Friday, July 25, 2014

Case Study No. 1466: "Cards Against Librarianship!"

Cards Against Librarianship!
6:20
Download the full deck here: http://shelfcheck.blog spot.com/2014/01/cards-against-librarianship- lets-play.html
Tags: cards against librarianship librarians libraries cards against humanity
Added: 6 months ago
From: ToonLib
Views: 11

This year, our library participated in Hour of Code. Next year, we'll participate in Hour of ___.
* Haggis.
* Half-assed attempts at gamification.
* Paranoia.

Oh, great. Someone stuffed the book drop with ___.
* Amy's Organic Palak Paneer.
* A tour group of first graders.
* LeVar Burton.

What's a librarian's worst nightmare?
* 52 bags of donated Reader's Digest Condensed Books.
* Sleeping with someone, then learning s/he pronounces it "Liberry."
* Getting endorsed for "public libraries" on LinkedIn.

The internet's down. I guess we'll all have to resort to ___.
* Back issues of Maxim.
* Crop dusting the stacks.
* Seething.

What's our Library Director's guilty pleasure?
* Dr. Who cosplay.
* Sucking and chewing on board books.
* Blogging anonymously.

If our branch manager doesn't stop ___ at every staff meeting, I'm going to scream.
* Inappropriately fondling an Orlando Bloom READ poster.
* Never shutting up about running half-marathons.
* Bringing Jesus into every conversation.

In a surprise rebranding effort, NYPL is replacing its iconic lion statues with with statues of ___.
* LEGO minifigs.
* Storytime MILFs.
* Gollum.

The #1 way to calm down an angry patron? ___.
* Roundhouse kicks.
* Raffi.
* My lovely lady lumps.

___ @ your library.
* Bedbugs.
* Twerking.
* Red tape.

Customers. Patrons. Members. Frankly, I prefer to call them ___.
* Sleestaks.
* Wildlings.
* Antibacterial wipes.

It's just not storytime without ___.
* Sriracha.
* Assisted suicide.
* Lap dances.

___ want/s to be free.
* Dobby.
* Chips and salsa.
* An ALA membership.

I have no idea how that librarian stays employed. As far as I can tell, s/he spends most of the day ___.
* Subtweeting about colleagues.
* Checking Facebook.
* Going into detail about lactose intolerance.

Librarians, you know? Sometimes I get the feeling we're all just ___.
* Letting the Pigeon drive the bus.
* Plotting to usurp Nancy Pearl's throne.
* Paraprofessionals.

I've had it. If I see one more patron ___ in here, I freaking quit.
* Networking.
* Vomiting.
* Failing to check Snopes.

"I'm afraid I have to ask you to leave. The library's scent policy expressly prohibits ___."
* Children.
* Ann Coulter.
* Wearing lots of cologne.

Since flashing the lights and making an announcement weren't working, we've switched to ___ to encourage patrons to leave the building at closing time.
* Gay weddings.
* Singing Kum-ba-yah.
* Giving wet willies.

Reading aloud to ___ can help young beginning readers gain confidence.
* Kale.
* Malcolm Gladwell.
* A Roomba.

Don't tell me you "love books" ... to be a good librarian, what you really need to love is ___.
* Territorial pissing.
* Prezis.
* Deflowering members of the Teen Anime Club during a Miyazaki marathon.

The new Nicholas Sparks book features a heterosexual white couple ___ on the cover.
* Pretending to understand Fair Use.
* Making beef jerky.
* Waiting 'til after the closing announcement to ask a question.

I'm usually pretty mellow, but woe be to the patron I catch in the act of ___.
* Wearing those shoes that look like feet.
* Mansplaining.
* Returning a book full of tape flags.

Well, who knew you could get fired for offering a patron ___?
* Constructive criticism.
* Paranormal romance.
* Deodorant.

Children left unattended in the library will be given an espresso and ___.
* Exorcisms.
* QR code tattoos.
* Brazilian waxes.

To eliminate jargon that patrons find off-putting and confusing, we will henceforth refer to "databases" as "___."
* "Rock star" librarians.
* Gluten-free goodies.
* Dewey, the Library Cat.

It's important for libraries to foster an atmosphere of ___.
* Holiday-themed sweater vests.
* DRM.
* Calling the Help Desk.

We firmly believe that in order to succeed in the 21st century, all children must have equal access to ___.
* Golf pencils.
* Ennui.
* Newbery books that only appeal to adults.

While facilitating access to information is libraries' first priority, ___ must be a close second.
* Pinning wedding ideas.
* Acronyms.
* Keeping up appearances.

Wikipedia can tell you all about ___, but our staff can show you in person.
* Waterboarding.
* Cameltoe.
* Tasers.

Youth Services Librarians agree: it's never too early to introduce your baby to ___.
* Library security guards.
* Annotated bibliographies.
* Sobbing quietly while learning to code.

Patron tip: with your library card, you have 24/7 remote access to ___.
* Siri.
* Google.
* Salon style at an affordable price.

Bulky, intimidating reference desks must go. In the future, nothing will stand between librarians and their patrons but ___.
* Emotional baggage.
* Devices that are incompatible with the library's ebooks.
* James Patterson's "co-authors."

It's Fine Amnesty Day! Today, you can pay off your library fine by/with ___.
* Riverdancing.
* Ritual sacrifice.
* A full performance of the "trololo" song.

What never fails to liven up a staff party?
* Groupies.
* Revenge served cold.
* Playing Jenga with those impossibly small Beatrix Potter books.

A good reference interview should always include ___.
* Feats of strength.
* Side eye.
* Checking out Mozart while doing Tae Bo.

My most popular storytime themes are "On the Farm" and "___."
* Shock and Awe.
* Lying down and giving up.
* Value Line.

The library's new Play & Learn Space offers early literacy-rich opportunities for little ones to interact with ___.
* Christopher Walken.
* Ornamental grass.
* The Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation.

Sessions are live-tweeted; slides are posted online. But attending conferences in person remains valuable for the opportunity to enjoy ___ with one's peers.
* "Happy ending" massages.
* Mixing up a batch of library-themed cocktails.
* Awkward silence.

---

From blogspot.com:

Cards Against Librarianship, the starter deck, is here. Please play and give feedback so it can be as much fun as possible.

You can download the deck here:

Cards Against Librarianship Answer Cards (371)
Cards Against Librarianship Question Cards (71)

*Huge thanks to Thomas Maluck, Carl Hess, and various folks on Twitter and the ALATT Facebook group for contributing card suggestions.

*There are many different forms of librarianship, and while I tried to keep the deck mostly general, I have mainly worked on the public-facing side of public libraries and I'm certain that's reflected. I took card suggestions from folks with different experiences, but if, due to lack of niche knowledge and after a simple Google search, I couldn't understand why they were funny, I left them out. I highly welcome and will link to specialty "Expansion Packs"--for ex, "Archivists' Expansion Pack"--as long as the cards in them are phrased to be compatible with as many of the cards in this starter deck as possible. Blank cards are provided above; if you want them to match exactly (not necessary), import each blank into PicMonkey or something similar and type in Arial.

*Creating question and answer cards that are compatible in a maximum number of situations was more challenging than I expected. For this reason, a few of the cards included in the preview versions posted here earlier did not make the final deck. Suggestions in this arena are welcome, too, as well as feedback as to the playability and compatibility of the starter deck. Please send them to elloyd74[at]gmail.com with the subject line "Cards Against Librarianship" (I sometimes miss notifications of comments on this blog).

*If you make an especially hilarious combination that you want to share, please do so on Twitter with the hashtag #CardsAgainstLibrarianship (or in the comments below, if you're not on Twitter).

IMPORTANT INFO: Cards Against Librarianship is inspired by Cards Against Humanity, and, as in CAH, you will find cards in CAL that refer to sexuality and other topics generally considered taboo in the workplace. If you've never played CAH, you might take a peek at the content of their cards before deciding if CAL is a game you want to look at and play with colleagues (or even alone). As a general rule, CAL is tamer--I didn't go anywhere near CAH's infamous "Toni Morrison" and "Pac-Man" cards--but what I feel comfortable including and what you feel comfortable reading may certainly differ. Using the blank cards provided above, folks can swap in their own tamer cards or raunchier cards, depending on preference.

