk out into the corridor on my own.
[cut to the empty corridor outside of his class]
KOUHEI: [to himself] I walk down the corridor, still occupied with lingering memories of the exams. Further down the corridor, I catch sight of a familiar figure.
KOUHEI: Senpai.
[a young female student appears]
MISAKI: Ah, Kouhei-kun.
KOUHEI: [to himself] It's Misaki-senpai, whom I seem to be running into a lot lately ... Senpai turns to face me with her usual smile, and we exchange greetings.
KOUHEI: Are you going home now, Senpai?
MISAKI: Nope, I'm about to go to the library.
KOUHEI: [to himself] So saying, she shows me the book in her hands. It seems she's on her way to return it.
KOUHEI: This is ...
MISAKI: Yep, it's a book in Braille.
KOUHEI: [to himself] A book written in Braille for people who can't see.
KOUHEI: [pause] Senpai, you can read Braille?
[she smiles]
MISAKI: I couldn't until recently, but I've been picking it up lately.
KOUHEI: [to himself] "I studied really hard," she says with a faint smile.
KOUHEI: And now you're on your way to return that book?
MISAKI: Yep. The due date was last week.
KOUHEI: "Was"? ... You mean it's already passed?
KOUHEI: [to himself] She nods before adding, "Just by a little bit."
MISAKI: What about you, Kouhei-kun? What are you going to do?
[the player selects "I was on my way to the library too."]
KOUHEI: Because I've got nothing to do.
MISAKI: Don't you need to study for your exams tomorrow?
KOUHEI: In that case, how does "I'm going to the library to study" sound?
[she smiles]
MISAKI: Yes, that's good.
KOUHEI: [to himself] She nods cheerfully.
KOUHEI: Great. Let's go together, then.
KOUHEI: [to himself] And so, we set off in the direction of the library.
MISAKI: [pause] The library's this way.
KOUHEI: [to himself] Misaki-senpai points the opposite way down the corridor.
KOUHEI: [pause] It is?
MISAKI: Could it be that you've never been to the library?
KOUHEI: Now that you mention it ... no, not even once.
MISAKI: That's unusual.
KOUHEI: Yeah, maybe it is ...
MISAKI: It's this way. Come with me.
KOUHEI: [to himself] Senpai takes me by the hand and pulls me along.
[the screen goes black]
KOUHEI: I-is it really okay for us to be running like this?
MISAKI: I like to run.
KOUHEI: [to himself] She turns to smile at me before dashing off down the corridor ... "You wouldn't think that she was blind at all," I think while being pulled along by Senpai's hand. But the thing she's holding in her other hand is, without a doubt, a book in Braille.
[cut to another corridor]
MISAKI: Here it is.
KOUHEI: [to himself] Guided by Senpai, I arrive in front of a room decorated with a plate that reads "Library."
KOUHEI: So, this is the library ... I had no idea it was ten floors underground.
MISAKI: We're three floors above ground.
KOUHEI: And there's a secret door, too ... there's no way anyone would notice it.
MISAKI: There's no such thing.
KOUHEI: [pause] Shall we go inside?
[cut to inside of the library, as there are several tables and shelves filled with books]
KOUHEI: [to himself] Guided by Senpai, I step into the library for the first time ever.
KOUHEI: Wow, this place is pretty fancy.
KOUHEI: [to himself] I raise a cry of admiration at seeing our library for the first time.
KOUHEI: [to himself] I'm immediately bathed in accusing glares from the students who are busy reading.
[Misaki appears with a look of concern]
MISAKI: Keep quiet inside the library ... is what it says on the wall, right?
KOUHEI: [to himself] Misaki-senpai whispers in a voice only I can hear.
KOUHEI: Yeah, there's a sign like that ... in at least three places that I can see.
KOUHEI: [to himself] The notices are carefully written in an easy-to-read font with liberal use of red marker. Pasting a fake smile onto my face, I step inside ... "Suddenly, I get the feeling I'm not going to like the library," I whisper.
[she smiles]
MISAKI: Now now, that was your own fault, Kouhei-kun.
KOUHEI: [to himself] She admonishes me in a quiet voice.
MISAKI: After all, it is the exam period.
KOUHEI: [to himself] We continue our exchange while sitting down at a random desk.
MISAKI: Wait here for a second. I'm going to return this.
[she exits the scene]
KOUHEI: [to himself] Giving a little wave with the book in her hand, she heads for the returns counter.
KOUHEI: [to himself] Looking over, I can see Senpai speaking with one of the library monitors. Surely they won't be angry with her for being just one week late? ... Not that I'd know, since I've never borrowed anything.
KOUHEI: [to himself] "Are they acquaintances?", I wonder, leaning back in my chair ... Having finished their conversation, she comes jogging back to me.
MISAKI: Thanks for waiting.
KOUHEI: Were they angry with you?
MISAKI: Nope, not at all.
KOUHEI: Well, you were only late by a few days, right?
MISAKI: Yep ... but even they got angry that time I was half a year late.
KOUHEI: [to himself] She tilts her head while looking somewhat apologetic.
KOUHEI: Don't tell me you're a regular offender when it comes to late returns?
MISAKI: Yeah, maybe I am ... I always make sure to bring them to school before the return date, but I keep putting them in my desk and forgetting about them. I'm kind of forgetful, you see.
KOUHEI: You seem so level-headed, though.
[she gives a confused look]
KOUHEI: Yeah. How do I put this? ... There's this air of calmness about you.
KOUHEI: [to himself] At least as far as her appearance goes, I'd add.
MISAKI: Hmmm, I see. I had no idea.
KOUHEI: [to himself] She seems impressed.
[she continues to give a confused look]
KOUHEI: [to himself] "Come to think of it ... ", I ask, suddenly remembering.
KOUHEI: Do you know that library monitor over at the counter?
[she smiles]
MISAKI: Nope, she's a complete stranger. Although I might have at least passed her in the corridor before.
KOUHEI: Really? From the familiar way you were talking to each other, I thought you were acquaintances.
KOUHEI: [to himself] Senpai gently replies to my question.
[she smiles again]
MISAKI: It's because I can't see. The only way I can get to know someone well is by talking to them. By exchanging words with someone, I can understand them and have them understand me.
[she looks at him]
MISAKI: Because words are all that I have ...
KOUHEI: I see ...
[she smiles again]
MISAKI: But in the end, the most important reason is that I just like talking to people.
KOUHEI: [to himself] So saying, she narrows her eyes in a faint smile ... Her eyes may not be able to see, but they're kind.
MISAKI: Oh, I know. Tell me your address, Kouhei-kun.
KOUHEI: Hmn? What are you going to do with something like that?
MISAKI: I'm thinking of writing you a New Year's card.
KOUHEI: A New Year's card, huh ... So, it's that time of year already.
MISAKI: Yep. Not long to go now.
KOUHEI: [to himself] It might just be my imagination, but she looks a little sad as she speaks ...
[she smiles]
MISAKI: So, tell me your address.
[the player selects "Ask for her address too"]
KOUHEI: In that case, tell me your address too.
KOUHEI: [to himself] We exchange addresses before leaving the library.
[cut to an exterior shot of the library]
KOUHEI: [to himself] Leaving the school, I walk Senpai home (which is, of course, just across the road).
KOUHEI: See you later, Senpai.
[she smiles]
MISAKI: Bye-bye, Kouhei-kun.
KOUHEI: [to himself] She waves ... and with that final goodbye, she goes inside.
MISAKI: I'm really looking forward to your New Year's card.
KOUHEI: [to himself] I guess I'd better go home too ... Taking another look at the door of Senpai's house, I set off on the road home.



