m0ral 0rel - s2e5 - offensiveness (1/2)
5:31
Orel takes to picketing with Ms. Censordoll.
Tags: moral orel
Added: 11 months ago
From: godschef
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[Orel and his friend Doughy is ordering a malt soda from Mr. Figurelli's store, when they notice the librarian approaching]
FIGURELLI: [nervously] The egg lady ...
OREL: Miss Censordell, the librarian?
FIGURELLI: Yeah, eggs are all she eats. Picky about 'em, too. Real picky.
[Miss Censordoll enters the store]
DOUGHY: Uh oh ...
FIGURELLI: [acts happy] Mornin', Fran! How would you like 'em today?
CENSORDOLL: Under-fried, Figurelli! Extra slithery!
FIGURELLI: Sure thing!
[he goes into the back, while Miss Censordoll takes a seat next to Orel]
OREL: [nervously drinking his soda]
[when Figurelli returns with a plate of eggs, Miss Censordoll grabs them out of his hands]
CENSORDOLL: Give me those! [punches him in the face]
FIGURELLI: [groggily] No prob ...
CENSORDOLL: [begins noisily slurping the runny eggs out of the dish]
DOUGHY: Huh, I gotta go throw up all of a sudden. Wanna come along, Orel?
OREL: No thanks, Doughy. I'm happy right here!
[he turns to the librarian]
OREL: You sure like eggs, doncha Miss Censordoll?
CENSORDOLL: Why wouldn't I, Orel? They're one of life's only pleasures ... next to picketing.
OREL: Picketing?
CENSORDOLL: Mmmmm, picketing ... You know, uh, protesting. Purifying. Doing God's work.
OREL: [perks up] G-God's?
FIGURELLI: [comes back and takes her plate] On the house, Fran ... Heh, as long as--
CENSORDOLL: Sleep easy, Figurelli! Your establishment remains untouched by my moral sanctions ... for the time being.
[she gets up and leaves]
FIGURELLI: Whew! That's all I need, is a picket line blocking out my valuable customers!
OREL: Golly, why would anyone picket the corner store, Mister Figurelli?
FIGURELLI: Ah, that broad always finds a reason! It's like God has been shoved up his keister, Orel ...
[he leaves]
OREL: [to himself] Wow! I think I'm gonna have to spend more time at the library ...
[cut to inside the Thomas Bowdler Library, where Orel is carrying a stack of books when he notices Miss Censordoll bending over her desk to write something down]
OREL: [he sneaks up from behind and starts staring at her keister]
CENSORDOLL: [catches him] Why are you looking back there, Puppington?
OREL: Just checking for something ...
[he sees that the librarian is actually drawing up picket signs]
OREL: Hot dog, picket signs!
CENSORDOLL: There for this Saturday's screening of "The Greatest Story Ever Told" ...
OREL: That's not a dirty movie.
CENSORDOLL: Oh, they all are, Orel ... if you find a way to look at them juuuust right!
OREL: But, it's about the life of our Lord ... It can't be bad.
CENSORDOLL: Let's let God be the judge of that, shall we?
[she is suddenly "possessed" by the Holy Spirit and starts speaking in tongues, as her hand scribbles words on the sign by itself]
CENSORDOLL: [looks down and sees that the sign now reads "Movie too long and boring! Distracts audience into whoring!"] Of course! That God even makes me feel inferior ...
[she looks at the stack of books in his hands, with titles like "Origin of the Species," "The Little Prince," "Understanding the Human Body," and "Beneath the Planet of the Apes"]
CENSORDOLL: [angrily] What do you have there?
OREL: Oh, just some books I thought looked interesting.
CENSORDOLL: [she grabs them out of his hands] Ah, yes! Nicely spotted, Orel!
[she starts talking to the books themselves]
CENSORDOLL: Thought you'd weasel your way onto my shelves, eh my pretties?
[she throws the books into a nearby flaming barrel marked "Book Depository"]
CENSORDOLL: [to Orel] Young man, you've a good nose for the offensive ... that's a special gift.
[she reaches into a jar of pickled eggs on her desk and hands one to Orel]
OREL: It is?
CENSORDOLL: I'm going to allow you to apprentice under me ...
OREL: Gee, thanks!