Posted by Emily Lloyd at 8:05 AM

Case Study No. 1465: Unnamed Female Librarian (Cyber Seduction, His Secret Life)

Cyber Seduction (8/11)
7:46
Cyber Seduction [His secret life]
Jeremy Sumpter^^ xD
Tags: Jeremy Sumpter Cyber Seduction
Added: 6 years ago
From: TiGhTaShiT182
Views: 142,213

[scene opens in the Hoover High School library, as student Justin Petersen is sitting at one of the computer terminals (ostensibly working on a paper), when he looks around suspiciously]
[cut to the front desk, where an older female librarian (hair in a bun, glasses, white cardigan sweater with a high collar) flips through a book with a highlighter pen]
[cut back to Justin, who (satisfied that she's not paying attention) takes a USB drive out of his pocket and plugs it into the computer (no doubt to block the school's filtering software), then checks the search engine "Snoop EZ" for porn sites]
[cut to a closeup of the computer monitor (with pictures of several skimpily-clad girls), when an African American male student walks behind Justin]
[cut to Justin nervously looking around, as he quickly switches windows back to his Word document]
[satisfied that the student didn't see anything, Justin goes back to the porn site (now featuring video of a woman in a negligee]
[cut to a young female student sitting down at a table across from Justin ... he recognizes her from a porn site he's visited previously, so he returns to "Monica's Page"]
[he looks over at the girl (who's writing something down and doesn't notice him), then clicks on a link which shows video of Monica teasing that she's going to take off her top]
[cut to a shot of Monica as she continues to do homework, then to an extreme closeup of Justin's eyeball (which shows the reflection of the computer monitor)]

---

From wikipedia.org:

Cyber Seduction: His Secret Life is an original Lifetime television movie which was first broadcast on June 20, 2005. It was directed by Tom McLoughlin and written by Wesley Bishop and Richard Kletter. The movie stars Jeremy Sumpter, Kelly Lynch, and Lyndsy Fonseca. It is now available on DVD.

The film has become an internet phenomenon due to its overzealous portrayal of internet pornography and its obvious heavy bias on pushing a Christian agenda.

Plot
Justin Petersen is a popular 16-year-old high school student and a successful swimmer with a steady girlfriend, Amy. Justin's coach announces that Justin has made the All-State team, which pleases his parents, particularly his mother Diane, who used to swim as well.

Justin is introduced to internet pornography when a friend sends him a link to a softcore featuring Monica, a fellow student who has a crush on him. Captivated, Justin is then exposed to a porn film at a party, and later browses more explicit pornographic websites, only to be caught by his mother. It is easy for Diane to be aware of her son's behavior, as Justin does little to make his activities clandestine. Throughout the film, he continues to view pornographic images in public places, making little effort to cover his tracks.

Justin's late nights in front of the computer and increasing obsession with porn soon impact upon his lap times. He betrays Amy's trust by downloading porn onto her PDA, and exposes his younger brother Alex to porn, leaving Alex queasy. Justin begins to gain a reputation at school of being a "porn freak" after showing his friends S&M porn. Eventually, his addiction causes him to almost miss the All-State swim finals, where he places third. Discovering a CD-R titled Virgin Vaginas, Diane confronts Justin and moves his computer into the living room. This, however, does not stop him. Justin continues to surf the web for porn, eventually racking up extensive bills on his parents' credit cards. He goes to the extent of using a computer in the school library to access porn and gets caught hacking the internet firewall. As a result, he is suspended from the swim team and placed on overall probation.

Justin becomes closer to Monica and increasingly ignores Amy. After being pressured to have sex with him, Amy puts the brakes on their relationship, finding Justin's attitude towards sexual matters to be repulsive. However, when Monica tries to seduce him, Justin hesitates, and an angry Monica kicks him out of her house. Monica throws a physical tantrum alone after feeling rejected by Justin and bangs her own head, causing it to bleed. Soon after, Justin endeavours to make amends with Amy. After leaving Amy's house, he is noticed by another schoolmate, who relays to other schoolmates that he is near. Monica is seen in a restaurant with noticeable face injuries, and it is presumed she told others that Justin was responsible for them. The schoolmates beat Justin up on the street, disturbed by his reputation and the alleged incident with Monica.

Depressed after being physically attacked, Justin arrives at the school's swimming pool and leaps in, presumably to drown himself. Earlier in the movie, he would be under the water fantasizing about women and porn, but this time he thinks of all the things he has to live for. He saves himself and apparently breaks his addiction.

---

From alaeditions.org:

Cyber Seduction: His Secret Life (2005, made for TV). Jeremy Sumpter as popular high school sophomore Justin Petersen develops an addiction to internet porn. When his parents disconnect the internet at home, he finds it on the high school library computer. But he gets caught.

Thursday, July 24, 2014

Case Study No. 1464: Unnamed Female Librarian (The Lawrence Welk Show)

02-02-1980 (13) Mary Lou Metzger, Jack Imel - Ballin'The Jack & The Old Soft Shoe
2:13
Great entertainment and they are joined by Kathie the "Librarian." This clip is from an episode of the "Lawrence Welk Show."
Tags: Ragtime Home Video
Added: 2 years ago
From: navydoctrinidad
Views: 96

[scene opens inside a public library, as Jack Imel walks up to Mary Lou Metzger, who is sitting at the table reading a book]
JACK: Hey Mary Lou, whatcha readin'?
[cut to the young (but still stereotypical-looking) female librarian sitting at the front desk]
LIBRARIAN: Quiet, please!
[cut back to Jack and Mary Lou, as he lowers his voice]
JACK: [whispers] Whatcha readin'?
MARY LOU: This is a book on how to dance.
JACK: Aw, come on! You know how to dance!
MARY LOU: Yeah, but I'm learning a new one. It's called "Ballin' the Jack" ...
JACK: [loudly] "Ballin' the Jack?!"
[a group of patrons sitting at the table near them look up and tell them to "Quiet, please!"]
MARY LOU: Do you know how to do "Ballin' the Jack?"
JACK: Sure ...
MARY LOU: Really?
[they both walk to the middle of the library, where they start singing and dancing]
JACK AND MARY LOU: First you put your two knees close up tight. Sway 'em to the left, sway 'em to the right. Step around the floor, kinda nice and light. Twist around, twist around, with all your might.
[the other patrons are watching them and nodding in approval]
JACK AND MARY LOU: Spread your lovin' arms way out in space, do the Eagle Rock with style and grace. Swing your foot way round, bring it back, that's what I call Ballin' the Jack!
[they start tap dancing, as the librarian comes over with her hands on her hips and a stern look on her face]
LIBRARIAN: Quiet, please!
[she walks back to the front desk and starts looking over her books, but they continue to tap dance, so she once again comes over (as they climb up onto the table)]
LIBRARIAN: Softer, please!
[they climb down from the table, then start dancing and singing around the librarian]
JACK AND MARY LOU: Give me that old soft shoe, I said that old soft shoe!
[the librarian slowly starts dancing along with them]
JACK AND MARY LOU: Doo do, doo do, doo do do do!
[the librarian smiles and starts singing along]
ALL: Put your foot way round, bring it back, that's what I call Ballin' the Jack!
LIBRARIAN: [loudly] Yee haw!
[the librarian quickly covers her mouth in embarrassment, so the patrons and Jack and Mary Lou gather around to "shush" her, as the screen goes to black]

---

From tvrage.com:

The Lawrence Welk Show Season 25 Episode 21 :: "Rhythm is Our Business"
Original Airdate: Saturday February 02nd, 1980

medley: Ballin' The Jack/The Old Soft Shoe: sung and danced by Mary Lou Metzger & Jack Imel joined by Kathie Sullivan

Case Study No. 1463: Staff of the Metro City Library

Condemned: Criminal Origins- Metro City Library 1/3
10:48
All Birds, Metal Pieces, and T.V.s
Tags: condemned city library xbox 360 survival horror creepy violent
Added: 6 years ago
From: DreadArkive
Views: 656

