Thursday, March 8, 2012

Case Study No. 0283: Staff of Unnamed Library (Baltbusters)

Just don't do it! some audio clips speak for themselves! The Baltbusters used to be a subscription feature of WKTU's website in New York City, they make prank calls to unsuspecting victims.

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Tags: baltbusters no crying embaressed dumb porn on library computers improv pranks spoof
Added: 3 years ago
From: Reaganwannabe
Views: 2,812

BALTAZAR: Hey, you're about to listen to the Baltbuster, exclusively on KTU dot com. Don't forget, listen for the new Baltbusters weekdays at 6:05, 7:05, and 8:05 with Baltazar and Goomba Johnny on KTU.
[phone rings]
BOB: Hello?
BALTAZAR: Hi, may I speak with Bob [beep], please?
BOB: Speaking.
BALTAZAR: Mr. [beep]?
BOB: Yeah.
BALTAZAR: Mark Geragos, calling from the administrations office, [beep].
BOB: Yeah?
BALTAZAR: Just got a, uh, disturbing email from the IS department about your computer usage at the library.
BOB: Okay, um ...
BALTAZAR: Can you, um, explain to me what your ... use of the computers for?
BOB: Um, uh, for research ... Uh, is this for recent stuff, or is it for--
BALTAZAR: What exactly is "MILF[beep] dot com"?
BOB: Uhhh, that, I think it was, uh ... It was a site, um, for disadvantaged children?
BALTAZAR: "MILF[beep] dot com"?
BOB: Yeah, uh, yeah. It's an acronym, I think, for "Members of the International Labor Federation"? Um, it's just looking for violations of, like--
BALTAZAR: Okay, because I'm logged on right now to this website, and ...
BOB: Yeah. I, uh, what may have happened was, I actually, it's MILF at ... Wh-what was the website again?
BALTAZAR: "MILF[beep]er" ...
BOB: Okay. Uh, yeah. It was an accident. Actually, that site, I mistyped it. Um, and I forgot to add ... Actually, I meant "MILF[beep], like at Hunter College. Um, and I just put "MILF[beep] dot com" and I should've put "dot edu."
BALTAZAR: So this was an accident?
BOB: Uh, it was an accident, and uh--
BALTAZAR: And it was for research?
BOB: Yes. It was for research. And I just, I just--
BALTAZAR: Okay, because ... according to the IS department, you logged onto that website over twenty two times.
BOB: Oh my god. Um ... Listen, um, I can, I can, I'll do, I can do--
BALTAZAR: I'm gonna be very honest with you right now. Your future at [beep] University is in jeopardy.
BOB: Like, a lot of people do this in the library, I'm not the only one that--
BALTAZAR: I have to call Andrew and Lynn.
BOB: Please, you can't ... my parents can't find out about this.
BALTAZAR: I think they deserve to know about their son's act of perversion.
BOB: Please, please don't do, please don't do that, okay? I'm really, please, I'm asking you--
BALTAZAR: It is school policy to inform the parents if--
BOB: I can't, I'm begging you! I am begging you, please don't do that, okay? Please don't do that! You don't understand how much trouble I'm gonna get into! Please don't, I'm really sorry! I won't do it again! I'm asking you not ... please, please!
BALTAZAR: What're your parents gonna say when I show them the website "MILF[beep] dot com?"
BOB: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god ... I'm [beep], I am so [beep] if you do this. Please--
BALTAZAR: You could end up getting expelled.
[he begins to break down and start crying]
BOB: Oh my god, please, I ... I'm, I'm so sorry, please. I'm begging you, please don't tell them.
BALTAZAR: Who is Stu?
BOB: [pause] What? Stu who?
BALTAZAR: You're up in Ithaca, right? Uh, this is Baltazar calling from New York City, the radio station KTU?
BOB: [pause] What?
BALTAZAR: And your boy Stu told me to get you on the Baltbusters, it's a prank phone call.
BOB: This is a ... Oh my [beep]!
[Baltazar begins laughing hysterically]
BOB: Oh my god, that was not funny!
BALTAZAR: Bro, you are crying on the phone!
BOB: You [beep] ass[beep], I can't believe this ...
[he begins laughing again]




09 Aug 2005 17:22:21 - Bob gets Baltbusted into thinking that he's viewing porn on the library computers! Doesn't he know that you only surf porn on your home computer and not on public library's!

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