Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Case Study No. 1566: "The Librarian's Book"

The Librarian's Book
Trevor gets sucked into another world by the means of a mysterious book he got at the library.
Tags: molver productions trevor kirk nick bernier thedude27x donaldisthebest1 the librarians book alice in wonderland another dimension world land cat whiskers library mad best of me morningwood fight scence humor strange weird stupid funny crazy random books reading home video haunting paranormal
Added: 3 years ago
From: MolverProductions
Views: 135

The Librarian's Book
A Molver Productions Film

[scene opens with the "female" librarian (really a young boy with huge pillows under his shirt and a kerchief over his head) typing on a calculator as if it were a computer, when a young male patron enters]
TREVOR: I'm here to learn! Yeah ...
[he starts browsing the shelf]
TREVOR: Huh ...
LIBRARIAN: It's gonna be like ten minutes before the library closes, so you need to hurry up!
TREVOR: Okay, god ... take my time!
[he continues browsing, then stops at a large book sticking out of one of the shelves]
TREVOR: Ooh ...
[cut to Trevor bringing the book to the librarian]
TREVOR: Hey, I'd like to ... uh, take this book out.
LIBRARIAN: Um, you can't, sir.
TREVOR: What, why?
LIBRARIAN: This is really dangerous.
TREVOR: It was on the shelf!
TREVOR: It was on the shelf!
LIBRARIAN: Well, I was gonna do it! I was gonna take it off and put it here when it closed!
TREVOR: [pause] It was on the shelf!
LIBRARIAN: But this book is pretty dangerous!
[she points at the cover]
LIBRARIAN: It might say "How to Draw Comics the Marvel Way" ... but it's not! It's before Christ, this book! And there's a lotta mean spells in it.
TREVOR: Spells?
LIBRARIAN: And you go into a different world. You might die, because there's bad things there. I was there once when I was a kid!
TREVOR: Okay, okay ... So it's a crazy librarian here!
[cut to another shot of Trevor, as he appears to acquiesce to the librarian's demands]
TREVOR: Okay, then ... I'll just get another book, if that's okay with you.
LIBRARIAN: Yeah, it's okay.
TREVOR: Yeah, okay.
LIBRARIAN: That makes me very happy--
[he turns as if he's going to leave]
TREVOR: Well, yeah, I'm just gonna grab a book really--
[he turns back and grabs the librarian's "chest", causing her to drop the book, which he picks up and then runs out of the library]
TREVOR: Woo hoo!
LIBRARIAN: You rapist! You're a rapist, man!
[cut to Trevor taking the book into a dark closet, as he uses a flashlight to begin reading]
TREVOR: Oh ... Oh, wowie!
[the Wicked Witch's theme song from "The Wizard of Oz" suddenly plays, as the lights switch on and off while Trevor tries to keep the book from "eating" his face]
TREVOR: Ahh! Ahh!
[the lights go out, then Trevor "awakens" to find himself in an unfamiliar room]
TREVOR: Oh man ... Oh. Oh, whoa, what is this place?
[he looks up at something off camera]
TREVOR: What the fuck?!
[the camera pans up to show a man wearing a large cat mask]
WHISKERS: Can I give you a paw, sir?
[he helps Trevor to his feet]
TREVOR: Whu ... Uhhh, what are you?
WHISKERS: My name is Whiskers! I'm a cat ... Meow!
TREVOR: You're a walking talking caaaa--
[the "cat" starts stroking Trevor's face in an affectionate manner]
TREVOR: Uh, uhhhh ...
[he slaps his hand away]
TREVOR: What is this place, Whiskers?
WHISKERS: Well, this is the land of Foodywoodywikkarah!
TREVOR: "Foody Woody Wikka" ...
TREVOR: "Rah?"
TREVOR: Whiskers, I ... I need to get outta here! How do I get home?
WHISKERS: Oh, you wanna get home?
WHISKERS: Oh, that's easy! All you do is walk that way!
[he points behind him]
TREVOR: That ... Really? That, that's it?
WHISKERS: That's it! You just walk that way!
TREVOR: Oh ...
WHISKERS: You walk that way until you get to the place you need to go!
TREVOR: Oh, thanks!
WHISKERS: That's how it works in the land of Foodywoodywikkarah!
TREVOR: Well, thanks Whiskers ...
WHISKERS: You're welcome!
TREVOR: Okay, I ... You're not comin', are you?
TREVOR: Okay--
WHISKERS: I'm gonna stay here and play with yarn ... because I'm a cat!
[cut to Trevor walking down the hallway]
TREVOR: Aww, I am totally lost! Whiskers told me this direction, aww!
[he stops and enters a room filled with Smurfs toys and memorabilia]
TREVOR: Whoa ... Ooh, talk about your Smurfs!
[he looks around, then a man (actually the same kid who played the librarian, except he's wearing a hat and carring a curtain rod) emerges from a closet behind him]
EVIL ONE: I'm gonna kill you!
TREVOR: What? Why? Uh ... What? Who are you?
EVIL ONE: Me? I am the Evil One of this world!
TREVOR: And you're just gonna kill me?
EVIL ONE: That's my job! Alright, ready to die?
TREVOR: Uh, no ...
EVIL ONE: I'm gonna kill you!
TREVOR: No, please ... I don't know, I don't know what I did--
EVIL ONE: Drop down, right now!
TREVOR: I don't even know where I am! I don't even know ...
WHISKERS: [from off camera] Meow!
[a "sword" (i.e. another curtain rod) flies in from off camera and Trevor catches it]
TREVOR: Whu ... Whiskers! Alright!
[they begin to "duel" (as Morningwood's "Best of Me" plays in the background), when Trevor knocks the Evil One's sword away and pushes him up against the wall]
EVIL ONE: Please have mercy!
TREVOR: Uh, I think not!
[he runs the curtain rod across the Evil One's throat, "killing" him (as the "Game Over" theme from the original Super Mario Bros. videogame plays)]
[cut to Trevor walking down the hallway, when he comes upon a flight of stairs]
TREVOR: That must be it ... That must be the exit of this world, and back into mine! I'm almost there!
[he runs up the stairs]
TREVOR: Goodbye, land of Icky-whatever ... fuck you!
[he opens the door and runs in]
[cut to Whiskers peeking out from behind the corner]
WHISKERS: Mee-owww ...
[cut to Trevor asleep in the closet, with the book over his face, as he wakes up with a start]
[he takes the book and starts flipping through it]
TREVOR: Whu ... Oh. I'm going back to that library!
[cut to the librarian typing at her calculator, when Trevor enters and slams the book down on the table in front of her]
LIBRARIAN: [calmly] Hello, sir.
[he stares at her, then grabs her chest again before running off]
TREVOR: Woo hoo!
[cut to a closeup of the librarian's face, as she picks up the book]
LIBRARIAN: I told everybody, but they don't listen ...
[she laughs maniacally]

The Librarian's Book


The Librarian/Evil One



The End

Nine Inch Nails, K's Choice, Gary Jules and Morningwood

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