[Ethan enters the abandoned Metro City Library, then (after exploring the front desk) enters the elevator and heads for the basement floor]
[the lights go out, and the doors open to reveal a darkened hallway full of rats (and an unseen female voice repeatedly saying "Thomas")]
[the screen goes black, then it is revealed that Ethan is still in the elevator and he had simply been hallucinating]
[the doors open, and Ethan begins exploring the "Library Administration" section of the library, when he finds the female forensics investigator]
ROSA: Thomas! Thomas, over here!
[she waves him over]
ROSA: This might not have been a good idea ... Squatters and addicts have moved in, and they don't like company!
[she walks over to a nearby table]
ROSA: Come this way. I have something to show you. I used my security clearance to do ... a little checking up on you.
[she points to a blue folder on the table]
ROSA: I found this folder in your supplemental personnel file.
[Ethan opens the folder and flips through the pages]
ROSA: During your last physical, they found several abnormalities. For starters, your bone and muscle densities are off the charts. You have a reputation for being tough ... but who knew?
[Ethan turns to another page in his file]
ROSA: You also have a hyperactive serotonergic system in the brain ... What that means, I have no idea.
[Ethan turns to another page in his file]
ROSA: And lastly, there's a chest x-ray that's been redacted.
ETHAN: Redacted?
ROSA: Yeah, right where your esophagus and larynx are ... Someone's blacked out the x-ray and added the notation "See subject's PR56." A PR56 is a special addendum to a personnel record, and yours is classified Black. That's pretty top-level security, way beyond either you or me.
[Ethan closes the folder]
ROSA: Our government is awfully interested in you.
ETHAN: I didn't know.
ROSA: Well, now you do. Maybe I shouldn't have told you, but there it is ... Oh, and I also left something there on the counter for you. Popular modification to the standard taser.
[she walks off, and the player selects "Pick up Super Taser"]
[Ethan goes to follow Rosa, but then has another hallucination, eventually waking up with Rosa standing over him]
ROSA: Jeez, Thomas, you okay? You looked like you were about to faint there ... Come on, let's get this over with.
[they being walking down the vandalized hallway]
ROSA: Scavengers looking for parts to sell, or just maniacs destroying things ... We have to find a terminal that isn't damaged.
[she stops at a closed door]
ROSA: Hello! Looks like someone left the master key in the lock.
[she opens the door]
ROSA: You search this office, I'll take that one over there. Look for a computer that's in working order.
[she moves an overturned bookcart to get to the office at the other end of the hallway, while Ethan enters the unnamed librarian's office and looks around (pulling the blade off a rusty paper cutter to use as a weapon)]
[the scene suddenly turns black and white, as Ethan sees a ghostly figure walking around the opposite end of the office, and slowly approaches it]
ROSA: [from off camera] Thomas, what's wrong? I can't get in, the door's jammed!
[masked figures suddenly appear and attack Ethan, but they eventually vanish after he swings at them with the paper cutter ... then he quickly returns to the locked door, only to find Rosa throwing a chair through the glass to get the door open]
ROSA: I told you we weren't alone ... Come on, I found a working computer.
[they walk over to a computer terminal at the other end of the hallway]
ROSA: It's a search engine specific to the library. Just type in The Torturer's name, and we should get the latest info from the local news, including broadcast feeds.
[Ethan sits down and begins typing on the computer, when he gets a "Connection Error: Network Service Down" error message]
ROSA: Dammit! Can anything else go wrong? We'll have to find the server room and get the network back.
[Ethan suddenly blacks out and has another hallucination ... when he comes to, Rosa is gone, then his cellphone rings]
SERIAL KILLER X: [over the phone] Well Thomas, you're certainly not as much help as I thought you would be. I'd expected so much more from you. I was thinking--
[the sounds of Rosa struggling can be heard over the phone]
SERIAL KILLER X: [over the phone] Ow, god! Bitch!
ETHAN: Rosa? Rosa?! Are you there?
[he hangs up, then continues exploring the library]
["Investigate / Use Detective Tool to find evidence" appears on screen, and Ethan uses a handheld blacklight to find some blood on the floor in one of the hallways]
["Find Evidence / Organic evidence glows a bright purple" appears on screen, and he uses the Sampler tool to analyze the blood, then turns his cellphone back on]
ROSA: [over the phone] This is Rosa. I am out of the lab at present, but will return shortly. In an emergency, please use my authorized Bureau cell number.
[he uses the cellphone to download the chemical analysis of the blood into the Bureau's database]
COMPUTER: [over the phone] Physical evidence received and stored.
[he hangs up, then finds several squatters/addicts sneaking around some bookshelves (killing them with his paper cutter)]
[he picks up an axe that one of the squatters dropped, then uses it to knock down the door to the server room ... he checks the server rack (labelled "Basement - Administration / Main Floor - Reading Room / Upstairs - Circulation / Upstairs - Rare Books Cage / Upstairs - Main Stacks") and sees that the light signifying the "Rare Books Cage" is blinking green]
[Ethan continues exploring the library, eventually making his way to the Shelburne Reading Room upstairs, where he finds the Rare Book Cage (with Rosa lying on the floor inside)]
[he uses a nearby sledgehammer to knock the lock off a ladder, then slides it to the end of the bookcase and climbs to the top of the bookshelf, jumping down to enter the cage and help Rosa (as two shadowy figures slither away from her upon his entrance)]
ROSA: Back off, you bastard! Come any closer and I'll rip your head off!
ETHAN: Rosa, it's me, Thomas!
ROSA: Ohhh ... Oh, he must have clobbered me in the back of the head before taking off.
ETHAN: Are you okay? There were these ... these shadowy things standing over you.
ROSA: What? Look, while you're chasing shadows, that jerk tried to kill me. I bit him good, though, right on the hand.
[she rubs her head]
ROSA: Did you get any of the blood sampled? I saw some hit the floor.
ETHAN: Yes, sampled and transferred back to the lab.
ROSA: Excellent.
[she gets up and heads for a nearby laptop computer]
ROSA: I can patch in through this computer and do a remote analysis.
[she sits down and begins typing]
ROSA: Bingo ... DNA from the sample matches DNA taken from the Metro Station hideout. This is the guy. This is our Serial Killer X. He killed the policemen, and he's been killing all of the other guys on your case list.
ETHAN: What did he want with you?
ROSA: He wanted to know what we knew about The Torturer. He made me look it up on the Net. He knows the whole MO now, the abduction, torture, suicide thing.
[she continues typing]
ROSA: Thomas, The Torturer is on your case list, and he's the only one whose trail hasn't gone cold since we ran into ... this Serial Killer X. X wants The Torturer to die, he's hunting him down.
[she pushes the chair back and points at the computer screen]
ROSA: Look at this.
[a video of a female newscaster begins to play]
JENNIFER: This is Jennifer Alben reporting from Police Headquarters. Developments in the case of The Torturer serial killer. A retired gym teacher from the city's juvenile rehabilitation program has informed police of contact he had almost eight years ago with a troubled youth named Carl Anderson, who reported fantasies that matched The Torturer's methods exactly. Authorities are now asking the public to inform police if they know of Carl Anderson's whereabouts. Do not approach the suspect, as he should be considered armed and dangerous. Sources within the police department are telling me they are also concerned because their informant can no longer be located. Department spokespersons have refused comment on this latest development. This is Jennifer Alben reporting for News Channel Five.
ETHAN: Carl Anderson ... Hmmm. Gym teacher tells the cops on you, and now the teacher can't be found. Okay Rosa, we have to find the school where that teacher worked.
ROSA: School and city district records are in the basement.
[she gets up]
ROSA: Follow me. Hopefully, this key will get us where we need to go.
[she unlocks the cage, as they make their way towards the Hamilton Reading Room on the same floor, where a book falls from the ceiling above them]
ROSA: What the hell's that?
[they stop, as strange noises can be heard coming from somewhere above them in the room]
ROSA: Sounds like an animal is crawling around up there ...
[they continue on, entering a darkened room]
ROSA: Looks like this is where the library suffered the most fire damage ... Okay, there should be a stairwell that leads down to the microfiche room.
[they look around for the stairs, then Ethan suddenly falls through a weak spot in the floor and lands awkwardly in the room below]
ETHAN: Ahhh!
[he slowly gets up]
ETHAN: Damn, that hurt ...
ROSA: [from off camera] Thomas, you okay down there?
ETHAN: Yeah, yeah ... busted my flashlight, though.
[he looks up through the whole and sees Rosa]
ROSA: Stay put. I thought I saw something down there in the dark. I'll be there in a minute.
[she walks off, then Ethan has another hallucination (another addict appears out of nowhere and attacks him), but he comes to and finds Rosa standing in front of him]
ROSA: Thomas ... Thomas, snap out of it!
[he walks over to her, but the barred doors won't open]
ROSA: Here, take my flashlight ... Make your way around to the doors on the other side. I'll let you in there.
[he turns around]
ROSA: Don't take too long. Standing in the dark without my flashlight makes me nervous.
[he makes his way through the stacks (as zombie-like creatures randomly pop up from behind the books and attack him), then sees Rosa on the other side of a collapsed portion of the floor]
ROSA: How convenient ... Okay, jump down and see if you can find your way back to the stairs. I'll go back this way.
[he jumps down into the hole]
ROSA: There's no way past this thing. Climb down to the next floor and I'll meet up with you down there.
[he eventually makes his way through the stacks (after killing more zombies and addicts) before meeting up with Rosa again]
ROSA: Jesus, Thomas, it took you long enough ...
[they walk off, seeing another barred room where the addicts and zombies are fighting each other]
ROSA: Jesus, this is getting out of hand ... We need to get this microfiche information and get out of here.
[they start climbing down a flight of stairs]
ROSA: You mind taking the lead through this area?
[they enter a room, as Ethan begins looking through the various microfiche drawers]
ETHAN: Eight years ago would put the kid and the teacher at the same school in 1997 ...
[he stops at one drawer]
ETHAN: Here it is.
[cut to Rosa sitting down at the microfiche reader, as Ethan looks over her shoulder (and Rosa's kidnapper spies on them from the shadows)]
ROSA: "Anderson, Carl" ... There's a lot of Carl Andersons, but I bet this is our guy. He was enrolled, or sentenced, to an educational rehabilitation center for the severely troubled. Saint Joseph's Secondary on Northeast Fifty-second and Fremont. It's been closed for five years, and no wonder, that's one of the worst parts of town.
[cut to a closeup of Rosa's face]
ROSA: Christ, the cops have just been letting it go to hell for years ...
ETHAN: And what about the faculty?
ROSA: Doesn't list occupations, just a list of names. I'll take it back to the lab and see what I can find.
[they hear some rustling off camera, and finally notice the man spying on them (as he runs off)]
ROSA: It's him! He's been listening to us!
ETHAN: It looks like we've attracted other unwanted attention ...
[he fights off the squatters/addicts that come pouring into the microfiche room]
ROSA: Thomas, the exit ... We need to make a run for it!
[they head for the door, then she stops]
ROSA: What about our Serial Killer X?
ETHAN: He's got the same information we do, and that means he's also gonna go to the school ... Perhaps I can catch two killers with one net.
ROSA: I'll drive you there, then head back to HQ and work on that faculty list.

