The Death of Dewey Decimal
iPad vs. The Library
Added: 2 years ago
[a male librarian and a young woman are standing outside of the library]
LIBRARIAN: Hello, how can I help you?
WOMAN: What is this place?
LIBRARIAN: This is the library, and I'm the librarian.
WOMAN: What is a library?
LIBRARIAN: A library is a place you can go to research any number of things.
WOMAN: So, it's like the internet?
LIBRARIAN: Well ... no. Not exactly. We also loan out books.
WOMAN: So, it's like my iPad? Do you have every book ever?
LIBRARIAN: No, we have a selection of a few thousand books, and we loan out movies on VHS tape.
WOMAN: So, it's not even as good as the internet? Why would I come here, if I can just surf the internet on my iPad?
LIBRARIAN: Well, there's ... you can look at ... we have movies on tape.
WOMAN: Well, if I'm going to visit the 80s, I will be sure to stop by here first. Who pays for this?
LIBRARIAN: The money comes from the state.
WOMAN: Great. So my tax money pays for this obsolete bullshit?
WOMAN: And, why are there so many old people sitting inside reading the newspaper?
LIBRARIAN: The McDonald's down the street no longer lets them sit there all day with just one cup of coffee.
WOMAN: You said you are the librarian. What is that?
LIBRARIAN: That is my job. I help people find books.
WOMAN: Holy fucking shit! Really? Do you actually get paid for that?
WOMAN: Do you really think that's a job for a man?
LIBRARIAN: [pauses] No, it's not. I'm pathetic, and I will die alone.