Poor Keanu - The Librarian
3:53
In the first episode of this new series from the UCB Harold Team Graceland, famous actor Keanu Reeves visits his local library.
Keanu Reeves: Peter Sherer
Dolly Chaplin: Johnna Scrabis
Writer: Annie Barry
Director: Justin Lamb
Director of Photography: Tim Young
Production Assistant: Talia Koren
Graceland Outro: Ryan Simmons
Actor and Tai Chi aficionado Keanu Reeves can't catch a break in this new web series from the UCB Harold Team Graceland. Featuring Annie Barry, Sean Casey, Justin Lamb, Joey Price, Peter Sherer, Johnna Scrabis, Marshall Stratton and Joel Weidl.
Follow us at...
http://face book.com/gracelandcomedy
http://twit ter.com/gracelandcomedy
http://gracelandcomedy.tum blr.com
Tags: Keanu Reeves (TV Actor) Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre (Organization) Library (Building Function) Buddhism (Religion)
Added: 5 months ago
From: Graceland
Views: 1,059
[scene opens with "Keanu Reeves" sitting on a bench while Billie Holiday's "Stormy Weather" plays, as "Poor Keanu" appears on screen]
[cut to Keanu walking up to the front desk of a public library carrying a stack of books, as the young female librarian (long brown hair, low-cut black blouse glasses) is reading a copy of Linda Lael Miller's "Big Sky Summer" (not even bothering to look up as he approaches)]
[cut to a closeup of the librarian's face (her lips moving as she continues to read), while Keanu patiently waits for her to acknowledge him]
DOLLY: I'm sorry, this is just getting so--
[she lifts up her glasses and finally looks up at him]
DOLLY: [pause] Good.
KEANU: Uh, that's alright, I just ... wanna check out these books.
DOLLY: You're Keanu Reeves!
KEANU: Yeah, it's nice to meet you.
[he smiles and offers his hand, which she shakes vigorously]
DOLLY: Dolly ... Chaplin! I'm the librarian here.
[she smiles, then gets an overwhelmed look on her face]
DOLLY: Wow, you're ... just amazing. This is more exciting than when we had the blood drive.
KEANU: That's very, that's very nice.
[she smiles and continues staring at him, so (without breaking eye contact with her) he slowly pushes the books across the desk towards her]
DOLLY: Oh!
[she laughs and reaches for the books]
DOLLY: Lemmee get those set up for you, Keanu Reeves!
[she reads the title of the first book]
DOLLY: "The Purpose-Driven Life" ...
[she gets a confused look on her face, as she looks up at him]
DOLLY: Purpose driven life ... Why would you need to read something like that? You're Keanu Reeves!
[he gives an awkward smile, then she suddenly gets a serious look on her face and lowers her voice]
DOLLY: You know what your purpose is.
KEANU: It's about, uh, not trying to have negative thoughts. Y'know, I ... I'm very hard on myself.
DOLLY: Ah ... That is so unattractive in a man.
[she quickly looks back down at the book, while Keanu (though obviously flustered by her response) keeps smiling]
KEANU: Whu, uh, what?
DOLLY: You're Neo! And you're ... that character you played in "Speed!" Y'know?
[she laughs]
DOLLY: You're, you're the tough guy! All you have to worry about is saving the world, and ...
[she pauses, then pulls her hair back and gives him a "come hither" look]
DOLLY: Falling in love with the gorgeous brunette.
[she smiles, then puts her hand on the stack of books]
DOLLY: So that's why these are, just like, such a joke! Y'know, what're you really reading?
[he nods his head and continues to smile]
KEANU: Uh, those were just movies I was in.
DOLLY: [pause] I know that those are just movies you were in ... Are you implying that I don't know the difference between fantasy and reality?
KEANU: Uh, no, I wasn't trying to imply that.
[she looks down]
DOLLY: I, I get it.
[she looks back up at him, her smile gone]
DOLLY: I sit here reading romance novels all day, so ... I must be too stupid to know the difference between fiction and non-fiction. Is that it?
[he looks around nervously, as she gives him a dismissive laugh]
DOLLY: Yeah, okay. Well, let's finish this.
[her star-struck demeanor now replaced with an all-business (and slightly offended) attitude, she slams the book down on the desk and begins reading the titles of his other books]
DOLLY: "The Four Agreements," okay ... "Teach Yourself Fucking Buddhism?"
[she looks up at him in disgust]
DOLLY: Are you fucking kidding me?!
KEANU: Uh, I'm not sure you should be ... yelling obscenities in the library.
[she takes the glasses off her head and throws them down on the desk, then gets up and stares him in the eye]
DOLLY: I can yell all the obscenities that I wanna yell! I! Am! The! Librarian! Okay?
[she takes the books and tosses them into his chest]
DOLLY: There ya go! And another thing, Keanu Reeves ... Bet if there was a bomb in here, you wouldn't have a fucking clue how to dismantle it.
[she sits back down]
KEANU: Uh, you are corr--
[she tosses the last book on top of the pile in his arms, then sits back down]
KEANU: Correct, I wouldn't know anything about that.
[she goes back to reading her romance novel (without her glasses), while he just stands there awkwardly]
KEANU: [pause] Look, I'm so sorry if I upset you. I'm not sure what I did. Uh, whatever--
[the librarian (without looking up from her book) angrily points towards the door]
KEANU: [pause] Okay.
[he takes his stack of books and leaves]
---
From knowyourmeme.com:
Sad Keanu is a photoshop meme based on a paparazzi photograph of the Canadian American actor Keanu Reeves sitting on a park bench and enjoying a sandwich by himself.
Origin
The photograph of sullen-looking Reeves eating a sandwich was taken sometime in May 2010 by the Splash News photographer Ron Asadorian. The earliest known "Sad Keanu" photoshop thread can be found on 4chan-like archive called Green-ovale.net, from the /tv/ (television & films) board, dating May 23th 2010. Another thread would pop-up on 4chan imageboard's /a/ (anime) board dating back to June 1st, 2010.
On June 3rd, 2010, Reddit user rockon4life posted an image with the phrase "I really enjoy acting...Because when I act, I'm no longer me" in a thread entitled "Keanu. More sadness in comments". The thread quickly made it to Reddit's front page, gathering over 281,000 page views.
No comments:
Post a Comment