After another long year of holding out our hats for financing, holding galas for shareholders, pre-production, temperamental stars, endless budget battles, and epic fights for creative control, Preservation Pictures has finally emerged on the other side with a new and truly groundbreaking film. Considered too provocative for Cannes (even Lars Von Trier called it "oddly unsettling") "Food Day" is now getting a proper release right here on the Youtubes. Behold yet another star-making turn from the man James Franco called "The next James Franco," Benji Barton. Marvel at the understated, serial killer menace of newcomer Laurie Mehrwin. Be awed by the barely-concealed psychoses lurking within Mark Wenthe, and the explosive, terrifying, visceral rage of Michael Gavrielides. With solid supporting turns from horror maven Jermaine King and delicious (literally) slasher queen Rachel Parnell, all captured under the patient, visionary, and arguably Bergmanesque eye of writer/director David Fitzgerald, "Food Day" is sure to go down in history as the greatest cannibal librarian film ever made. Hope you're hungry.
Tags: UGA Preservation UGA Libraries cannibalism David Fitzgerald Benji Barton Michael Gavrielides Rachel Parnell Laurie Mehwrin Mark Wenthe Jermaine King
Added: 2 years ago
[scene opens with black and white footage of four librarians sitting around a table in the break room]
BENJI: This pizza's gonna be so good ...
MIKE: Yeah, I'm starving.
LAURIE: I know, I haven't eaten anything all day.
JERMAINE: Me neither.
[the female head librarian () enters the scene]
RACHEL: Hey guys, pizza should be here any minute now ... Hope you're hungry!
[cut to a closeup of the wall clock (as the seconds slowly tick away from 11:58 to 12:15), then back to one of the librarians (bald, beard stubble, overweight, white t-shirt)]
MIKE: Wonder where the pizza is?
[the camera pans over to one of the other librarians (curly hair, glasses, striped shirt)]
JERMAINE: Yeah, it's definitely been long enough.
[the camera pans over to the female librarian (brown hair, white undershirt, cardigan sweater)]
LAURIE: It shouldn't be too much longer ...
[she reaches for her purse]
LAURIE: Here, I have some candy in my purse.
[she takes out a box of candy]
LAURIE: Junior Mints?
[the camer pans over to the other librarian (brown hair, black shirt)]
BENJI: Thanks Laurie, I'm sure this'll tide us over ...
[cut back to a closeup of the ticking clock, as the time changes to 12:30, then back to the librarians]
BENJI: Okay, this is ridiculous! What is taking so long?
[the bald librarian slams his fist on the table]
MIKE: I can't wait anymore! There's gotta be something to eat around here!
[cut to a closeup of a mini-refrigerator in the room, as Benji takes out a large bottle of methyl cellulose before sticking his finger inside and licking it]
[cut to Mike opening the microwave and digging his hand inside in frustration]
[cut to Benji overturning a wastebasket, spilling its contents all over the floor]
[cut to Laurie digging around inside of her purse, when she pulls out a single Junior Mint in triumph]
[cut to a closeup of the Junior Mint (as dramatic music plays)]
JERMAINE: How do we decide who gets it?
LAURIE: Wadda you mean, "we?" My bag, my Junior Mint!
MIKE: Well, that's not fair! I'm way hungrier than you!
JERMAINE: Yeah, and you only gave me two mints earlier ... You gave everyone else three!
LAURIE: Basic math, man! Eleven doesn't divide by four!
[they stare at each other, then Mike grabs for the mint, causing Laurie and Jermaine to jump up and try to wrestle it away from him]
LAURIE: Don't even think about it!
BENJI: Guys ...
[the other three continue to struggle, so Benji calmly gets up and grabs a large knife, which he plunges into the surface of the table next to them]
[cut to a closeup of the table's surface (where the knife has now punctured the center of the mint), then the camera pans up to a closeup of Benji's face]
BENJI: We'll split it!
[cut to a closeup of Benji's hands, as he uses the knife to cut the mint into four equal pieces]
[cut back to a closeup of the ticking clock, as the time changes to 12:50, then back to the librarians]
JERMAINE: I'm losin' it, man ...
LAURIE: Lunch hour's almost over ...
[cut to a closeup of Mike's face (as he is sweating profusely), then cut to Benji with a worried look on his face]
BENJI: Should we call the pizza place?
JERMAINE: It's way past that, man. Even if it comes now, we won't have time to eat it ... Probably be cold, too. It's no use, man. We're done for.
BENJI: Well, maybe Rachel will let us take a longer lunch. We could walk downtown ...
LAURIE: It's too far. We're too weak. We'll never make it.
[she lays her head down on the table]
JERMAINE: Yeah, she promised us free pizza ... Why should we have to pay for lunch now?
LAURIE: Yeah, that's not fair! She should've ordered it earlier!
JERMAINE: Or get off her lazy butt and gone and picked it up!
[cut to a closeup of Mike's face (as he appears to be on the verge of tears), then back to Benji]
BENJI: Well, there's no use complaining about it now. Rachel can't do anything to make us less hungry ...
[Jermaine gets an odd look on his face]
JERMAINE: Can't she?
BENJI: I, I don't ... What do you mean?
JERMAINE: You know what I mean.
BENJI: But ... you can't be serious.
JERMAINE: Rachel promised us lunch. She should deliver on that promise. That's all I'm saying.
BENJI: But that's crazy! Laurie, back me up here, tell him he's being crazy!
LAURIE: I'd be lying if I said ... I wasn't curious.
BENJI: But ... I mean, guys, come on.
[cut to a closeup of Jermine's face]
JERMAINE: Time's up, Benji. You know what we have to do.
[cut to a shot of Benji, as he looks over at Mike (still sweating profusely)]
BENJI: Mike ... Mike! You've been quiet for a long time. Wadda you think?
[he says nothing]
[cut to a closeup of the ticking clock (as it's almost one o'clock), then to various cuts of the librarians, until it gets back to a closeup of Mike's face]
MIKE: [screaming] Raaaa-chellll!
[he gets up and marches over to Rachel's desk at the back of the room, where he picks up a book and walks up behind her before hitting her over the head]
[cut to Mike carrying Rachel's unconscious body back to their table, where he puts her down]
[cut to various closeups of Rachel's hands and feet, as each librarian uses a vise to secure her to the table]
[cut to Rachel regaining consciousness, as she looks up at Benji]
RACHEL: Benji, help me! Please!
[he bends down next to her]
BENJI: I'm sorry. You promised us a food day. We've got a lotta work to do this afternoon, and we need our energy ... Please understand.
[he gets up, then cut to a closeup of Rachel's face]
RACHEL: But Benji, I'll make it up to you! I'll get more pizza tomorrow ... Better pizza! Transmit! I'll even--
[Benji walks in front of the camera (obscuring her face), then we hear a loud "thud", as he steps back and drops the book ("How to Cook Everything by Mark Bittman") that he apparently used to knock her out again]
BENJI: Transmit doesn't deliver!
[cut to footage (now in color) of Rachel's arms and legs covered in "blood," then cut to Benji (using a toothpick) and Mike (picking his teeth with the knife), their mouths also covered in blood]
[cut to Laurie and Jermaine sitting on the other side of the table, leaning back in their chairs and using toothpicks]
[cut to a wide angle shot of the librarian sitting around Rachel's body (as dramatic music plays), when an African American man enters the room carrying a pizza box]
PIZZA DELIVERY MAN: Did anybody order a pizza?
[the librarians sit up and stare at him (as the sound of the ticking clock can be heard), then the scene cuts to black and "Fin" appears on screen]
Written and Directed by