Warrior Librarian News Report
Biblia, the Warrior Librarian presents the news. Recording made by ABC Television. Unrehearsed.
Tags: librarian humor news warrior reading bug
Added: 5 years ago
["ABC News. Update - 90" Bed. More Than The Headlines End." appears on screen, then cut to an older woman reading from a cue card and speaking directly to the camera]
BIBLIA: Good evening, this is the Warrior Librarian reporting for ABC TV. First up, an amazing new discovery about why people read ...
[a graphic depicting a bug inside an ice cube appears behind her]
BIBLIA: The Reading Bug. Scientists have now produced a megabug. Unfortunately, too large to put through air conditioning systems. But there is hope for a smaller version coming soon ... Thank you.
[a graphic depicting a cartoon sheep appears behind her]
BIBLIA: Thank you for all the applause. Next up, internationally library associations are concerned there is too many sheep joining up. These people are not able to make their own decisions. They follow the crowd and do whatever they like. It's not a very good look, in fact it's quite "baaaaaad."
[a graphic depicting a cartoon semi-trailer truck appears behind her]
BIBLIA: And news just ahead, ABC radio and TV are calling for all librarians to come and read the news at their exhibition at the Royal Easter Show. So far, thousands of people have attempted this feat. To date, very few of them were librarians.
[a graphic depicting the ABCNews logo appears behind her]
BIBLIA: That's news up to this minute. Coming up next, the 7:30 report. Thank you very much for joining me, the Warrior Librarian.
["abc.net.au/ news" appears on screen]
OF A.B. CREDARO
A Work (and Life) in Progress
As a child, I loved animals; I lived on the outskirts of a country town and kept horses in my backyard. We always had a dog, cat, birds, and assorted reptiles, so it was not surprising that I grew up wanting to be a veterinarian. I worked hard at school and went to university....and in 1978 became a geologist.
This proved to be a financially rewarding career move. It was accompanied by a high level of job satisfaction, was intellectually challenging, and (almost) never boring. After 6 years working in the mining industry, I voluntarily left, and took a job selling steel library shelving.
After 18 months in the new job, I was progessively promoted from Customer Services Supervisor (the "complaints department") to State Sales Manager. I was well respected in the company, and had a number of huge salary jumps. So I left.
I guess I missed having animals around me. That would explain why I then became a high school teacher. Its a rotten, frustrating, poorly paid job, so I spent 15 years teaching science.
As I approached my golden years, I took a fancy to becoming a florist....so in 1999 I enrolled in a Master of Applied Science (Teacher Librarianship). In some ways, I suppose it bring would bring my life full circle - I'll still be working with animals students, many of the school library resources have a mineralogical content, and I could demonstrate my expertise with steel library shelving. With the addition of flowers on my desk, it would represent the culmination of many of my ambitions.
Having worked like a dog to finish a 2 year course in just over 10 months (setting a record that went completely uncelebrated by the University), I accepted a position in the Year 2000 as Teacher Librarian at a private senior college in the western suburbs of Sydney, Australia.
During that same year, I finished my second masters degree, a M.Ed. in Information Technology. This also set a new record for course completion - and despite numerous Distinctions and High Distinctions, I did not get the Dean's Award. Again. Sigh....
In the daylight hours of the year 2000, I ran the college library - and became highly regarded by my colleagues, principal, and students. I undertook a huge upgrade of the Resource Centre, built the digital collection, developed a website to support teaching and learning, and overturned the school culture - at least as far as library use was concerned. The outcome was a modern, functional, well-resourced facility, with myself in a well-run, comfortable workplace. So, naturally, I left.
In 2001, I accepted a position as Teacher Librarian at a comprehensive government high school (Years 7 to 12) on the outskirts of Sydney. The challenges presented in this employment will fill several chapters of my memoirs, if I ever get around to writing them. Luckily, I managed to alienate almost everybody in the first 6 weeks, so my time was not consumed with any social pursuits. Sigh. Biblia was "born" here - and my personal website mutated into the internationally acclaimed (although financially unrewarded) Warrior Librarian Weekly. After upgrading everything that didn't move, and attempting to improve those that did move, I (myself) moved. Yes, again.
From the start of the 2002 school year, I started work at a government middle school (Years 7 to 10) in an outer suburban "collegiate" school. This is an arrangement whereby several moderately successful Year 7-12 schools are combined to make a college group, by creating a new 'senior school' and consequently reducing the feeders to middle schools. The benefits include a reduced budget for the library, decimated staffing support, and rock-bottom library morale. Isn't educational change interesting? But still, was an awesome challenge.
As a result of attempting to change the world (starting with the school's library) single-handedly, I had an exciting ride in an ambulance to hospital. Fortunately, it wasn't the 'padded' variety (of ambulance or hospital). After some months of treatment, I accepted a temporary part-time position in an elementary school. Having never delivered a Reading Time experience to littlies (other than my own children - often against their will), this was an entirely unexplored area of school librarianship for me. When this posting reached it's pre-agreed termination point (another new experience), I took another temporary part-time posting to a post-compulsary vocational educational facility; a TAFE (Technical and Further Education) library.
Unfortunately (from the WLW perspective), that position was one characterised by compassionate administration, smooth operation and very sensible policies. Despite very intense investigation, there was absolutely nothing for me to whine about. Perhaps the sole beneficiary of the short-term nature of this position was The Muse.
Shortly after the start of the 2003 Australian school year, I went off to do stuff for the NSW Department of Education's "HSC Online" project. I spent many months finding quality Internet sites to support the state's students and teachers to Achieve the Outcomes of the secondary exit exam (and tertiary education entrance). Which is pretty important stuff. And yes, I got paid to spend my working days surfing the 'net. I figure someone found out I was having fun, so I then got sent off to the Department's Learning Materials Production Center (www.lmpc.edu.au).
After a few months after I arrived, we got restructured, and became the Centre for Learning Innovation (CLI). I'm still working there, but don't want anyone to know that I'm enjoying the work, so please keep this a secret.