Friday, November 8, 2013

Case Study No. 1106: Staff of Unnamed Library (Das Book)

Das Book
2:51
A video I thought was lost, but found it on my old schools library website after a curious visit. We made this for National Library week the year we graduated, 2007. The librarians wrote the lyrics for the parodies, and our warped imaginations came up with the rest.

I still can't believe they approved the final segment.
Tags: National Library Week Books Reading Love Read Fun Adventure Excitement Parody Baby Got Back Achey Brakey Heart
Added: 2 years ago
From: Jimbojangles
Views: 117

[scene opens with two male students repeating the phrase "Das Book" over and over (as various special effects are used to distort the image), then cut to one of the students in the school library dancing with three female librarians as an instrumental version of Sir-Mix-A-Lot's "Baby Got Back" plays]
STUDENT 1: I like big books and I cannot lie! When the bookmobile rolls by, I hop right on and fill my bag with books I'd like to try! Harry Potter, I wanna get witch'a, I saw your picture! You're good-lookin', I want your numba! Numba! Gimmee your numba! Books!
[cut to outside of the library, as one of the students (wearing a cowboy hat) is sitting on the ground and reading a book, when the other student (dressed as a redneck) approaches]
STUDENT 1: Boy! Boy!
[he knocks the book out of his hands]
STUDENT 1: What're you doin'?
STUDENT 2: [quietly] I was ... I'm readin' a book.
STUDENT 1: [yelling] You readin' books, boy?!
STUDENT 2: [pause] Yeah.
STUDENT 1: I told you, while the NASCAR race is on, that you ain't supposed ta be readin' dem books!
STUDENT 2: But I wanna read my books, daddy! I like 'em!
[he picks up the book and throws it back down]
STUDENT 1: Nuthin' good has come outta readin' books! Now Dale Earnhardt didn't read no books!
STUDENT 2: But, my English teacher said--
[he knocks his cowboy hat off]
STUDENT 1: You listen to me, boy! Dale Earnhardt would be disappointed in you! You think he reads books? No, he race-cars! That's what he does, he race-cars!
[cut to a closeup of his face]
STUDENT 1: You hear me?!
STUDENT 2: [quietly] Yes ...
STUDENT 1: Alright!
[he walks away, then cut to a closeup of the son's face]
STUDENT 2: But I wanna read my books, daddy, why can't I? Why?
[he takes a guitar out from behind his back, then plays to the sound of Billy Ray Cyrus' "Achy Breaky Heart"]
STUDENT 2: Don't take my book, my one and only book. Please don't take it, 'cause it's mine! 'Cause if you take my book, my one and only book, I'll get hit with a library fine!
[cut to another shot of the son playing his guitar, as the father sits in the back of a pickup truck]
STUDENT 2: Don't take my book, my one and only book. Please don't take it, 'cause it's mine! 'Cause if you take my book, my one and only book, I'll get hit with a library fine! Woo-hoo-hoo!
[cut to the son throwing his cowboy hat up in the air, then cut to a shot from behind as the two hug and walk off into the sunset]

No Matter What Your
Tastes Or Interests
The Library Has
Something For You!

Celebrate National
Library Week With
A Good Book.

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