"One: Kagayaku Kisetsu e" (lit. "One ~To the Radiant Season~") is a Japanese adult visual novel, developed by Tactics, a brand of the joint company Nexton, and released on May 26, 1998 playable on the PC for Windows 95.

The gameplay in One follows a branching plot line which offers pre-determined scenarios with courses of interaction, and focuses on the appeal of the six female main characters by the player character. The game ranked several times in the national top 50 for best-selling PC games sold in Japan.

One is a romance visual novel in which the player assumes the role of Kohei Orihara. Its gameplay requires little player interaction as much of the game's duration is spent on reading the text that appears on the screen, which represents the story's narrative and dialogue. One follows a branching plot line with multiple endings, and depending on the decisions that the player makes during the game, the plot will progress in a specific direction.

The story takes place from November 30, 1998 through March 30, 1999, at a Japanese high school, and revolves around Kohei Orihara, a young man living a normal life.

Kohei Orihara (Voiced by: Kenji Nojima)
Kohei is a young man in his second-year in high school and the story's main protagonist. He lost his parents when he was very young, and is living at his aunt's house. He is a member of the light music club, but does not participate in club activities. He is always teasing his childhood friend, Mizuka Nagamori, and the new transfer student, Rumi Nanase, but deep down he is nice to girls. After his younger sister dies, he starts visiting the Eternal World, a mystical world parallel to the real world which is a major focus in the story. As time progresses, the people around him begin to slowly forget that he exists, and he starts trying to find someone to save his existence. He begins to confuse his childhood memories of his sister and Mizuka.

Misaki Kawana (Voiced by: Satsuki Yukino)
Misaki is an upperclassman of Kohei who lost her eyesight in an accident in elementary school. She meets Kohei on the roof of school during sunset. She has no caution toward those bearing the handicap of darkness and those who have blind reason, and she has a sociable personality where she can be unreserved with anyone. Her house is right in front of the school, so she can get to school even by herself. She used to play around in the high school even before she lost her eyesight, so she is used to it. She is a surprisingly big eater, and there is a scene where she eats several people's worth of curry at the cafeteria. She often shows up at the theater club to help her best friend Yukimi Miyama.

Case Study No. 1579: Bernard Chanticleer (library assistant)

Elizabeth Hartman - You're A Big Boy Now
Bernard Chanticleer's father gives him two simple words of advice: "Grow up." Bernard knows that his first step is to find a girl who's "willing," but he passes up a sure thing, Amy Partlett, for a more elusive goal. Her name is Barbara Darling, an inscrutable go-go dancer. More than a few obstacles keep Bernard from his dream world. There's his doting mother, who mails him locks of her hair and weeps at the thought of her baby as a man; there's a malicious rooster, trained to attack pretty girls, patrolling the halls of his New York City rooming house; and most of all, there's Barbara herself. She turns out to be a man hater, emotionally scarred by the lecherous wooden-legged hypnotherapist who "counseled" her in high school. All in all, Bernard finds himself in an improbable universe with a calculated clumsiness designed to evoke his confusing coming-of-age.
Tags: Elizabeth Hartman 1967 Go-Go Dancer You're a Big Bo Now New York Barbara Darling
Added: 2 years ago
From: ElizabethHartman043
Views: 1,808