CENSORDOLL: [she starts caressing his cheek] Yes, that's what I need. A malleable young mind to really sink my teeth into! [laughs]
[cut to a group of picketers outside the movie theater]
ALL: Story of Jesus, immorally teases! Story of Jesus, immorally teases!
[an old woman and two children try to enter the theater, but are jeered by the picketers]
OLD WOMAN: Please let us in! What else am I supposed to do with my grandchildren for two hours?
CENSORDOLL: We shouldn't tolerate evil just because it's convenient!
[Miss Censordoll and Orel turn towards the ticket booth]
MOVIE THEATER EMPLOYEE: Um, one senior and one child for the 5 o'clock, Miss Censordoll?
CENSORDOLL: In your dreams, scab! This moving picture has officially been deemed morally unfit by God himself!
OREL: That's right, we're offended!
CENSORDOLL: And for your information, I have exactly two and a half decades before I will have the displeasure of receiving a senior discount at this pit of hell!
[she holds up her driver's license, which reads "D.O.B 40 Years Ago Today"]
MOVIE THEATER EMPLOYEE: Gulp. Happy ... [astonished] fortieth birthday?!
CENSORDOLL: Indeed!
OREL: Your birthday? Why didn't you say something, Miss Censordoll?
CENSORDOLL: I prefer not to annually celebrate the emergence of my unclad body out of such an unsavory passage as my mother's womb!
[...]
[Orel is picketing outside of Mister Figurelli's store, after finding out that eggs come from the "secret lady part of a chicken"]
ALL: Outlaw all the eggs, that come from between the legs!
FIGURELLI: [exits his store] Orel! Uh, would you like a free phosphate?
OREL: [puts down his "Hell in Every Shell" sign] No use, Figurelli! Your bribes won't work here?
FIGURELLI: Bribes won't work? You're inhuman!
OREL: And you're selling immoral goods!
FIGURELLI: Aw, come on son! Uh, how could goods be bad? [nervous laugh] Ya get it?
OREL: [gives a stern look]
FIGURELLI: Come on, Orel! Not the eggs! I can't deal with Censordoll's wrath! Meet me halfway here, please!
OREL: Halfway to hell is closer than I wanna get!
[the picketers keep chanting, when Miss Censordoll arrives on the scene]
CENSORDOLL: And what is all this horseplay, Figurelli?
FIGURELLI: That little brat! He's protesting ...
CENSORDOLL: [gets a big smile on her face]
FIGURELLI: Eggs!
CENSORDOLL: [quickly frowns] Oh, he is, is he?
[she approaches Orel, who is throwing eggs at an old lady trying to enter the store]
CENSORDOLL: Orel!
OREL: Hi, Miss Censordoll! Pretty great, huh?
CENSORDOLL: I thought I'd taught you to close your mind, not lose it!
OREL: But eggs are evil!
CENSORDOLL: And who deemed that?
OREL: They come from naughty lady places!
CENSORDOLL: Um, yes ... well, this time it's alright.
OREL: Why?
CENSORDOLL: Oh, because they're delicious, and nutritious, and they come in a handy shell!
OREL: Really, Miss Censordoll! We shouldn't tolerate evil just because it's a convenience!
CENSORDOLL: Oh ... [giving up, she begins quietly chanting] Outlaw all the eggs, that come from between the legs.
[someone hands her an "Eggs Suck!" sign, and the picketers join in]
ALL: Outlaw all the eggs, that come from between the legs!
[...]
[Orel and Miss Censordoll are sitting at the counter in Mister Figurelli's store]
OREL: [happily] Boy, it sure feels good to be right, huh, Miss Censordoll?
CENSORDOLL: [depressed] Good ... right.
FIGURELLI: [puts two plates on the counter] How about some eggs?
OREL: Are those eggs righteous, Mister Figurelli?
FIGURELLI: Oh, sure! There's always a loophole ... see?
[he holds up an egg carton labelled "Dr. Caesarean's Inoffensive Unlaid Eggs"]
FIGURELLI: How 'bout 'em, Fran? They're sin-free!
CENSORDOLL: Sin-free ... that's for me.
[she takes a bite, but obviously isn't enjoying herself, and gets up to leave]
CENSORDOLL: I have to go ...
