Rising Damp S02 E04: Moonlight And Roses Pt 1
Ruth falls in love and moves out.
Tags: Rising Damp S02 E04: Moonlight And Roses Pt
Added: 2 years ago
[Ruth Jones (an older woman) and her fiance Desmond (a smallish man wearing glasses) are standing outside the Victorian town house where she rents an apartment, as they embrace in the moonlight]
RUTH: I thought you were going ...
DESMOND: Oh, how can I go when you look so enchanting? You're like an English rose!
RUTH: Oh, Desmond ...
DESMOND: Oh Ruth, why do you exert this cruel power?
RUTH: I don't mean to be cruel ...
DESMOND: Just one kiss?
[she turns away]
RUTH: No, not here.
DESMOND: It's this place, isn't it? It's always the same!
RUTH: It's just that I feel these eyes watching me ...
[he looks around]
RUTH: You're not pressing against the doorbells again?
DESMOND: Just one more kiss, Ruth?
DESMOND: Oh, you look so beautiful when you're angry ...
RUTH: Oh, Desmond ...
DESMOND: You get these little lights in your eyes, like stars reflected in limpid green pools.
[she hugs him tighter]
RUTH: Oh, you say such beautiful things!
DESMOND: You inspire me!
RUTH: My eyes are just like anybody else's, really ...
DESMOND: Then why do they set my pulses racing?
RUTH: Desmond, please ...
DESMOND: Oh sorry, I can't help it. It's this damn moonlight! You're like an ivory statue ...
RUTH: Oh ...
DESMOND: Cold and unapproachable.
RUTH: Mmm ...
DESMOND: The beautiful brow, the proud arch of the neck ...
[he runs his hands over her face]
RUTH: Oh ...
[his hands move towards the chest area]
DESMOND: The, the superb ripeness ...
[cut to Alan (spying on the two with his binoculars) and Philip in their apartment]
ALAN: Just look at 'em! They can't keep their hands off each other!
PHILIP: Who is he?
ALAN: His name's Desmond.
ALAN: Yeah, he works in the library. Hangs about the poetry section all the time, he's got all the chat.
PHILIP: Mm, I wondered why she'd stopped coming up.
ALAN: Yeah, she's crazy about him ...
PHILIP: What's he look like?
ALAN: Not much, but he doesn't have to, does he? He's got the whole of the Oxford Book of English Verse behind him, all he's gotta do is recite a couple of stanzas and she's off! It's like, it's like giving her double vodkas!
PHILIP: How do you know?
ALAN: I've been listening!
PHILIP: Alan, how can you do it?
ALAN: It's easy, you just get behind the bushes in the front garden--
PHILIP: No, I mean spying on them like that!
ALAN: I'm not spying on them, I just happen to be interested in my fellow man ...
[Alan goes back to spying on the couple with his binoculars]
ALAN: Hey hey, c'mere c'mere c'mere! They're coming to the boil, heh heh ...
[Philip runs over]
ALAN: I must hear this ...
[cut back outside to Desmond embracing Ruth]
DESMOND: You're such a tantalizing creature! Why do you torment me?
RUTH: Oh ...
DESMOND: You ... you know what I want, Ruth.
RUTH: Yes Desmond, I think so.
DESMOND: I want to take you away from here!
[she gets a disappointed look on her face]
DESMOND: But you don't love me enough!
RUTH: Yes I do, I do!
DESMOND: No, not as much as I love you! Perhaps ... perhaps you don't think I'm being serious.
RUTH: I know you're being serious, Desmond, your knee's trembling again.
DESMOND: I'm sorry, I-I was forgetting myself ... I'd go to the ends of the earth for you!
RUTH: Oh ...
DESMOND: Brave any dangers, endure any hardships!
RUTH: Oh strong!
DESMOND: Oh Ruth ... Just one more kiss, before my bus comes.
RUTH: Alright, but be gentle with me.
DESMOND: Oh Ruth ...
RUTH: Oh Desmond ...
[they move in close, then cut back inside the apartment, as Philip walks away from the window]
PHILIP: Alan, we shouldn't be listening to this!
[Alan puts his hand to his chest and does an exaggerated impersonation of Desmond]
ALAN: Oh, it's this damn moonlight, Amanda! It's so cruelly deceptive ...