[scene opens at a party, where male library assistant Bernard looks over at go-go dancer Barbara sitting at the bar]
BARBARA: C'mere ...
[he slowly walks over]
BARBARA: Who are you?
[he takes off his thick-rimmed glasses]
BERNARD: Yeah, who am I? I'm Bernard Chanticleer, Miss Darling ... Good evening.
BARBARA: Well, thank you ... Happy New Year to you, too.
[she gets up]
BARBARA: You were the one who sent that letter full of sugar to me?
BERNARD: Yeah, I--
[he suddenly stops and sneezes right in her face ... she gives no reaction, as he takes out a handkerchief and awkwardly dabs at her face]
BARBARA: [whispers] Bless you.
[cut to the two walking into Barbara's apartment]
BARBARA: Come on in, sugar ... Close the door.
[he smiles]
[he closes it, then takes out a cigarette and puts it in his mouth]
BARBARA: You like those coffin nails too much ... Better watch out.
[she walks over and calmly breaks the cigarette in two (leaving half dangling in his mouth), then walks over and looks at herself in a full-length mirror]
BARBARA: Better not pout ...
[she turns to him]
BARBARA: Take off your jacket. Relax.
[he starts taking off his jacket, but seemingly has trouble getting his arms out of the sleeves, so she walks up behind him and helps him take it off]
BARBARA: Would you like a drink? Coffee?
BERNARD: Coffee? N-no drink, maybe better coffee ... I mean a drink of coffee.
[he gets an embarrassed look on his face]
BARBARA: I know what's wrong with you ...
[she takes the jacket and throws it on a nearby chair]
BARBARA: You'd like a glass of milk ... but you're afraid to ask for it because Barbara will think you're a little boy.
[she leans seductively against the wall]
BARBARA: But it's alright ... You can ask Barbara for a glass of milk and, and she'll bring it to you.
[she walks towards him]
BARBARA: Go on, ask Barbara for a glass of milk ... Say "I want a glass of milk."
BERNARD: [whispers] I want a glass of milk.
[she laughs]
BARBARA: Y'see? See how easy, sunshine? Hm?
[she walks towards the kitchenette]
BARBARA: Now, Easter Bunny will pour you a little glass of milk, and we'll be warm and nice ... and you know what.
[she pulls down a curtain (so that Bernard can no longer see her in the kitchenette)]
BERNARD: I don't know what ...
[she peeks her head out]
BARBARA: What did you say, hon?
BERNARD: Nothing. Just agreeing ... I always agree.




Coppola, Francis Ford (Director). You're a Big Boy Now. United States: Seven Arts Pictures, 1966.

Starring: Peter Kastner (Bernard Chanticleer, Library Assistant); Rip Torn (I.H. Chanticleer, Curator of Incunabula); Geraldine Page (Margery Chanticleer)

Coppola's 1966 UCLA Film School Master's thesis is very much a period piece, with a harmonica score reminiscent of Midnight Cowboy. Despite an impressive roster of actors, the film has not aged well and the viewer is usually steeped in cinematic awfulness, but track it down for the many interesting library scenes. The male lead, Bernard, is a 19-year-old library assistant at the New York Public Library. We meet him in the opening scene retrieving books while flying through the stacks on roller skates, then he climbs into the book elevator (think big dumbwaiter) and rides down to the circulation desk where he's promptly scolded. The film is a coming-of-sex comedy-drama, with Bernard trying to find independence from his insufferably overbearing parents. Mother was hoping he would excel at the library, but concludes, "Besides developing unnatural skills on roller skates, you've been a complete failure." Mostly they try to keep him away from girls (although Mom should be watching hubby instead. Did I mention that Daddy works as the Curator of Incunabula? He has a really neat vault off his office that houses the good stuff, most visibly its erotica.). During one of Mom's weepy scenes, Dad indicates her hankie and says, "Margery, your lint is settling on the Gutenberg Bible." Near the end our thoroughly frustrated library assistant grabs that same bible from the vault ("To hell with your Gutenberg Bible! I hate your Gutenberg Bible!") and takes off running, leading a merry chase (picture A Mad Mad Mad (etc) World) out of the library, across a parade, through a department store ... you get the idea. The only thing that saves this film (besides seeing celebrities when they were young, including the introduction of Karen Black) are the luscious library interiors, and fortunately there are lots of them.



One of Francis Ford Coppola's earliest directorial efforts, "You're A Big Boy Now" (1966), follows the adventures of innocent 19-year-old Bernard Chanticleer (Peter Kastner), who is struggling to reach manhood and to attain freedom from his parents in New York City in the 1960s. Bernard works at the New York Public Library (NYPL) roller skating the closed stacks to retrieve books that are requested. His ineptitude and difficulties at work and with women provide many comedic scenes. Bernard and two other major male characters - I.H. Chanticleer (Rip Torn), Bernard's father and NYPL's curator of incunabula, and Raef del Grado (Tony Bill), Bernard's friend and fellow library assistant - provide unflattering images of male librarians.

The film features one female library assistant, Amy Partlett (Karen Black), who is interested in Bernard, but he is enamored with Barbara Darling (Elizabeth Hartman), a streetwise young lady who zestfully pulls, pushes, and plucks Bernard's heartstrings - a thoroughly enjoyable encounter for her. For example, she invites Bernard to move into her apartment, becomes infuriated with his behavior, kicks him out the same night, and then begs him to return as he trudges off, dragging his clothes down the street. As he endures this painful yo-yo relationship with Barbara, he fails to discern the true affection that Amy offers.

Library scenes are interspersed among Bernard's various adventures and are primarily comedic in nature. When Bernard's overbearing mother, Margery (Geraldine Page), visits NYPL to talk with her husban about their son, Chanticleer pulls out a mirror and trims his mustache while his wife assists Bernard with a new pair of contact lenses. The curator demonstrates similar vain behavior later in the film when he pulls out the mirror and combs his hair. Chanticleer is just as meticulous in the care of his highly prized acquisition, a Gutenberg Bible, which is placed on a dictionary stand in his office, a few feet from his desk, as he is with his own personal appearance. He is constantly lamenting about the "lint" that falls on the open Bible and is preoccupied with tenderly brushing the pages of the Bible to remove the airborne down.

Miss Nora Thing (Julie Harris), Bernard's landlady, visits the curator to discuss Bernard's aberrant behavior - staying out all night. She enters the rare book vault where Chanticleer is working and closes the door, locking the two in the vault. The sexually repressed Miss Thing is appalled at the artwork contained in the vault; she considers NYPL's prized incunabula to be obscene and promptly begins tossing items indiscriminately around the vault. When the time lock triggers, the vault door opens and Miss Thing immediately rushes out. Chanticleer, however, after spending several minutes attempting to save the collection from the rampaging Miss Thing, exits the vault a very harried, beleaguered librarian.

The resolution of Bernard's erring behavior is reminiscent of a Keystone Kops caper. All of the film's major characters are assembled in Chanticleer's office attempting to pull all of the loose ends of the story together (an impossibility) when a disgruntled Bernard suddenly grabs the Gutenberg Bible and runs out of the office with everybody in quick pursuit. What follows is a chase through the NYPL, out onto the city's streets, through a parading marching band, and into a department store with a maze of merchandise aisles. The chase in the maze finally ends when Barbara coldcocks Bernard with the leg of a mannequin. The film concludes as Amy bails Bernard out of jail, and the two of them (with Bernard's Old English Sheepdog) go happily skipping and running through the busy streets of New York City to the music of the Lovin' Spoonful.

