Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Case Study No. 1264: Staff of Unnamed Library (Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay)

Kumar Meets Vanessa At The Library Scene From H&KEFGB
This is the scene where Kumar meets Vanessa at the Library and they smoke in the Library and kiss at the end.
Tags: harold and kumar movie funny go to white castle escape from guantamo bay square root of
Added: 3 years ago
From: nokturnalmortom666
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[the camera quickly pans across a college library, catching glimpses of students and library staff walking amongst the stacks, when it stops on a young Kumar sitting at a table trying to do his homework]
[the camera pans back to reveal a group of his peers sitting at the table behind him, listening to loud music on their radio ... frustrated by the noise, Kumar starts to yell]
KUMAR: Excuse me, please!
[he turns to the other students (one of whom is reading a copy of "High Times" magazine]
KUMAR: Will you turn that off? This is a library!
[the students just laugh at him, so he angrily grabs his things and heads for a study carrel]
STUDENT 1: [from off camera] What a fucking chode!
STUDENT 2: [from off camera] Thank you, come again!
[he sits down and tries to concentrate, but hears a female voice yelling from the opposite carrel]
VANESSA: What the fuck!
KUMAR: Oh my god!
[he stands up to confront her]
KUMAR: You know, the whole reason people come to the stacks is for some peace and ...
[he calms down when he actually gets a look at the source of the yelling]
KUMAR: Quiet.
[the attractive female student looks down at her notes apologetically]
VANESSA: I know, I'm sorry. I hate it when people disturb me here, too. It's just this fucking calculus final is killing me!
[he goes over to her side and looks over her shoulder]
KUMAR: Do you mind if I take a look?
[he looks at her notebook]
KUMAR: You're actually very close ... May I?
[he tries to move her hand to take her pen, and accidentally brushes up against her shirt]
KUMAR: [pause] I touched your breast.
[she laughs]
VANESSA: It's okay.
KUMAR: Sorry ...
[he starts writing out an equation]
VANESSA: Wow. You're good at this.
KUMAR: Thanks.
VANESSA: What did you, like, take calculus in high school or something?
KUMAR: Actually, my dad taught it to me in sixth grade.
[she laughs]
VANESSA: What are you, like Doogie Howser?
KUMAR: No. Although that would be incredible. He's my hero ... I love that show.
[she looks at the paper in his hand]
VANESSA: What are you working on there?
KUMAR: This is just a poem for my creative writing class. It's like, um--
[she grabs it out of his hand]
KUMAR: Oh, um ...
[she starts reading, then laughs]
VANESSA: "The Square Root Of Three"?
KUMAR: No, no, I'm sorry ...
VANESSA: "A poem of love by Kumar Patel" ...
[he grabs it away from her]
KUMAR: I need this!
VANESSA: Hey, let me read it.
KUMAR: No, no.
KUMAR: Because it's lame.
VANESSA: Then read it to me.
KUMAR: There's no way I'm letting you see me in that light. Good luck with your calculus.
[he goes back to his seat, but she follows]
VANESSA: Come on, don't be embarrassed. You know, a lot of girls find intelligence sexy.
KUMAR: Look, I'm not ... I'm not even gonna be showing this to my professor, all right? That's why I'm so stressed out right now.
VANESSA: Stressed out, huh? Come with me.
[she grabs his arm and takes him behind the stacks]
KUMAR: [whispering] Where are we going? What?
[she takes a cigarette lighter and a joint out of her pocket]
KUMAR: [whispering] You're smoking drugs in the library? What if somebody catches us?
VANESSA: [whispering] Don't worry. It'll help you relax.
KUMAR: Oh, boy ... It's illegal!
[she lights up and blows smoke in his face, as he uses his paper to try and fan it away from him]
[he takes it and slowly inhales, then starts violently coughing]
KUMAR: This is poison!
VANESSA: Here, lemmee help ya ...
[she takes another puff, then pulls him in and starts kissing him ... when she's done, Kumar exhales the smoke and smiles]
KUMAR: I'm Kumar.
VANESSA: Vanessa.
KUMAR: You're still not reading that poem ...
[he leans in and kisses her again]



"Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay" (2008)

Kumar and Neil Patrick Harris talk about Vanessa when we flash back to how it all started. Kumar was a total nerd and Vanessa was a punk. They met up in the library where Kumar helped her with calculus. Kumar was trying to write a poem which he writes about the square root of three. He refuses to let her see it. They then go off to an aisle where she gives him his first joint. Kumar doesn't like it so she inhales, then kisses Kumar. This is probably why Kumar likes weed so much. It reminds him of Vanessa. They start making out in the library and a younger (punkier) Harold walks past them. NPH talks about his love that got away and decides they should head to a whore house.

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