OREL: [happily eating his eggs] See ya, Franny!
[cut to Censordoll - wearing a trenchcoat to hide her identity - entering a "nightclub" located in Farmer Phonycrop's barn called "Laid"]
PHONYCROP: This way, ma'am ...
[she heads for a booth in the back]
PHONYCROP: How do ya like it?
CENSORDOLL: Au natural!
[she takes an egg and begins rubbing it on her face]
CENSORDOLL: Oooh ... Mmmm ... Oh oh oh ... Precious eggs.
---
From wikipedia.org:
The American stop motion animation series "Moral Orel" originally aired on Adult Swim from December 13, 2005 to December 18, 2008 and has been described as "Davey and Goliath...meets South Park."
The program takes place in the fictional capital city of Moralton, in the fictional U.S. state "Statesota," which appears to be made up of some of Kansas, much of western Missouri, northern Oklahoma, and a small portion of Arkansas. According to the globe shown in the opening credits, Moralton is in the exact center of the United States, with the town's church at the exact center of the town (and therefore the country). It is in the bible belt.
The main character is Orel Puppington, a student at Alfred G. Diorama Elementary School, who constantly tries to live by the Protestant Christian moral code as articulated in church or by his father, Clay. Orel naively follows this "code" to its logical extreme, with consistently disastrous results. Overall the show seems to be a critique of the WASP archetype.
[...]
Season 2, Episode 15 ("Offensiveness")
Orel witnesses Mr. Figurelli giving Ms. Censordoll free, underfried eggs (eggs are her "only source of pleasure") to keep her from protesting his corner market. This inspires Orel to join her crusades against movies, books, and pretty much everything. Eventually he realizes that eggs come from a "naughty place between chickens' legs" and starts protesting them being served at Figurelli's market. This angers Censordoll, but she is incapable of telling Orel to stop the protest without losing her credibility as a protestor. Censordoll reluctantly joins in the protest against her beloved eggs, causing a townwide ban on all eggs save for "Sin-free" Cesarean-born eggs. The episode closes with her sneaking off to an illegal egg blackmarket set up by a deranged farmer, who is sexually obsessed with the way that his hens lay eggs.
[...]
Francis Clara Censordoll is the town librarian, employed at the Thomas Bowdler Library, and arguably the primary antagonist of the series. She is a puritanical individual who spends her time censoring and destroying books she considers immoral (i.e., nearly all of them). The initials of her full name are FCC, a reference to the Federal Communications Commission. She also fights very hard to keep children away from "filthy thoughts," whether it is tracking kids who are reading about Renaissance art or leading protests against the offending individual. She frequently leads protests in front of the local movie theater, even protesting such movies as The Ten Commandments and The Wizard of Oz. Despite her elderly appearance, she is in truth, only 40 years old. In "Help," it is revealed her hair was originally black, and that Bloberta was part of her protest group and Bloberta tried to be as clever as her, but to no avail. Censordoll makes terrible mistakes about people like Fakey's wife would last forever but ending horribly because of Fakey's affair and throwing her out. Her own indulgences got her in trouble in "Offensiveness" when natural birth eggs, her favorite food, became outlawed and she was forced to find black market substitutes for her craving, thus falling into hypocrisy. She herself however has been shown to violate her own code of ethics if it means getting what she wants. For example in "Nesting" and "Alone" despite her strong aversion to nudity and premarital sex she uses her body to get the eggs she craves. It is revealed in "Alone" that Censordoll's obsession with chicken eggs is due to that she does not possess human eggs herself: when she was an infant her mother had surgery performed on her that removed her reproductive system (it is not clear whether this was for a legitimate medical reason, or some sort of religious motivation). As such, she considers herself to be immaculate and has a messianic complex regarding her importance within Moralton (this was shown in the opening sequence of "Nesting," as Censordoll's hand was shown moving the clouds away in God's place). In "Nesting," Censordoll embarked upon a scheme to seduce Orel's father Clay Puppington, offering to be his mistress, using the fact that she was unable to produce children and manipulating his Oedipal feelings towards his dead mother, to convince Clay of her potential as his mistress. She was voiced by Jay Johnston in the first two seasons and by Scott Adsit in the third season. Her final appearance is in the last episode, "Honor".
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