Chanticleer as curator of incunabula is the supervisor of library assistants, indicating the possibility of nepotism in NYPL's hiring of Bernard. In his first office scene with his wife and son, Chanticleer establishes the film's story line. The curator indicates disappointment with Bernard's progress, stating, "You've been here a month and aside from developing unnatural skills on roller skates, you've been a complete failure. If your father wasn't what your father is, you'd been fired your first week here. Now, here it is, Big Boy. Straight and to the point. Grow up." As Bernard's mother insists he is "too young," Chanticleer informs Bernard that he is "going to live in your own apartment in the city paid for with your own money. What do yo usay to that?" "Terrific," responds Bernard, as his mother continues to weep, knowing that she is about to lose control of her little boy.



Bernard Chanticleer (Peter Kastner), a 19-year-old virgin, works as a roller-skating stack boy in the New York Public Library. His mother, Margery, dotes on him and tries to spoil him, while his father, I. H., the library's curator of rare books, is in a hurry to see his son grow up. Bernard, however, is happy only with his dog, Rover, whom he calls "Dog" against his parents' wishes. To become more independent Bernard moves into a roominghouse run by the eccentric Miss Thing, but opportunity for romance is restricted by a woman-hating rooster who guards the premises and refuses to allow any females to pass. One night Bernard goes to a Greenwich Village discotheque with two library employees: Raef, who has had considerable experience with sex and drugs, and the pretty Amy, who soon develops a crush on him. Bernard, however, is more captivated by Barbara Darling, an actress who works as the nightclub's go-go dancer. Having once been assaulted by a wooden-legged albino hypnotherapist, Barbara is a confirmed man-hater who occupies her time in a crazily decorated apartment dictating her memoirs to Richard Mudd, a dwarf. After sending Barbara a love letter, Bernard spends a disastrous night with her, and upon returning to her apartment the next day, he finds that Raef has moved in with her. Filled with despair, he goes to his father's office, steals the library's Gutenberg Bible, and runs into the street with nearly all involved in pursuit. Bernard is cornered in a department store and arrested, but Amy, accompanied by "Dog," brings him bail money and offers all her love. Revitalized, Bernard joins her in a carefree fling through Manhattan.

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Case Study No. 1578: "Courting the Librarian"

Courting the Librarian
This poem plays with both the language and the idea of the 'prim and proper' librarian.
Tags: Courting the Librarian
Added: 3 years ago
From: jbarrettwolf
Views: 29


Courting the Librarian

I want to read the poem you are.
Stroke your soft, hard paragraphs
Leave pundit's kisses, sharp, on your subject
Beneath your predicate
Split your infinitive
Draw panting breath
Inspired by your dangling participles
Creep softly around your adjectival phrase
And be consumed
By your free verse.


Case Study No. 1577: Mr. Mortman (Protocol Entertainment)

Goosebumps-The Girl who cried Monster
Here is the Episode, The girl who cried Monster, bout a girl trying to tell everyone tht her Librarian is a monster, i will be uploading more episodes
Tags: Monsters Bugs
Added: 3 years ago
From: darthfriend1203
Views: 79,075

[scene opens with Lucy scaring her little brother Randy with monster stories, as her mother tries to intervene]
MRS. DARK: Lucy, don't you have "Reading Rangers" at the library? Why don't you go and bother Mister Mortman for awhile?
[cut to Lucy in the public library, as she slides a copy of "Black Beauty" towards the older male librarian (balding, glasses, brown sweater, grey undershirt) at the front desk]
MR. MORTMAN: Well, what did you think?
LUCY: Two thumbs ... down.
MR. MORTMAN: But Lucy, "Black Beauty" is a classic.
LUCY: It would've been better if the horse had two heads, and big ol' gnarly fangs!
[he sighs]
MR. MORTMAN: Why don't you go pick another book?
[she goes and starts browsing through the stacks, as her friend Aaron joins her]
AARON: Hey Lucy, what're ya gettin'?
[she pulls a book off the shelf]
LUCY: "Frankenstein!"
AARON: Cool!
[she brings the book back to the librarian]
MR. MORTMAN: Are you sure, Lucy? "Frankenstein" is a classic as well.
LUCY: Yeah, but this one's got a monster!
AARON: Wouldn't it be cool if there were real monsters?
MR. MORTMAN: Well, I'm not so sure, Aaron. Most people like to be frightened in movies or stories ...
[he loudly stamps the book]
MR. MORTMAN: Not in real life.
[cut to Lucy and Aaron walking outside of the library]
LUCY: Aaron, you ever notice anything weird about Mortman? Like his creepy beady little eyes!
AARON: And his sweaty little hands!
LUCY: When he gave me my book, it was so slimy, I almost dropped it!
AARON: Yeah? Eech!
[she suddenly stops]
LUCY: Oh, my blades! I forgot 'em at the library.
AARON: Aw man, I gotta get home.
LUCY: Oh, no big deal. I'll see ya later.


