Do you have an appointment? Dogtown - BBC comedy
In this sketch from BBC's Dogtown the librarian tries to make an appointment with the optician. But is it just an eye test he is after? Find out in this funny British comedy tv series.
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Added: 6 years ago
[Geoff is waiting outside the "Ophthalmic Optician" store, wearing a trenchcoat and smoking a cigarette, when the female optician arrives to open the door]
GEOFF TORVILLE: Hey lady. Got a light?
CAROL GOMEZ: I'm sorry?
GEOFF TORVILLE: [chuckles] Some kinda joke, isn't it? The type without the laugh, right?
CAROL GOMEZ: I'm sorry, do you have an appointment here?
GEOFF TORVILLE: Pre-booked?
CAROL GOMEZ: Yes, pre-booked. That's what an appointment is, a pre-arranged slot of time in which to have an eye test.
[she opens the door and he hurries in after her]
GEOFF TORVILLE: Help me, please! I'm very short of sight! Self-diagnosed, I've known it for years. I've never ...
CAROL GOMEZ: For years? Have you never had an eye test before? Why not?
GEOFF TORVILLE: Sheer personal vanity. I can't see to shave now ... I run a big library.
CAROL GOMEZ: Oh yes, the library here. Yes.
GEOFF TORVILLE: I'm short of sight. You're short of time.
CAROL GOMEZ: [pause] No, you're wrong, because I'm both. I'll squeeze you in on my break. Return at ten o'clock.
"Live! Girls! Present Dogtown" is a comedy series shown on BBC Three.
It tells the story of life for the residents of Horton-le-Hole, a fictional coastal town where things are not all they seem. A controlling optician meets a mild librarian to enact secret fantasies as Oscar-winning movie stars and Olympic champions; a socially inept teacher dreams of becoming a deputy head; a pyromaniac dwarf psychic has set up a business in a bus stop; and, while romantic fiction books are systematically and mysteriously vandalised, one of the greatest love affairs the world has ever known begins to stir in the library.
Written by Sunderland twin sisters Emma and Beth Kilcoyne, and starring Emma Kilcoyne and Sam Battersea, who perform in a number of guises, the series is based on their live act, Live! Girls!, which played in Edinburgh to rave reviews. Emma Kilcoyne plays Eenie Thompson, the 73-year-old arsonist dwarf; Bill Taddler, the misguided and overbearing geography teacher; and Denise Taylor, the put-upon librarian with a secret. Sam Battersea plays Sheila Taddler, Bill's long-suffering wife, and Carol Gomez, the unusual optician with the domineering fantasy life.
Dogtown's regular supporting cast includes Geraldine McNulty (The Smoking Room, My Hero) as Sue McCardle, the ruthlessly ambitious "Scale Two" librarian; and James Gaddas (Bad Girls, Casualty, Holby City) as Geoff Torville, her debonair, film noir-ish boss; as well as Rachel Pickup, Madelaine Newton and Dave Johns. The series also features cameo appearances from Kevin Whately and Imelda Staunton.
Geoff Torville (played by James Gaddas) is the man in charge at Horton-le-Hole Library; to him, this is akin to heading up a multi-national conglomerate. His self-image is almost wholly derived from film-noir heroes, so his dialogue is best described as Chandler-esque with a Middlesborough accent. He deports himself like the romantic lead in his own life story, a trait which renders his burgeoning flirtation with Sue all the more seductive to them both.