[he caresses Philip's face and starts singing]
ALAN: Younger than springtime! Are you gayer than laughter?
[Rigsby the landlord walks in behind them, as Alan (not noticing) continues singing]
ALAN: Are you a room with a view, and you, and no one--
[he turns and stops when he sees Rigsby]
RIGSBY: Room with a view, eh? You carry on like this, you'll get a room alright, but it won't have a view, it'll be made of rubber!
[Rigsby is moping around Ruth's apartment (knowing that she's going to move out once the marriage goes through), when Alan barges in and tries to convince him to rent it to a female friend of his]
RIGSBY: Does it not occur to you that this room means something to me? And I might wanna be left here alone with me memories, and think about what might've been?
ALAN: Well, there's no need for it to make you bitter, Rigs. There's plenty more pebbles on the beach ...
RIGBY: Plenty more ... My god, you're shallow, aren't you? Yes, that's you all over, you can't recognize the real thing when you see it! Plenty more pebbles ... You would've said that to Romeo and Juliet, you would!
[he mocks him in a high pitched voice]
RIGSBY: "It's alright Romeo, don't take the poison! Plenty more pebbles on the beach!"
ALAN: Well, I didn't know you felt so strongly about it.
RIGSBY: Yes, well I do, and I'll tell you this ... She hasn't gone yet! And until she does, I'm not giving in! And I'll tell you something else, you wait'll that Desmond turns up, I know exactly how to fix him--
[he turns as Desmond opens the front door]
DESMOND: Oh ... hello. I-I hope I'm not interrupting anything.
[Rigsby gives him a fake smile]
RIGSBY: No, no no. Come in.
ALAN: [nervously] Uh, Rigsby, about the room--
RIGSBY: I'll think about it, let ya know.
[he takes him by the arm and throws him out of the apartment]
DESMOND: You, uh, you must be Mister Rigsby ...
RIGSBY: That's right!
DESMOND: I, uh, came for the cases.
[he points to Ruth's luggage]
RIGSBY: Yes, they're over there!
DESMOND: I hope you don't mind ...
RIGSBY: No, mind? Why should I mind?
DESMOND: Well, I had the impression ... just an impression, that you didn't approve of me.
RIGSBY: No no, of course not! Whatever gave you that idea? No no no no, as a matter of fact, I'm delighted ... We all are! Just glad to know she's finally managed it!
DESMOND: Managed it?
RIGSBY: Well, managed to hook some stupi ... Uh, get on with someone! Yeah, we shall all come to the wedding, of course!
DESMOND: Oh, that's splendid!
[he picks up the luggage and turns to leave]
RIGSBY: Yes, mind you, we shant believe it until we actually see it!
[Rigsby chuckles to himself]
RIGSBY: Oh, just my little joke, y'know ... Y'know, it's not the first time for Miss Jones, she's had so many disappointments. Something always seems to go wrong.
DESMOND: Yes, well, it won't this time, Mister Rigsby!
[he turns for the door]
RIGSBY: Yes yes, well, it's all in the stars, I suppose.
DESMOND: Yes ...
RIGSBY: Yes ... What, uh, what star were you born under, Mister--
DESMOND: Oh, I'm a Virgo.
RIGSBY: [pause] Yes, I thought you might be. Well, never mind. I'm a Libra myself ...
DESMOND: Oh, yes?
RIGSBY: Yes, yes.
DESMOND: Well, I'd better be making tracks.
[he heads for the doorway]
RIGSBY: Yes yes, off you go. Yes, funny you going for a Virgo.
RIGSBY: Still, if you don't mind the drinking ...
[he stops and turns around]
[Rigsby sits down and feigns ignorance]
DESMOND: What drinking?
RIGSBY: What? Oh, didn't you know about that?
DESMOND: I ... I haven't noticed the drinking.
RIGSBY: Oh no, you wouldn't, not unless she gets violent.
[he sits down next to Rigsby]
DESMOND: Does she get violent?
RIGSBY: Oh no, very very rarely. No, but you gotta watch out for the signs ... Y'know, the level starts to drop in the decanter, the faint whiff of peppermint on the breath, and the clink of her hip flask.
DESMOND: I mean, mother doesn't approve of drinking and ... Well, we're going there tonight!
RIGSBY: Oh well, take my tip ... Keep her well away from the sherry trifle! Don't, don't want her sliding gracefully under the table, do we?