[Lucy is able to sneak into the library through the front door after hours, as she finds her roller blades ... but then hears the librarian humming somewhere off camera]
LUCY: [whispers] Probably a classic ...
MR. MORTMAN: [from off camera] Oooh, it's time, my plump little beauties! My my, my little friends, I do believe we've put on a little weight.
[she slowly makes her way towards the voice to investigate, and finds Mister Mortman looking at a glass case full of spiders]
MR. MORTMAN: Coochie coochie coochie coochie? Don't be shy!
[he puts some crickets into the case, then gives a creepy laugh]
MR. MORTMAN: Ah, it's dinnertime, my furry friend! Oh, aren't you hungry? Munch munch!
[he grabs another handful of crickets]
MR. MORTMAN: Some crunchy crickets, my little friends!
[he starts eating the crickets himself, then suddenly transforms monster (with green bumpy skin and giant black eyes on stalks)]
[cut to a closeup of Lucy, as she quickly runs out of the library (the sound of Mister Mortman's laughter echoing behind her)]


[scene opens with Lucy back in the library during normal business hours, handing the copy of "Frankenstein" to the librarian (and determined to get proof about her latest monster story when her family refused to believe her)]
MR. MORTMAN: Didn't you think that the monster was the most sympathetic character in this story?
LUCY: Do you believe in monsters?
[he pauses, then takes off his glasses]
MR. MORTMAN: Perhaps we all have a little monster in us, Lucy ... Why don't you go pick another book while I tidy up?
LUCY: Okay.
MR. MORTMAN: I'll see you tomorrow, then.
LUCY: Yeah, right. See ya.
[he begins stacking books into neat piles on his desk, while Lucy pretends to exit the door but instead hides in the stacks]


[after hours, Mr. Mortman is once again feeding his spiders]
MR. MORTMAN: It's dinnertime, my furry friends! Don't forget to chew!
[he eats one of the crickets and once again transforms, as Lucy takes a camera out of her backpack]
MR. MORTMAN: My favorite!
[he begins to eat one of the spiders, as Lucy takes a picture (but forgets to turn the flash off)]
MR. MORTMAN: Who's there?
LUCY: [whispers] Stupid!
[she starts to run]
[he laughs menacingly]
MR. MORTMAN: Keep running, little one! I love fast food!
[cut to Lucy as she runs through the library]
MR. MORTMAN: [from off camera] My mouth is watering! Lucy, I know you're in there ...
[she stops behind one of the bookcases to catch her breath, but the librarian reaches through the shelf from the other side and tries to grab her, causing her to scream and drop her camera]
MR. MORTMAN: You're just making me hungrier, oh ho ho! Dinner is served!
[she ducks down and grabs the camera, then crawls in between his legs to get away]
MR. MORTMAN: Come back! Come back! Come back!
[he laughs again]
MR. MORTMAN: You can't get away from me, you little cricket!
[cut to Lucy as she bursts out of the front door and runs all the way back to her house]


[cut to Aaron in his room, talking to Lucy on the phone]
AARON: If Mortman's such a terrible monster, how'd you get away?
[cut to Lucy in her room]
LUCY: I think the flash blinded him ... but I got the picture, I got my proof!
[cut back to Aaron]
AARON: You're forgettin' something, Lucy ... Your library card has your address on it. Mortman knows where you live.
[cut back to Lucy]
LUCY: So what?
[cut back to Aaron]
AARON: He could be on his way to your house this minute!
[cut back to Lucy]
LUCY: That's not funny, Aaron.
[cut back to Aaron]
AARON: If I were you, I'd get outta there right now!
[cut to Lucy running down the stairs and opening the front door, only to find Mister Mortman (in human form) calmly standing right there behind the screen door]
MR. MORTMAN: Good evening, Lucy ... May I come in for a minute?
LUCY: No ...
[she quckly locks the screen door]
LUCY: My parents aren't home right now. I mean, they'll be home any minute! I mean, they're in the bathroom!
[she quickly turns and pretends to call for them]
LUCY: Mom? Is Dad still cleaning his rifle?
[he simply smiles]
MR. MORTMAN: It's okay, Lucy, it's really you that I've come to see ... You left your backpack at the library. I have it right here.
[he holds up the backpack, and Lucy gives a nervous laugh]
MR. MORTMAN: This is yours, isn't it?
LUCY: Could you maybe just leave it on the doorstep? Please?
MR. MORTMAN: Um, wouldn't it be easier if you open the door and let me hand it to you?
[she shakes her head]
MR. MORTMAN: I'll just set it down here.
LUCY: Thank you.
MR. MORTMAN: Oh, it's no trouble. It's on my way ...
[he turns to leave, then stops]
MR. MORTMAN: I look forward to our next little chat.


[cut to Lucy's parents pulling up in the driveway, as Lucy runs over to their car with the roll of film in hand]
LUCY: Dad! Mom! He was here! Mortman was here! We've gotta get this film developed right away! I took a picture that proves he's a monster!
MRS. DARK: Calm down, Lucy!
LUCY: He followed me home today!
MR. DARK: He followed you home? For no reason?
LUCY: Well, I forgot my knapsack in the library, and he brought it over, but--
MRS. DARK: Well, that was very nice of him. He lives all the way across town, it wasn't on his way at all!
LUCY: Come on, we're wasting time! The photo place is gonna close!
MR. DARK: Now Lucy--
LUCY: Please!
[cut to Lucy walking out of the Timberland Falls Photo Depot, as her little brother runs over to pester her]
RANDY: Let me see! Let me see!
[she opens the envelope and looks over the developed photos]
LUCY: I knew it!
[Randy reaches to grab the photos out of her hand]
LUCY: Let go ...
[he ends up knocking the photos out of her hands and onto the ground]
LUCY: Nice work!
[cut to their parents waiting in the car]
MR. DARK: Randy, get into the car please!
MRS. DARK: You heard your father ...
[Lucy bends down to pick up the photos, when Mister Mortman suddenly appears and snatches one of them away]
MR. MORTMAN: You're quite the photographer ...
LUCY: Mister Mortman, what're you doing here?
MR. MORTMAN: Have you been thinking about monsters again?
[her father waves to the librarian from the car]
MR. DARK: Mister Mortman, thanks very much for bringing home Lucy's backpack today.
MR. MORTMAN: Oh, uh, it was nothing. It was on my way.
MRS. DARK: Mister Mortman, why don't you come over for dinner tomorrow night?
MR. DARK: Lucy's been talking a great deal about you, it'd be nice to get to know you better.
MR. MORTMAN: Well, that would be lovely. Thank you ...
[he looks at Lucy]
MR. MORTMAN: It's been so long since I've had a home-cooked meal.
[he chuckles to himself, then turns and walks away]


