Book Staxx
4:14
Jacob Strassman and Matt Moline's entry in the 2008-09 UMD Library Student Video Contest - won in all three categories: Best Video, Best Promotional Video, and Best Instructional Video.
Tags: libraries library rap humor umd duluth college
Added: 3 years ago
From: umdlibraryduluth
Views: 4,934
"Book Staxx"
U Crew
Vasoline and a Shoehorn
[scene opens with a young man sleeping in bed, as his alarm clock hits "2:00" and the music starts as he wakes up (putting on a backwards baseball cap as he begins rapping)]
JAKE: Was a late night, woke up at two! Had a fifteen-page payp' that was overdue!
[he holds up a notepad which reads "Research paper due, 15 pages!!!", then cut to Jake sitting at his computer]
JAKE: I was stressin', man! I was on the brink! But I finished, pressed "Print" ...
[he hits the "Enter" key]
JAKE: Sh[beep], out of ink!
["Out of ink!!!" appears on the computer screen, then cut to Jake speaking into his cellphone]
JAKE: Call up my friend, asked what do I do? Should I tell my prof that I got the flu?
[cut to Jake's friend speaking into his cell phone]
MATT: Got your back, man! Yo, you're in luck! At the library, you can print that for just a buck!
[cut to Jake standing in the library, wearing headphones]
CHORUS: Got stacks and stacks and stacks of books!
[cut to Jake walking through the stacks]
CHORUS: Four floors!
[cut to Jake standing in front of the library's elevator (which has gold-tinted doors)]
CHORUS: Gold doors!
[cut to Jake walking through the stacks]
CHORUS: Got stacks and stacks and stacks of books! Book stacks! No snacks!
[cut to Jake holding up four fingers]
JAKE: Four floors!
[cut to Jake pointing at the elevator doors]
JAKE: Gold doors!
[cut to Jake doing the "making it rain" hand gesture]
JAKE: Book stacks!
[cut to Jake doing the "throat rip" hand gesture]
JAKE: No snacks!
[cut to Jake walking up the stairs]
JAKE: Four floors!
[cut to Jake pointing at his gold-plated wrist bracelets]
JAKE: Gold doors!
[cut to Jake carrying a large stack of books through the stacks]
JAKE: Book stacks!
[cut to Jake making the "throat rip" hand gesture]
JAKE: No snacks!
[cut to Jake sitting at a desk, reading a book]
JAKE: Chillin' at the table! Readin' in the back! Ladies walkin' by! Checkin' out my stack!
[he points at the stack of books on the table next to him, as a young female patron walks by]
GIRL: Wow, he must be smart! Look at all he's read!
JAKE: Don't know 'bout my brain, but they right about my head!
[cut to Jake walking through the stacks]
JAKE: Nuff with the girls, gotta get on track! So I can pass class, and be the biggest mack! I can't find my books that I need for my test!
[cut to Jake standing next to the reference desk, as an older male librarian is typing at his computer]
JAKE: So I holla over at that reference desk!
[cut to Jake standing in the stacks]
JAKE: I asked the librarian, she said "Listen!"
[cut to Jake pointing at the spine label on one of the books on the shelf]
JAKE: "It's time that you learned the Dewey Decimal System!"
[cut to Jake walking through the stacks]
JAKE: She layed down some knowledge, and I went to the shelf! The book pretty much ...
[one of the books "jumps" off the shelf (i.e. some unseen person on the other side of the shelf pushed it out) and lands right in Jake's hand]
JAKE: Found itself!
[cut to Jake exiting the stacks area]
JAKE: Snatch up the book and I head on my route!
[cut to Jake standing in front of the checkout desk, as a couple of female librarians are working there]
JAKE: At the front counter, they be checkin' me out!
[cut to a closeup of one of the librarians scanning his library card]
JAKE: Girl swipes my card, it was pretty hot!
[cut to Jake placing his book in the "Book Return" slot]
JAKE: One month later, I hit that return slot!
[cut to various shots of Jake walking around the library]
CHORUS: Got stacks and stacks and stacks of books! Four floors! Gold doors! Got stacks and stacks and stacks of books! Book stacks! No snacks!
JAKE: Four floors! Gold doors! Book stacks! No snacks!
[cut to Jake walking down the stairs]
JAKE: Four floors!
[cut to Jake standing on a step stool]
JAKE: Gold doors!
[cut to Jake walking through the stacks]
JAKE: Book stacks!
[cut to Jake making the "throat rip" hand gesture]
CHORUS: No snacks!
[cut to Jake exiting the elevator]
JAKE: Cruisin', up to the fourth floor! My class crew supposed to meet me at the door!
[cut to Jake entering a room]
JAKE: Of our private room! We reserved online! You can chill there for hours at a time! A great place to study, ain't that the truth? The best part is, they're completely--
[he closely the door (and silently mouths the words "sound proof"), then cut to Jake walking through the stacks]
JAKE: All up in the library, you gotta be quiet! This ain't no place to be startin' no riot!
[cut to Matt walking up to Jake]
JAKE: This kid comes up to me, like--
MATT: Where the annex at?
JAKE: Ummm ... What the [beep] is that?!
[cut to Jake on the fourth floor, as he points at the "Clear and Silver Chandelier" glass sculpture hanging from the ceiling]
JAKE: A chandelier gets UMD respect!
[he holds up his necklace]
JAKE: Chihuly's making one for around my neck!
[cut to Jake standing in the main hall of the library]
JAKE: Step into the circle and say "hello!" You'll be greeted with a friendly echo!
[cut to Jake standing near the front desk]
JAKE: The library, man! It's the place to be! So hit this up at U-M-D!
[cut to Jake standing in the stacks]
JAKE: Stacks and stacks and stacks of books!
[cut to Jake standing on the stairs]
CHORUS: Four floors! Gold doors!
[cut to various shots of Jake in the library]
JAKE: Got stacks and stacks and stacks of books!
CHORUS: Book stacks! No snacks!
JAKE: Four floors! Gold doors! Book stacks! No snacks! Four floors! Gold doors! Book stacks! No snacks!
[cut to more shots of Jake in the library]
JAKE: Yeah, stackin' books ... Yo, turn your phone off! Don't even think of answerin' that! You gotta be quiet, shh! Tryin' to read in here! Please, keep it down. Ladies, please, keep it down! Case you didn't know, it's a library! You gonna put that back on the shelf when you're done with it? Stack dem books! Uhh!
---
From umn.edu:
2008-09 was the second annual UMD Library Student Video Contest, where students submitted videos that were set in the library or about the library. Students competed for prizes by demonstrating their artistry as cinematic auteurs, and now we get to show off their work and show off our fine institution. Below are the entries from the past two years of the video contest.
Winning Videos from 2008
Winner in all three categories - Best Video,
Best Promotional Video, and Best Instructional Video:
Book Staxx
by Jacob Strassman and Matt Moline
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