DESMOND: Does she, does she do that?
RIGSBY: Well, only at Christmas ...
DESMOND: Oh, yes ... Why does she drink?
RIGSBY: Oh yes, very sad story. Apparently, she's afraid of men!
DESMOND: I didn't know that!
RIGSBY: Yes yes yes, all happened years ago when she was very young. Yeah, apparently she saw something nasty in the woodshed. See, that's why she always carries a knitting needle in her handbag!
DESMOND: Good heavens!
RIGSBY: Yes, still, that's not gonna happen to you, is it?
DESMOND: Oh no, no ... no.
RIGSBY: Yes, mind you, marriage is a bit of a gamble, isn't it?
DESMOND: [quietly] Yes.
RIGSBY: Mate of mine married a woman like that ... Honeymoon was a disaster.
DESMOND: Why, what happened?
RIGSBY: She jumped off the balcony on her wedding night.
DESMOND: What on earth for? I mean, what did he do?
RIGSBY: Oh, him? Oh, he didn't do anything, no. He was, he wasn't even there, he was in the bar having a last drink. Yeah ... Actually saw her go past the window. Yeah, she went over the legging plaster.
DESMOND: Good heavens, how dreadful!
DESMOND: You don't think Miss Jones would do anything like that?
RIGSBY: No no, of course ... What floor are you on?
[Desmond gives a frightened look]
RIGSBY: Mind you, it is a bit worrying, isn't it? Being a librarian? I mean, you don't want her dashing into the reading room, all ...
[he waves his finger over his lips, making crazy noises]
RIGSBY: Pulling the books off the shelves, do you?
[he starts hyperventilating, then gets up]
DESMOND: Excuse me!
RIGSBY: Where are you going?
DESMOND: [nervously] Uh, I've just remembered something ...
RIGSBY: Well, what about the cases?
DESMOND: No, I shall have to leave them, I--
[Ruth walks into the room and smiles at him]
[he backs away]
RUTH: What's the matter, petal?
[she reaches out to him, but he backs away stammering]
DESMOND: I'm sorry, uh ... The flat's been taken! We-we'll have to call it off for the time being!
DESMOND: I'm awfully sorry! Excuse me, I must go! I, I ... I left the tap running!
[he rushes out of the room]
[she turns to Mister Rigsby]
RUTH: What's the matter with him, Mister Rigsby? Why is he acting so strangely?
RIGSBY: No idea! He's been like that ever since he arrived, Miss Jones! A very strange character, if you don't mind my saying so ... I think you, I think you've had a very narrow escape there!
[she turns and runs off after him]
[he chuckles to himself]
RIGSBY: Course, true love never runs smooth ...
[Ruth returns heart-broken, and Rigsby tries to sweet-talk her]
RIGSBY: He's been leading you on!
RUTH: [quietly] Yes, I suppose he has ...
RIGSBY: Well look, I'm not a great one for talk, as you know Miss Jones, but ... there are just three little words I'd like to say to you.
RUTH: What's that, Mister Rigsby?
[he tries to spit out "I love you," when Desmond returns]
DESMOND: Oh Ruth!
RUTH: Oh Desmond!
RIGSBY: Oh hell ...
[she gets up and embraces him]
DESMOND: Can you ever forgive me?
RUTH: I thought you'd gone for good!
DESMOND: No, I couldn't! I love you, Ruth! I don't care what the world thinks, I ... I don't care how much you drink! You can drink barrels for all I care!
[she gets a confused look on her face]
DESMOND: Well, I ... I've been thinking it over.
[Rigsby gets up and starts to slowly make his way towards the door]
DESMOND: I'll help you! I mean, it's a sickness, really! Nothing to be ashamed of! Don't worry, we'll face the problem together! Yes, we'll get the very best doctors--
RUTH: Oh Desmond, what on earth are you talking about?
DESMOND: Well, Mister Rigsby here told me all about it ...
[he slowly slinks his way past them]
RIGSBY: [quietly] Excuse me ...
DESMOND: There's nothing to be afraid of, you can put away the knitting needles, we'll face the problem together!
[Ruth looks over Desmond's shoulder at the retreating Rigsby]
RUTH: Mister Rigsby!
[even though he was out the door, he opens it back up and comes into the room (giving her a nervous laugh)]
RIGSBY: Eh, Miss Jones?