[Lucy slaps one of her pictures down on the kitchen table (which just turns out to be of an empty library)]
LUCY: Don't you see he's a monster? The fact that he's not in this picture proves it!
MRS. DARK: I don't care if he's a drooling werewolf, he's coming for dinner!
[the doorbell rings]
MRS. DARK: Remember, your best behavior!
[she opens the door, as the librarian is standing there smiling]
MR. MORTMAN: This is very kind of you.
MRS. DARK: Oh, it's nothing. Our pleasure, really.
[he enters and addresses the children]
MR. MORTMAN: Good evening, Lucy ... Nice to see you again, young Randy. Will you be joining us for Reading Rangers next year?
[he cowers behind Lucy]
RANDY: Can I sleep on it?
[the adults laugh]
MR. MORTMAN: Of course ... My, what a lovely house.
MRS. DARK: Lucy, offer Mister Mortman a meatball.
[she cautiously hands him a meatball on a toothpick, which he takes and eats in one bite]
MR. MORTMAN: Mmm, delicious! What's for dinner?
MRS. DARK: Well, it was going to be a surprise, but ...
MR. DARK: Since you asked ... You are!
[he suddenly stops and clears his throat]
MR. MORTMAN: Excuse me, I thought you said--
[cut to a closeup of Lucy's mother, who suddenly has a pair of fangs]
MRS. DARK: That's right ...
[cut to a shot of Lucy's father (also bearing fans and hissing), then back to the mother]
MRS. DARK: You! You are!
[both of Lucy's parents transform into reptilian monsters and attack Mister Mortman, who starts screaming]
MR. MORTMAN: Ahh! Ahhhh!
[cut to the Darks (back in human form but still with their fangs) after the two have finished with their "meal"]
MR. DARK: That was a close call.
[she takes a napkin and dabs him on the corner of the mouth]
MRS. DARK: Ahh ...
[he calmly turns to the children]
MR. DARK: Now listen, both of you. You can never, ever let anyone know that we are monsters.
[cut to a closeup of Lucy (who is strangely calm after witnessing both her parent turns into monsters)]
LUCY: We know that.
MRS. DARK: And we can't have any other monsters in town, either.
MR. DARK: And do you know why?
LUCY: Because they might tell other people about us.
[the Darks' teeth revert to normal, as Randy (who had been frightened silly of monsters up to this point) is also unusually calm]
RANDY: And they'd be frightened, and they'd chase us away.
MR. DARK: Or worse ...
[he takes some breath freshener and sprays it into his wife's mouth]
MR. DARK: Mister Mortman's the first monster to come around in twenty years.
[Lucy smiles (somehow acting as if the revelation that she's a monster is no big deal)]
LUCY: Besides us, of course.
MRS. DARK: That's why it took us so long to believe you, Lucy.
[Mister Dark sits down and starts calmly reading the newspaper]
MR. DARK: And when you two get bigger, you're gonna get your training fangs.
MRS. DARK: That's right. Before long, you and Randy will be able to transform just like your father and me.



Season 1, Episode 4 ("The Girl Who Cried Monster")
Directed by John Bell
Written by Charles Lazer
Original air date: November 10, 1995

Lucy Dark (Deborah Scorsone) loves to trick her brother Randy (Christopher Tuah) into thinking monsters exist -- until she discovers the dark side of the town librarian (Eugene Lipinski) during closing time.
This episode is based on the novella, The Girl Who Cried Monster in the original Goosebumps series.

Novel/Television differences
* Lucy only makes two trips to the library, one of which is to take Mr. Mortman's picture.
* Mr. Mortman's monster form differs slightly from the book. Instead of a swollen, balloon-like head with needle-like teeth and bulging eyes, the librarian's head grows scabby, pulsating skin, his teeth turn green, and his eyes grow out on stalks like a slug.
* Mortman eats tarantulas and crickets rather than turtles and flies, since watching a man eating a live turtle was thought, too disturbing for a kids' show. He also never eats fish from an aquarium (although there are two aquariums in his office).
* Lucy's friend Aaron is black instead of white.
* Lucy escapes from Mortman at the library by crawling between his legs as he stands over her, rather than by knocking a card catalogue over.
* Mr. and Mrs. Dark transform into snakelike monsters rather than simply growing fangs.
* Mr. and Mrs. Dark are revealed to have suspected Mortman's true identity for some time prior to inviting him to dinner, rather than becoming convinced when Aaron corroborates Lucy's story.
* Aaron arrives immediately after Mortman is eaten, wearing a monster mask, causing the Darks to briefly mistake him for another monster (however he takes the mask off and Lucy's parents don't eat him).

Case Study No. 1576: Stu Cicero

Librarians in Comic Books... Stu Cicero!
From: She-Hulk (2004) #2
Tags: librarians comic books she hulk stu cicero marvel comics fantastic four
Added: 6 months ago
From: ComixLibrary
Views: 10

[the first panel shows Jessica Walters (in her non-She Hulk form) walking down a stairwell into a room filled with comic book racks (her though balloon reads "The 'long boxes'? What did he mean by that?"), as a young man (short brown hair, suit and tie) sits in a corner on the floor reading and eating a sandwich]
JESSICA: Hello? Is anybody down here?
STU: Blue blazes! It's you! It's really you! I mean, I knew you were coming to work here ... but wow! Jennifer Walters, a.k.a. the Sensational She-Hulk!
[the second panel shows Stu shaking her hand]
JESSICA: That's me.
STU: I'm Stu Cicero. Been a big fan. Ever since you joined the FF.
JESSICA: All right. Um ... Look. I was told you had legal documents down here. Case files. But all I see are comic books.
STU: Well, yeah. Marvel comics. Admissible in any court of law.
[the third panel shows Stu holding up a copy of "Fantastic Four"]
STU: Yeah. Most Marvel books are licensed from the real heroes. And any issue published before 2002 ...
[the fourth panel shows Jessica leafing through some of the comics, as Stu stands behind him]
STU: Bears the seal of the Comics Code of America.
JESSICA: I get it! Since they're a federal agency, that makes all of these legal documents.
STU: Yup. And in the burgeoning field of superhuman law, that makes them invaluable.