---

From wikipedia.org:

Condemned: Criminal Origins (known in Japan as Condemned: Psycho Crime and in Europe and Australia simply as Condemned) is a psychological horror video game, developed by Monolith Productions and published by Sega. It was launched worldwide in 2005 on the Xbox 360, with a Microsoft Windows version released later in 2006. The Windows version had few changes from the console version.

The game uses a first person perspective. Condemned: Criminal Origins places an added emphasis on melee combat and puzzle solving, including searching for fingerprints and gathering evidence.

Setting
Condemned: Criminal Origins is set in the fictional American City of Metro. The player takes on the role of Ethan Thomas, a crime scene investigation agent with the FBI's Serial Crime Unit, as he traverses the seedier sides of the city. His journey takes him through a number of condemned buildings as he searches for the one who framed him for murder, the evasive Serial Killer X. Along the way, Ethan must use his investigative intuition and technology to examine evidence left behind by SKX, all the while fighting off the violently psychotic denizens of Metro City, who seem to be driven to such madness by a mysterious, yet seemingly extraneous force.

Characters
The game's protagonist is Ethan Thomas (voiced by Greg Grunberg), an SCU investigator with unusually acute investigative instincts. He also is stated to have superhuman durability, as demonstrated by his ability to recover quickly from electrocution, long falls, and blunt trauma to the head, among others. He is aided in his investigations by Rosa, a forensics investigator at headquarters.

The primary antagonist of the game is Serial Killer X, who is hunting the serial killers that Ethan is searching for, killing them by the methods that they themselves use. Near the end of the game, he is revealed to be Leland Vanhorn, nephew of Ethan's friend Malcolm. Malcolm believes that Leland is being influenced by mysterious mutilated humanoid creatures that are causing an increase in insanity throughout the city. These creatures are more fully explained in the sequel as being related to the cult known as the Oro.

Plot
The game begins with the protagonist, SCU agent Ethan Thomas, arriving at the scene of a murder. He and his fellow officers go into an abandoned building that is surrounded by psychopaths and criminals. The crime scene they investigate is one of a young woman. She is on the floor with strangulation wounds, sitting across a table from a male mannequin. Ethan, along with his colleagues, agree that the murder was most likely committed by the Match Maker, a serial killer that Ethan has been investigating. After they collect evidence from the scene, one of the officers smells cigarette smoke. Believing that the smoke must be coming from their suspect, they decide to split up and go after him. While searching for the suspect, Ethan tries to restore power from an electrical box. Due to an electrical surge, Ethan is shocked, and drops to the floor, causing his weapon to be thrown from his hand. A man hiding in the shadows takes it and flees. Ethan manages to chase the man into a small, dead-end room, where the man holds Ethan at gunpoint and tells him they have the similar goals. Ethan's colleagues enter the room and tell the man to drop his weapon, and are promptly shot by the man with Ethan's gun, who then shoves Ethan out a window onto the street.

Ethan wakes in his apartment with Malcolm Vanhorn, a friend of Ethan's father, at his side. Malcolm warns Ethan that he is wanted for the deaths of the two officers who were shot with Ethan's gun. Ethan is determined to prove his innocence, although his own sanity appears to be slipping, as throughout the game he suffers numerous horrific visions.

---

From wikia.com:

The Metro City Library is a location in "Condemned: Criminal Origins", in Metro City. Ethan Thomas meets up with Rosa Angel to do some investigating on the Torturer, aka, Carl Andersen, using the library computer terminals . Rosa is captured and later released by an unseen Oro assailant during the course of their tour of the library, which is closed due to a fire. She is later found and rescued by Ethan, and they continue their investigation, which leads them to a Secondary School.

Its address is 262 Main Street.

---

From gamefaqs.com:

Chapter 07 - Metro City Library

Enter the lobby of the abandoned library. There's a BIRD0701 lying on the reception desk. Head further down the East Wing and use the elevator at the end of this hallway. Out of the elevator go left past the administration desk till you run into Rosa. Check your folder, grab the upgraded Taser and follow Rosa to where she finds a Master Key. Go to the end of the office to your left, forge a makeshift weapon out of the broken paper cutter, and head back after the scary stuff. Climb through the broken window and follow Rosa into the opposite office. In here, use the computer, then head out and right into the corridor.

Open a pair of double doors on your right and follow the corridor to some movable desks, on of which holds BIRD0702. When proceeding, you will be prompted to INVESTIGATE droplets in front of a fireaxeable door. Now head to the end of the hallway to find your first METALPIECE0701 for this chapter behind a movable crate of books. While heading back, a hobo will tear down a door in front of you with a fireaxe. Follow him and keep an eye out for a flapping BIRD0703 under some file cabinets next to where a hobo with a gun will shot at you. Make out the guy with the fireaxe hiding amongst the movable stacks and grab it off his dead hands. Now head back to where you found the droplets and use your fireaxe on the door. Inside will be one of the server racks; get the crowbar from within it.