This is a list of episodes of "Rising Damp", all written by Eric Chappell. Rising Damp was a British sitcom starring Leonard Rossiter as landlord Rigsby and Richard Beckinsale (Alan), Frances de la Tour (Miss Jones), and Don Warrington (Philip) as his tenants. It was broadcast on ITV between 1974 and 1978.
Series 2: 1975
Episode 11: "Moonlight And Roses"
28 November 1975
Rigsby tries to stop the love of his life, Ms. Jones, from leaving Bleak House for a poetic librarian.
Moonlight And Roses
Leonard Rossiter, Richard Beckinsale,
Frances de la Tour, Don Warrington.
With: Gay Rose as Brenda; Robin Parkinson as Desmond.
Original Broadcast Date:
Friday 28th November 1975, 7.30pm, ITV.
- Ruth is at the front door, locked in a passionate embrace with Desmond, her fiance. He works in the poetry section at the local library and is busy trying some on her.
- Alan is in his room, watching them through binoculars, until Rigsby enters. He is looking for Ruth and remarks on her recent change of mood - now much happier and content - and Rigsby is convinced she has finally fallen for him. As Philip pours him a cup of tea, Rigsby catches sight of Ruth and Desmond out of the window and sets off downstairs, ready for a fight.
- Alan and Philip try to change his mind on the stairs by saying his name is Desmond, and making out that he is probably gay and is therefore not a threat to Miss Jones. Just then, Miss Jones appears on the landing, walking on air and singing a romantic song. Rigsby reverts to Plan A and his mission to 'sort out' Desmond.
- Next night, Alan is watching Ruth and Desmond again, when he notices her beau has gone down on one knee and proposes to her. - Within minutes, she is in the boys' room, showing off her engagement ring. They decide not to tell Rigsby as he enters and Ruth leaves. He tells Alan and Philip what he is going to do to Desmond, namely - to give him a fat lip. They suggest Rigsby should express his love for Ruth, by saying 'the three little words', but Rigsby can't even bring himself to say them in front of Alan and Philip. Alan suggests he should recite some poetry, but Rigsby is only versed in 'The Charge Of The Light Brigade'. Philip gives him a few phrases to try. They are the same phrases he and Alan have overheard Desmond uttering.
- Rigsby enters Miss Jones' room later with a bunch of flowers, freshly picked from the park. Her room is already filled with flowers - from Desmond. He tries the phrases on her, but they sound too familiar, and she accuses Rigsby of being a voyeur.
- Next morning, Rigsby enters Ruth's room to apologise, but finds her things are packed. Alan follows him in and untactfully asks him if a friend of his can have the room. Rigsby is determined to make one final effort to hang onto Miss Jones. Just then, Desmond arrives to pick up Ruth's cases. Rigsby throws Alan out and sets about telling Desmond about Ruth's 'excessive drinking' and 'erratic behaviour', and what might happen if she 'went into his library and started pulling all the books off the shelves in a drunken rage', etc., etc. Desmond, suitably shocked, runs out of the house.
- That afternoon, Alan brings his friend Brenda in to look at the room. As he goes off to put the kettle on, Rigsby enters and introduces himself. Taken in by her buxom figure and youth, he welcomes her with open arms - almost literally. They are sharing a joke when Ruth returns, unable to find Desmond. Ruth is visibly upset and, after Brenda leaves, Rigsby tries his chance at saying 'the three little words', but Desmond appears before he can do so. Overcome with love for her, Desmond tells Ruth they will conquer her 'drink problem' together. Puzzled, Ruth wants an explanation, but Rigsby tries to back out of the room unnoticed.
- The next day, Alan and Philip are feeling sorry for Rigsby, saying he will need time to get over the loss of his love. But Rigsby is busy moving in on Brenda downstairs. He is interested to learn she is a model. He is even more interested when she tells him she is an artists' nude model at the local college. Rigsby suddenly declares his hobby is painting.
- Meanwhile, Ruth has returned briefly to say goodbye to Alan and Philip, but not Rigsby, after he embarrassed her earlier. They get her to change her mind, so she goes down to his room.
- She hears his voice coming from her old room, however, and enters to find him chatting up Brenda with the same phrases Desmond used on her. Outraged, she chases him out of the room and down the stairs.