Goodman, Lieber, Kurtzberg & Holliway is a fictional law firm featured in the pages of the She-Hulk comic books - named after Marvel Founders Martin Goodman, Stan Lee, under his birth name Stanley Lieber, and Jack Kirby, using his birth name Jacob Kurtzberg - published by Marvel Comics. Created by Dan Slott, senior GLK&H law partner Holden Holliway first appeared in She-Hulk #1 (May 2004), where he hired the titular heroine to be a lawyer for his law firm, but as Jennifer Walters.

The main offices of the firm are in Timely Plaza (a reference to Timely Comics) in New York City, which, according to Dan Slott, is near the New York Supreme Court.

As a law firm specializing in superhuman law, they represent superhumans whenever they need any sort of legal help. These cases can run from libel lawsuits (such as the one launched by Spider-Man against J. Jonah Jameson in She-Hulk #4) to defending superheroes from damages (such as in She-Hulk #10, where The Constrictor sued Hercules for $168,000,000). Their legal cases also run into the outer-worldly territory, such as across time, space, and the mortal plane.

To help with legal precedents, actual Marvel Comics (especially those published with the approval of the Comics Code Authority) are routinely cited as legal documents. As a result, their library basement consists entirely of comic books, although they were forced to change over to trade paperbacks when the law offices were destroyed in She-Hulk #11 (March 2005).


Stu Cicero works in the law library basement. He was almost killed by Boomerang, but because of the shift from comics to trade paperbacks, they were thick enough to prevent a weaponized boomerang from stabbing him. He is also in possession of an official No-Prize from Marvel Comics. He was shot and appeared to be disintegrated by Arthur Zix in She-Hulk #10 (October 2006) upon discovering Zix' true identity. However, he had been merely teleported to Duckworld, pseudo-homeworld of Howard the Duck (She-Hulk v.2 #19).



Stu Cicero is a huge comic book fan, and has even won Marvel's prestigious No-Prize. Stu is an employee of Goodman, Lieber, Kurtzberg & Holliway and enjoys archiving the long boxes of vintage comics in the law firm's "Basement." He took a particular liking to She-Hulk and her comics, although they were never a couple, except being good friends. Stu was once trapped on Duckworld by Artie Zix (secretly the Recorder Zeta-9), but thanks to his extensive knowledge of Marvel comics along with the help of Duktor Strange, he was able to find his way back to Earth-616. Landing in the Florida Everglades (similar to Howard the Duck), Stu briefly had to deal with the Man-Thing before he was "saved" by Manny's friend, Richard Rory. Taking his jeep, he drove back to his firm to let his co-workers know that they were about to be attacked by an "evil robot", however he was too late, as they had already known Zix's secret, and him effectively leaving into the cosmos.



Powers: None

First Appearance: She-Hulk (2004) #2

Stu Cicero is a dedicated comics enthusiastic and was one of the comic book archivists working in "the Basement", the comic book reference library of Goodman, Lieber, Kurtzberg, & Holliway. GLK&H is the most prestigious law firm on the American east coast and has its own and fairly new superhuman law division. The Basement and its "Long Boxes" are located in their office building, Timely Plaza. GLK&H's extensive comics collection is invaluable to the firm, since most of the Marvel books they have there have been licensed by the heroes whose activities the comics depict, or the books bear the seal of the Comics Code of America, a federal agency, and thus are admissible in any court of law. Stu spent his days helping GLK&H's lawyers find reference material and reading comic books. One of his super-hero idols, She-Hulk, even came to work at GLK&H.

Eventually one of She-Hulk's enemies, Titania, attacked Timely Plaza, destroying the Long Boxes along with the rest of the building. She-Hulk took Stu in the local shop where, with the help of other comic book fans, they came up with a plan to defeat Titania.

Timely Plaza was rebuilt but most Long Boxes were switched over to trade paperback collections, which angered Stu. He had also lost a lot of weight during the rebuilding of Timely Plaza.

Stu eventually concluded the true identity of the mysterious Artie Zix, the new General Manager of GLK&H. Zix was truly a Rigellian Recorder robot RT-Z9, who Stu confronted in his office before revealing the secret to anyone else. Stu was suddenly shot with an advanced ray gun, leaving behind nothing but a smoking carpet.

Artie Zix then told the shape-shifter Ditto to impose as the missing head of the comic book reference library. Ditto was eventually uncovered by the Basement's Chas and Lewis, and Mr. Zix revealed he had only teleported Stu to another dimension known as Duckworld. RT-Z9 was unaware of a way out of Duckworld that Stu had learned from Marvel's black and white magazines. Stu looked Ducktor Strange in his hands and the mallard of myshtic artsh opened Stu a magic portal back to Earth. Stu appeared in the Nexus of All Realities in Florida and hurried back to New York to warn the others about RT-Z9. By the time Stu reached Timely Plaza, the robot posed no threat anymore and left.

Soon afterwards, Mallory Book replaced Holliway as the firm's senior partner and the firm likewise changed its name. After his time in Duckworld, his old work felt like more of the same to Stu. Luckily GLK&B's other senior partners, Mr. Lieber and Mr. Kurtzberg, used their connections to get Stu a writing job at Marvel Comics.