Out of this room, take a right and 2 times left to find a closed grilled door. Pry it open with the crowbar and get on the elevator. There will be armed and dangerous book readers in the lobby by now, so be careful. After you're done, grab the crowbar off the reception desk and head to the beginning of this chapter to find another grilled and closed door. There's the BIRDBATHTV in here. Back in the lobby make out the large painting and pry open any of the doors next to it. Head upstairs and into a large reading room. Find a rotting BIRD0704 with a sledgehammer next to it with the gasspectrometer. Grab the sledgehammer and smash away the padlock on a ladder on the right wall of this room.

Push the ladder over to the correct spot and climb it up to find another BIRD0705. Now jump down to where Rosa is lying on the floor. After her successful uber-hacking-attempt follow her all the way to a burned room with racks and books in it. When you reach a small area from where you can see the 2nd floor with the large book room from earlier, look left to find METALPIECE0702 behind a crate of books. Make your way around the burned racks till you fall through the rotted floorboards.

After cleaning your pants, get around the book shelves. When you reach the gap with Rosa standing on the other side, jump down and continue past the neverending stacks. At sometime a crawler will come climbing out of the ceiling. There oughtta be a BIRD0706 lying on a table next to him. The following area will be quite dangerous with a lot of shooting. Try staying in cover till the hobos run out of ammunition. Then check out the room they came out of to find METALPIECE0703 behind one of the desks. Out of this room, head left to meet up with Rosa. Follow her to some stairs and head down into the microfiche room. After you got the intel, kill off some addicts and wait for Rosa to leave her safeplace. Run after her to end this chapter.

Case Study No. 1462: Clark Ashton

The Real Ghostbusters 232 The Collect Call of Cathulhu
20:27
When the Necronomicon is stolen from the public library, the Ghostbusters find themselves fighting creatures in the sewers, chasing down cults, and researching comic books to help them in their mission.
Tags: comedy tv comedy tv shows comedy tv series comedy tv shows full episodes ghostbusters ghostbusters tv ghostbusters animated animated ghostbusters animated tv ghostbusters animated intro ghostbusters animated series ghostbusters animated theme ghostbusters animated cartoon ghostbusters animated episode ghostbusters theme kids tv animated tv shows animated tv series best animated tv shows
Added: 10 months ago
From: Ghostbusters Animated
Views: 25,338

[scene opens in the New York Public Library after hours, as male librarian (brown hair, pencil thin moustache, brown suit, blue pants) and an older male professor (balding with grey hair, glasses, green sweater, brown undershirt, blue pants) look at an ancient book on display in a glass case]
TED KLEIN: I tell you, Ashton ... No good can come of this! Putting the Necronomicon on display like this is, is dangerous!
CLARK ASHTON: Nonsense, Klein! Maybe up in Arkham, they still believe in spooks, but here in the big city we're a bit more ... sophisticated. Your precious book of spells will be quite safe here.
[he puts his arm around the professor and winks]
CLARK ASHTON: I assure you.

[...]

[after the Necronomicon is stolen, the Ghostbusters arrive at the library to investigate]
TED KLEIN: Thank heaven you've come! I'm Professor Ted Klein from Miskatonic University in Arkham. And, uh, this is Clark Ashton, in charge of the exhibit.
CLARK ASHTON: I'm sure there's no reason to be alarmed. No doubt someone just stole the book for ransom.
[Egon inspects some seawood on the broken display case, taking out his PKE meter]
EGON SPENGLER: I'm getting high paranormal readings ...
TED KLEIN: We must get it back! Otherwise the city, perhaps even the world, is in grave peril!
PETER VENKMAN: I don't see what all the fuss is about ... It's just a book!
RAY STANTZ: And an atomic bomb is just a couple of rocks slammed together ...

[...]

[after defeating Cathulhu, the Ghostbusters are surrounded by cult members ... until the police arrive and arrest them]
PETER VENKMAN: Better late than never ...
[cut to the cult leader (wearing long purple robes and an octopus-like mask) being held by two policemen, as Winston walks up and pulls off his mask]
PETER VENKMAN: Gasp!
RAY STANTZ: Clark Ashton ...
[cut to a closeup of the librarian's angry face]
RAY STANTZ: [from off camera] Boy, you can't trust anybody!
CLARK ASHTON: Fools! You may have won this time, but Cathulhu cannot be destroyed! He waits and dreams in the deep, and the cities of man shall fall before him!
PETER VENKMAN: Yeah yeah, sure ... Book him, boys!

---

From imdb.com:

The Real Ghost Busters: Season 2, Episode 32
The Collect Call of Cathulhu (27 Oct. 1987)

It is almost 6 pm at the New York City Public Library. Professor Ted Klein was very nervous. He didn't like having the Necronomicon on public display. Clark Ashton, an official with the library, reassured him the book was safe. After Ashton locked up the room, something broke in from outside. A security guard checked the room, saw the Necronomicon was gone, and ran into a creature. The guard fainted.

The next morning, the Ghostbusters are huddled at the kitchen table reading the Sunday newspaper. Ray is excited and read a headline to everyone. From Monday to Friday, the New York City Public Library planned to exhibit the Necronomicon. Egon explained to Winston it was the single most powerful book of spells ever written. Ray theorized with glee the book's copyright page alone must have a P.K.E. valence of 9.9. Peter shifted the discussion to his date. Meanwhile downstairs, Janine answered a phone call just as Peter's date arrived. Egon took the call as Peter introduced Candy to everyone. However, Egon relented the date would have to wait. He believed there was a Class 7 Corporeal Entity at the library.

The Ghostbusters met with Klein and Ashton. Klein is visibly terrified while Ashton was the exact opposite. Ashton chalked up the theft to a ransom attempt. Egon pulled out his P.K.E. Meter and confirmed a high paranormal reading. Klein is even more alarmed and pleaded with the Ghostbusters to get the book back as soon as possible. The world was at stake. As the guys followed Egon outside, he explained the book was the only English translation of the Necronomicon and if its spells were read out loud, the results would be catastrophic. The spells acted like sonic keys that could open portals to other dimensions where the Old Ones waited to take over the Earth. Egon especially noted Cathulhu made Gozer look like Little Mary Sunshine. They stopped at a sewer manhole and climbed down.

The Ghostbusters are quickly surrounded by Spawn of Cathulhu (and rats). The Proton Streams had a temporary effect and the spawn regenerated their missing body parts. Ray adapted and shot into the water to create steam. The guys used the diversion to escape the sewers. Peter held them off but lost his left boot. Ray slammed the manhole cover down on one of the spawn. Back at the Firehouse, Ray confirmed the entities were Spawn of Cathulhu while Winston and Peter recuperated. Egon thought as much but is still worried, as the spawn probably served a cult. Ray revealed the stars had to be in a certain alignment in order for Cathulhu to be raised from the ocean floor. Peter correctly guessed the stars were in alignment that night.

Egon proposed they seek out Alice Derleth from Miskatonic University in order to gather as much information on the Cult of Cathulu. While Ray and Winston looked up the Book of Dzyan and Pnakotic Manuscripts, Egon and Peter took a plane trip to Arkham, Massachusetts. They met with Alice outside Miskatonic's administration building and talked over at the campus cafeteria. Alice was concerned and declared she was going back with them to New York. Everyone gathered outside of Wagner's Occult Shop in East Greenwich Village. They heard chanting from the basement and raided the cult. However, the cult leader summoned a Shuggoth. It grabbed the Ghostbusters and Alice. Luckily, Alice spellcasted and turned the entity to stone.

Back at square one, Ray proposed they visit an old acquaintance to seek out his collection of old pulp magazines. After several hours, Alice found the Weird Tales issue, and Ray confirmed it was the one that revealed how to defeat Cathulhu. Per Egon's calculations, Ecto-1 was headed to Coney Island on the southern tip of Brooklyn. It was the best place to summon Cathulhu. However, the Ghostbusters ran into some car trouble. Peter neglected to rotate the tires and they had no spares. The Ghostbusters took the subway to Coney Island but they were too late. The cult summoned Cathulhu. The Ghostbusters switch to full stream but it had no effect. Neither did Alice's spell. Cathulhu's power was completely off the scale and none of the equipment stood a chance to stop him.

Alice reminded Ray about the comic book. Ray skimmed the story and revealed Cathulhu was lured to an electric plant and blasted with 100 giga volts of electricity. Egon peered at Astroland's Cyclone roller coaster and came up with a strategy. If they used their equipment to ionize the metal's superstructure, they could attract a lightning bolt. Peter elected to ride the roller coaster and lure in Cathulhu. After Peter fell to safety, the Ghostbusters electrified the tracks. A lightning bolt struck Cathulhu. He melted into a red vapor and drifted into the sky. The cult was angered and was about to attack when the police arrived. Winston stepped forward and unmasked the cult leader. It was Clark Ashton!

Back at the Firehouse, Alice volunteered to take the Necronomicon back to Miskatonic University with her. Peter convinced her to stay a few days though she took charge again and suggested they see the exhibit of the Eltdown Shards at the Natural History Museum and a lecture on the Zanthu Tablets at Columbia University. Peter walked with her and attempted to suggest a nice restaurant.

---

From wikia.com:

Clark Ashton was a librarian but secretly led the Cult of Cathulhu.

Appeared in: "The Collect Call of Cathulhu" (Real Ghostbusters)
Played by: Frank Welker

History
Clark Ashton is an official of the New York City Public Library by day and by night, he leads the Cult of Cathulhu, a secret society that worships the Old One known as Cathulhu. During a rare alignment of stars, Ashton was placed in charge of an exhibit of the Necronomicon, a book of spells with the power to summon forth Cathulhu. He finished setting up the exhibit on the Saturday before the public display and left with Ted Klein, of Miskatonic University, after 6 o'clock. A Spawn of Cathulhu under the control of the Cult then stole the tome.

On Sunday, Ashton and the Cult gathered at Wagner's Occult Shop with the Necronomicon. Their meeting was interrupted by the Ghostbusters and Alice Derleth. Ashton managed to escape with the book. However, Cathulhu was defeated by the Ghostbusters and the Cult was arrested by the police. Ashton was unmasked by Winston Zeddemore. As the police hauled him way, Ashton spouted out that this was not the end of Cathulhu and he would return.

Trivia
* Clark's name is a reference to Clark Ashton Smith, a major Cthulhu Mythos writer.
* Clark's tirade, as he is being hauled away by the police, is a reference to H.P. Lovecraft's "The Call of Cthulhu."

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Case Study No. 1461: Dorothy "DJ" Jarrow

Mini Book Review Love Overdue by Pamela Morsi
3:06
Join me on goodreads!
good reads.com/wordienerd

Say hi on twitter @wordienerd

Stumble over to tumblr and say howdy: wordienerd.tum blr.com

Friend me on Facebook! face book.com/wordienerd
Tags: books booktube book tube word book review review
Added: 7 months ago
From: wordienerd
Views: 30

[scene opens with a young woman speaking directly to the camera]
COOKIE: Hi there, I am Cookie with Wordie Nerd, and it's guilty pleasure time! Yay!
[she holds up a copy of Pamela Morsi's "Love Overdue"]
COOKIE: Another one ... Um, this is Pamela Morsi's "Love Overdue," although this is a little mini-review, because this is just ...
[she shrugs]
COOKIE: A light and fluffy relaxing beach-y style read. Not that we're in beach season, but maybe you're cool and you go on cruises.
[she moves the book closer to the camera]
COOKIE: Or maybe you just wanna escape ... Maybe you just don't wanna over-think.
[she laughs]
COOKIE: I dunno, it was cute. Um, so this is a story ... I don't even remember her name. How sad is that?
[she looks at the cover]
COOKIE: It's DJ ... DJ.
[she holds the book up to the camera again]
COOKIE: DJ, um, is sort of this quiet mousey ... literally, librarian. Who gets a job offer, and she moves to this town to become said librarian of a cast full of colorful, very colorful characters.
[she laughs]
COOKIE: Um, I love the people in the library in the town, let's start there. Um, the characters were just so well-developed. You sorta fall in love with them, even the ones you don't like, because you're like, "Aw, I can't stand you! But I like you! Because I can't stand you!"
[she waves the book around]
COOKIE: Um, but that's only really one person you can't stand in the book, and you're supposed to not be able to stand that person ...
[she looks at the book]
COOKIE: So, there she is. Um, she gets the job. Her boss, I guess ... or the person that hired her, um, lets her rent out--
[she motions with her left hand]
COOKIE: I guess the room above hers. She has, like, a big house and she's lonely. And this lady's like, "Oh, I'm so used to being alone, I don't know if I'm going to like this!" Um, she has a cute little dog, DJ, and the dog sorta has a story of his own the whole way through it.
[she laughs]
COOKIE: He's really cute! Um, and so lonely house owner sorta wants to befriend her, but she has mischievous undertones to her, which you will find out ... in a good way! Um, and we can just surmise that it's because of her son! Her son is lonely as well, but he's sort of rebuking love, he wants nothing to do with it and he wants his, y'know, steady bachelorhood.
[she smiles]
COOKIE: Um, we have an interesting twist! We have an interesting twist with these two's past, which you won't find out really until the end, and I don't wanna spoil any of that because it's really cute!
[she looks at the book]
COOKIE: Um, but ... this book was really really cute. She starts fixing up the library, she starts sort of ingraining herself into the community. So it gives her a sense of home, which she really really didn't have up until this stage. So, I always like books like that! Like, "Oh, I'm all alone in the world, but now I belong!"
[she laughs]
COOKIE: So this will satiate that appetite, if you have the same desires ... um, from this style of book.
[she looks at the book]
COOKIE: Happiness all around ... Um, cute story, great characters. I loved it from start to finish, and it was one of those "gobble in one sittings" also. Um, I'm going to highly recommend it!
[she laughs]
COOKIE: I think I got it on sale ...
[she looks at the cover]
COOKIE: It's seven-ninety-nine, but I think I got it at Target for that, like, twenty percent off so ... Spring for it!
[she shakes the book in front of the camera]
COOKIE: Bah! What is it again?
[she looks at the cover]
COOKIE: "Love Overdue" ... Aw, it's so cute!
[she puts the book down]
COOKIE: Alright, I'll see you next time!
[she waves to the camera]
COOKIE: Bye!

---

From amazon.com:

Love Overdue
by Pamela Morsi

Mass Market Paperback: 432 pages
Publisher: Harlequin MIRA (August 27, 2013)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0778315371
ISBN-13: 978-0778315377

Meet Dorothy Jarrow: devotedly unsexy librarian

Buttoned-up book lover DJ is all sensible shoes, drab skirts and studious glasses. After an ill-advised spring-break-fueled fling left her mortified, she's committed to her prim and proper look. When she's hired by a rural library in middle-of-nowhere Kansas, she finally has the lifestyle to match - and she can't wait to get her admin on.

But it's clear from day one that the small-town library is more interested in circulating rumors than books. DJ has to organize her unloved library, win over oddball employees and avoid her flamboyant landlady's attempts to set her up with the town pharmacist. Especially that last part - because it turns out handsome Scott Sanderson is her old vacation fling! She is not sure whether to be relieved or offended when he doesn't seem to recognize her. But with every meeting, DJ finds herself secretly wondering what it would be like to take off her glasses, unpin her bun and reveal the inner vixen she's been hiding from everyone - including herself.