Monday, September 15, 2014

Case Study No. 1575: Hans-Jorg Tschirner

Agnes und seine Bruder (2004)
Pretty obvious eh?
Tags: Agnes und seine Bruder
Added: 6 years ago
From: lapinbored
Views: 22,078

[scene opens inside of a library, as the young male librarian (short brown hair, grey jacket, striped shirt, shoulder bag) walks past a row of computer terminals ("Katalogzentrum") and can't help noticing all of the good-looking women in revealing clothing sitting there]
[cut to a closeup of the librarian, as he nods at the women and smiles]
HANS-JORG: Hello ...
[cut to another shot of the camera panning across the young women seated at the computers, then back to the librarian]
HANS-JORG: Good day.
[none of the women smiles back, as another female patron (wearing a tight shirt and cargo jeans which reveal a tatoo on her lower back) walks in front of him]
[cut back to a shot of the librarian, as he looks away from the computer terminals long enough to notice another young woman (wearing a tight white t-shirt bearing her midriff and cutoff jeans) walking towards him and smiling ... he smiles back, but she walks right past him and hugs a younger man that was standing behind him]
[the librarian turns to look at them in disappointment ... but he continues walking forward, and ends up bumping into a male patron (nearly dropping his shoulder bag)]
PATRON: Watch where you're going!
HANS-JORG: Sorry ...
[he quickly walks away, but mumbles under his breath]
HANS-JORG: Asshole ...
[cut to another female patron (in a short white skirt) reaching for a book on the top shelf, when she looks over at something off camera and rolls her eyes]
[cut to the librarian at a nearby desk, as he quickly pretends to write something down (obviously having just been caught ogling at the woman) ... he picks up a stack of books and leans against the desk (still glancing in the direction of the woman)]
[cut back to the woman in the stacks, as the camera pans over to reveal two more scantily clad ladies in the stacks immediately behind her]
[cut to a closeup of the librarian's face (sweating profusely), as he puts the pen cap in his mouth]
[cut back to the two woman whispering to one another, as they suddenly turn and look at the librarian (snickering to each other)]
[cut back to the librarian, who quickly looks down at his books and scribbles some more notes ... but he can't help taking another quick glance in their direction (revealing even more young women sitting around in short skirts)]
[cut back to a closeup of the librarian, as he nervously clears his throat and looks at his watch]
[one of the young women gets up and starts walking in his direction, so the librarian (after taking a deep breath) gives a nervous smile as she walks past in slow motion]
HANS-JORG: Hello. Hi.
[she walks past without even acknowledging him, then cut to the librarian walking up the library staircase ... but he suddenly stops to stare up at the upper floor (as the camera cuts to three female patrons sitting with their legs spread, revealing their underwear under their skirts)]
[cut back to the librarian, who continues walking up the stairs and gives the women a quick smile and nod (but they just look at him with blank stares)]
[cut to the librarian walking through the stacks, when he notices the original blonde in the cutoff jeans sitting down and reading a book with her back to him]
[cut to a closeup of the librarian, as he pretends to be looking at one of the shelves]
[cut to the woman as she gets up and starts walking away, then takes a quick glance behind her (as the librarian quickly tries to hide behind the shelf so she doesn't notice he was staring at her)]



Agnes und seine Bruder (2004)
English title: Agnes and His Brothers

Stefan Arndt's drama focuses on three very different brothers, all searching for happiness.

Hans-Jorg Tschirner (Moritz Bleibtreu) is a sex addicted librarian, who is interested in young students.

Werner is a successful politician with a dysfunctional family.

Agnes, a transsexual, works as a table dancer in a nightclub.

The three brothers just have one thing in common: their longing for a happy life.



In writer-director Oskar Roehler's farce Agnes and His Brothers, Cologne is populated with freakishly exaggerated characters. As a horny librarian, Moritz Bleibtreu (Run Lola Run) wears unfortunate clothes and masturbates in the women's bathroom, newcomer Martin Weiss makes his screen debut as his fragile transsexual brother, and Herbert Knaup plays a conformist politician who takes dumps on his office floor and loves grilled sausages more than his tightlipped wife (Katja Rieman.)

Their stories are very loosely held together by a drunken ex-RAF father who never takes off his camoflage pants. The supporting cast consists of desperate butlers, flamboyant fashion stars, and porn actresses with hearts of gold. Roehler's parade of freaks and losers resembles the films of Todd Solondz (Happiness) or Ulrich Seidl (the Austrian director of the profoundly disturbing Hundstage), but neither Agnes nor her brothers ever feel real enough to truly shock.

There are a few moments when the peculiar combination of cliches pays off in sublime flashes of weirdness, but they are few and far between. When they're not having pitiful sex in convertibles, bleeding from botched sex-change operations, or getting chased by men with massive erections, Roehler's characters embarass themselves by vying for our sympathies. Agnes goes into the light, the librarian loser hooks up with the woman of his obscene dreams, and the suburban defacation artist finds hope in a field of mowed-down marijuana plants--in the end, every broken taboo is forgiven and melodrama wins out.



It's rarely a good idea to base a movie on a thesis instead of a story. Oskar Roehler's serio-comedy Agnes And His Brothers tries to make some incisive points about the damage wrought by society's sexual hang-ups, but though Roehler throws three different characters at the subject, only one halfway sticks. Martin Weiss fails to engage as a noble transsexual suffering bigotry, and Herbert Knaup fares little better as Weiss' older brother, an EU bureaucrat whose wife follows an elaborate bedtime ritual that doesn't include sex with her husband. Instead, Agnes And His Brothers lives and dies with Moritz Bleibtreu, the family's youngest, an archivist whose livelihood is threatened by his inability to stop spying on women in the library bathroom.

When Roehler yokes Agnes to Bleibtreu's point of view, the movie becomes as clammy and fidgety as it's intended to be. Roehler fills the frame with glimpses of women's bare hips, midriffs, and legs, and he fills the soundtrack with sensual pop music, capturing how the culture itself can drive sexually frustrated people crazy. But his insights don't dive much deeper. Aside from one well-observed scene where Knaup mistakenly thinks his wife is softening to his sexual advances because she laughs at one of his jokes, Agnes gets bogged down in silly shtick involving Knaup's son videotaping his dad defecating, and Bleibtreu trying to channel his sex addiction by becoming a porn star.

Left out of all the shenanigans? The character whose name gives the movie its title joke. Weiss gets to have a semi-sweet reunion with a former lover, but otherwise, he hangs around in the background, playing the neutered martyr. It says something about Roehler's vision for Agnes And His Brothers that he didn't think much about the movie's centerpiece character, beyond the simplistic irony of having the family transsexual be the most normal. It says that Roehler, for all his keen understanding of the dynamics of horniness, has no idea how to turn that understanding into a movie.