---

From americanlibrariesmagazine.org:

Dorothy Jarrow, aka D.J., leaves her job working for the director from hell to accept a position as director of a small Kansas library. The building, a beautiful Carnegie library, is dark, dated, and disorganized. It comes with a motley crew: Amos, the depressed bookmobile driver; James, a silent young man with Asperger's syndrome who has an unsettling ability to disappear into the stacks; Suzy, a perky clerk; and seriously disgruntled Amelia Grundler. Fortunately, D.J. doesn't have to worry about housing right away because the library board chair, Viv Sanderson, has offered her a room in her home. But Viv has plans for D.J. that have nothing to do with the library: Viv wants a wife for her pharmacist son, Scott. The now buttoned-up D.J., however, recognizes him as the man with whom she shared a hot, one-night stand years ago. Morsi provides lots of humor, including library-specific jokes, such as Dewey Decimal–based chapter headings ("129.9 Origin and Destiny of Individual Souls"). In this nearly perfect snapshot of a close-knit, gossipy, rural town at wheat-harvest time, former librarian Morsi once again proves that she is one of romance's top authors.

---

From publishersweekly.com:

As charming and sunny as the summer days it describes, Morsi's librarian romance crafts the staple elements of the genre with verve and a sure hand. The details may not be terribly plausible, but neither are they treated as perfunctory. Dorothy DJ Jarrow has finally landed her dream job as the administrator of a tiny public library system in rural Kansas. The gossipy, sometimes vindictive realities of smalltown life first startle her and then steel her determination to succeed. What she can't seem to brace herself against is her landlady's son, Scott the hot guy Sanderson, a mild-mannered pharmacist with a surprising alter ego as the dirty secret from DJ's past. He doesn't remember their encounter-at least consciously. But fate, Scott's mother, and a smart terrier named Melvil Dewey Jr. will help the two renew their connection. Morsi delivers a satisfying beach read with gentle humor and quirky, vivid characters.

---

From barnesandnoble.com:

021.1 Library Relationships

Through the windshield of her aging Chevy hatchback, Dorothy gazed across the yellow poppy fields toward the Emerald City. Of course, the poppy fields were more accurately described as "amber waves of grain" and the visible tower on the distant horizon was a grain elevator rather than a wizard's dwelling, but she couldn't have felt more caught up in an unlikely fantasy. She was eager, excited, out of her comfort zone.

Dorothy Jarrow, D.J. to her friends, had been waiting for her chance since grad school. Six years is a short time, people assured her. A very short time, in an era of tight budgets and declining community commitment, for a public library administrator to find her own institution to manage. For most of her colleagues, simply maintaining employment was challenge enough. But inexplicably and sight unseen, D.J. had been plucked from her obscure job as collections assistant (aka gofer to the boss from Hell) and offered the position to head a tiny but thriving library system in Verdant, Kansas. It was as unlikely a scenario as a tornado trip to the Land of Oz.

"We're almost there, Dew," she told the small black terrier with his pink-and-black nose inching through the wires of the crate. "It's a clean slate in a brand-new life."

Three weeks ago, D.J. had never even heard of the place. Verdant, pronounced by the locals with the emphasis on the dant, had been simply another anonymous, inconspicuous, unremarkable small town. But after today, it would be home. A place D.J. had been searching for her whole life.

As she neared the town, she eased up on the gas pedal, forcing herself to maintain the pace of the speed limit. Not merely because all her worldly possessions were packed into a rental trailer she was towing behind her. But also, eagerness notwithstanding, small-town librarians were expected to be law-abiding, as well as sedate, slightly stuffy and incredibly sexless. D.J. was pretty certain she fit that bill perfectly.

She had dressed for the occasion in regulation gray, including low-heeled practical pumps, wearing her eyeglasses and with her dark brown hair neatly tamed and tied back at the nape of her neck.

"That part of Kansas is one of the most conservative places in the country," her former roommate, Terri, had pointed out.

"Then I should fit in very well," she'd answered.

There was a hesitation on the end of the phone line. "D.J., just be yourself," she advised.

Terri always said things like that. And D.J. always discounted such advice. It was all well and good for other people, like Terri, to follow her inclinations. But D.J. had found circumspection and reticence could be very comforting lifestyle choices.

However, none of the careful restraint she'd professed was in evidence as she reached the tiny town that was to become the center of her universe. She was almost giddy with excitement. Past the roadside gas stations, she immediately recognized the Brazier Grill. She'd seen it on Google Earth, of course. She'd been glued to the internet for days learning all she could about her new locale. And although officially there seemed to be nine commercial eating establishments, the Brazier was the only place in town that had an actual restaurant review (three stars). Beyond it were several metal buildings with business names like Avery Pipe, Gun-ther Fencing and Vern's Seed and Tractor.

D.J. slowed as she came to the small incline where the road crossed the collection of railroad tracks of the Burlington Northern & Santa Fe. Off to her left, the giant grain elevator loomed, casting a long afternoon shadow across the entrance to the main part of town.

This was where she was going to live. This was the community where she would plant her life. And she secretly vowed that the people who gave her this chance would never have cause to regret it.

Along the street she passed neat rows of houses, all vintage, well kept, many with porch swings, flowers in the yard, evidence of love and care.

"Plenty of places to run around here, Dew," she announced. "No more cramped apartment and crowded dog park for you."

The elegant arches of St. Luke's Methodist with its gothic spire reaching toward heaven seemed to divide the residential community from the commercial one. With angled parking and a spattering of traffic lights, D.J. thought downtown Verdant was adorably picturesque. The two-story brick and masonry buildings lined each side, some fancifully ornate and others stodgily square. On the second corner a triangular sign extended out over the sidewalk rather gaudily declaring itself the Ritz Theatre. The marquee read Movie Nights: Friday and Saturday.

D.J. spotted two banks, a hardware store, a bakery, appliance sales and a pharmacy. There was something called Flea Heaven in a building that still proudly proclaimed its earlier incarnation as Kress Five & Dime. She was glancing into the bright windows of the florist shop and nearly missed her turn. The library was on Government Street, just past the corner fire station, the 1960s turquoise city hall and the former territorial jail, still in use.

She pulled both car and tow into an empty parking spot right in front of the building and gazed at the gorgeous classical red brick with oversize concrete columns and a triangular pediment that drew the eye to the modest dome. D.J. sighed aloud. It was a Carnegie, of course. Andrew Carnegie, the billionaire philanthropist of the Gilded Age, had been a great believer in the power of the public library. He'd erected them everywhere, in every corner of the country. And this one, this one, D.J. was sure, had been built just for her.

"Perfect," she said aloud. "Perfect library, perfect town, perfect future. Way to go, Dorothy!"

She gathered up her self-congratulation and her purse and got out of the car. Though she wasn't actually starting her new job until tomorrow, D.J. just couldn't wait to see the place. She opened the back door and released Dew from his captivity. The little dog immediately raced to the patch of green lawn beneath a nearby tree and did a quick spritz before dutifully hurrying back for his leash. D.J. clipped the hook on his collar.

"Dogs do not belong in libraries," she reminded him. "I won't be long and I expect you to be good."

D.J. twisted the leash handle around the lowest limb of the tree. Dew had already spread out on the ground, happily decapitating a stick that he'd found.

D.J. climbed the steps, her heart pounding in anticipation. The opportunity had truly been out of the blue. She'd been checking her email at lunch break and there it was, an inquiry from her posted resume. The first inquiry in the two years since it had been up. D.J. had almost forgotten that it was there. And the email was so incredible, so unexpected, she'd almost deleted it as spam.

She'd committed the text to memory.

After examining your credentials, the members of the board would like to offer you the position of Librarian for Verdant Independent Regional Library. We have a 70,000 volume collection inclusive of the Main library and two bookmobiles. You will be supervising four fulltime staff. Competitive salary, benefits. Housing provided. Please contact us immediately.

D.J. had read over it a dozen times before the words sank in. She was being hired. No interview, no consideration of other candidates, no nothing.

She had called to say "yes" before she even finished lunch. She'd given her notice less than an hour later. And now she was here. Finally, finally here, D.J. thought to herself. She had her own library in her own town.

It took some strength to open the building's heavy oversize door. That immediately had her wondering about handicap access. Once inside the stuffy, airless foyer, access became the least of her worries. The building was dark and worn, with the distinctive odor of cellulose decay. The smell of old books could be wonderful, but the acids that eat up paper are as devastating to a library as a fire, and this place smelled rife with them.

D.J. took a couple of steps inside, allowing her eyes to become accustomed to the dim light. In the shelves to her left she caught a glimpse of a man in the shadows, who immediately disappeared into the stacks.

The place was eerie, spooky, unwelcoming. Outside it had been all Andrew Carnegie. Inside it was all Tim Burton.

The main desk was a curved dais fronting a two-level, limited-access book collection behind wrought iron bars. The woman seated at the desk was a bit pudgy and probably fiftysomething, D.J. surmised. She was wearing a garish orange sweater that was easily the brightest thing in the room. And she was looking directly at D.J. Or, more accurately, she was glaring at her.

D.J. made a mental note to stress friendliness at her very first staff meeting. Leading by example, she put on a gracious smile as she stepped forward.

"Hello," she said quietly. "I'm Dorothy Jarrow, the new librarian."

Somewhere behind her a book slammed loudly closed. The unexpected sound in the hushed library made her jump. D.J. recovered herself quickly and offered another smile to the woman behind the desk.

"I know exactly who you are," the woman replied. Her tone was almost openly rude. She continued her task, which seemed to consist of putting address labels on postcards.

When the woman didn't volunteer her own name, D.J. requested it.

"I am Amelia Grundler," she declared with such ad-amancy that she obviously expected D.J. to know it. When she did not, the woman added, "I am the librarian."

D.J. managed not to drop her jaw on the floor, but her smile did waver. "I?I understood that the librarian had?died."

"Miss Popplewell died six years ago," Miss Grun-dler said. "But the old woman hadn't darkened the door to this place in more than a decade. All that time I've been here, the acting librarian. Now they go and hire some?some.. " The woman was looking D.J. up and down. "Someone else," she finished.

"I see."

D.J. was mentally gathering up a strategy. New on the job was like being the new kid in school. It always took time to fit in, and more so when your presence was going to displace someone else. She could go with blaming the board, but she wasn't sure, as an outsider, if risking more dissention wasn't worse. Or she could beg for help, pointing out how much the woman's experience and expertise was needed. But at first glance, Amelia Grundler didn't seem to be the type to be won over by teamwork.

D.J. had just begun to consider option three, authoritarian threat, when the main door swung open letting in a broad shaft of light and a white-haired, middle-aged woman dressed in elegant purple pinstripes and a fluffy scarf of violet hues.

"Oh, it is you, it is you," the entrant said excitedly. "When I saw that moving trailer with the Texas license tag, I said, that's got to be our girl." She rushed forward and grabbed D.J. by the hand, as if they were dear friends. "But you shouldn't have come here first. I was expecting you at the house."

"I wanted to see the library."

"Not before you get settled in," the purple person corrected her. "Believe me, you'll get all the time you can bear in this dreary old place. I'm sure I do."

The woman waved away her surroundings with denunciation.

"But where are my manners! I haven't even introduced myself. I am, of course, Vivian Sanderson."

D.J. had spoken to the head of the library board on the phone. "It's nice to meet you in person."

"We are going to be such friends," the small woman predicted. "I'm also your landlady. Come, come. Let me get you out of this drab, dusty old place." The small powerhouse began herding D.J. toward the door.

D.J. made some effort to resist. After all, this so-called "drab, dusty old place" was her dream job, her future.

"I really wanted to tour the building," she argued.

Mrs. Sanderson tutted and shook her head. "Tomorrow is soon enough for that," she said. "This place has been here since dirt was the new thing and it will be exactly the same when hell freezes over. Besides, I'm sure your staff is not ready for you. They'll want to make their best first impression."

D.J. was already fairly certain that if Miss Grundler was any indication, her employees weren't going to be all that happy to see her at all.

The feisty woman had managed to steer her all the way to the door. She huffed a little as she tried to push it open. D.J. had no alternative but to assist.

"Goodbye, Amelia," Mrs. Sanderson said with a little wave toward the front desk. More loudly she directed a call toward the stacks. "Goodbye, James!"

Once outside in the sunlight, the woman paused to look D.J. over from head to toe. "Oh, yes, aren't you lovely," she said. "Taller than I expected, but rather prettier than your LinkedIn photo. Though gray is not your color, dear. Pink, I'm thinking, but not pastel, more a deep rose."

D.J. never wore pink, neither rose nor pastel, and she didn't intend to start. "Mrs. Sanderson, I."

"Oh, please, call me Viv, everybody does. And what should I call you? Dorothy? Dot? Dottie?"

D.J. would have expected the members of the library board to call her Ms. Jarrow.

"My friends call me D.J.," she heard herself saying.

"D.J." Viv tried it out on her tongue. "I like that. Very cheerful and peppy. Yes, let's definitely go with that."

Flashing a broad smile she began hurrying toward the street.

As they walked toward the car, Dew spotted them and began making excited circles in anticipation of being on the go once more.

"Is this your dog?"

"Yes."

Viv nodded. "He's not too large. I'm sure he'll be fine."

Fine for what, D.J. wasn't sure. She'd made it very clear to Mrs. Sanderson that she had a pet. She hoped that her "provided housing" would definitely accommodate that.

Viv's car, parked directly in front of D.J., was a Mini Cooper convertible in the exact same shade of purple as her suit.

D.J. gathered up Dew's leash and put him back inside his crate. She tossed the leash on the passenger seat beside her and she hurried to follow the older woman.

With the top of her convertible down, Mrs. Sanderson's scarf flapping in the breeze a la Isadora Duncan was hard to miss. And though the distance had several turns, which led to the edge of town and left streets for blacktop, her speedometer never got above twenty miles per hour.

When the purple Mini turned into the driveway of a gorgeous two-story Queen Anne, D.J. pulled in behind it with some trepidation. She had pictured her furnished housing as a second-floor walk-up in a taupe-colored stucco apartment complex. This place was not that. D.J. was fairly certain that the residence was Viv's own. The lavender paint color with eggplant trim was a dead giveaway.

Case Study No. 1460: California Morning "Lucy" Whipple

Ballad of Lucy Whipple - April 7th 10p ET
0:31
Ballad of Lucy Whipple - April 7th 10p ET
Tags: brightcove
Added: 1 year ago
From: inspirationtvnetwork
Views: 25

From rottentomatoes.com:

The Ballad of Lucy Whipple (2001)

Set in 1850s California (but actually filmed in Utah), this made-for-TV movie features Jena Malone as title character Lucy Whipple. The emphasis, however, is on Lucy's "mule-stubborn" mother Arvella Whipple (Glenn Close), who defies 19th century sexual stereotyping to try her luck as a gold prospector. Stuck in the ill-named California mining village of Lucky Diggins, Lucy is convinced that her maw is a bit "tetched" in the head.

It takes a chance encounter in the nearby woods to show Lucy that perhaps Arvella is not as foolish as she seems, and that California is not the muddy hellhole that it appears to be at first glance.

Adapted from a novel by Karen Cushman, Golden Dreams: The Ballad of Lucy Whipple was first broadcast by CBS on February 18, 2001.

---

From sonymoviechannel.com:

Directed by: Jeremy Paul Kagan
Release year: 2001
Runtime: 120 Minutes

A recently widowed mother and her children learn to cope with rigors of the frontier in THE BALLAD OF LUCY WHIPPLE, a two-hour made-for-television movie distributed by Columbia TriStar International Television, a Sony Pictures Entertainment company.
For the prospectors of the California gold-rush town of Lucky Diggins, life is a difficult blur of desperation, cheap whiskey and cheaper women. But for Arvella Whipple (Glenn Close), a newly widowed mother of three, it is the perfect place to realize her dream of a new life on the frontier.
Unfortunately for her daughter, California Whipple (Jena Malone), the dream promises to be a hellish nightmare. The prospectors are all uncouth, illiterate barbarians and her mother is too busy running the town's only boarding house to realize how lonely and unhappy her daughter has become. But when her mother sends her on a reluctant foray into the woods to hunt for food, California encounters a desperately ragged girl who teaches her new ways to appreciate her new environment.
Determined to establish her own identity, California changes her name to Lucy and begins changing things for herself and those around her. She teaches her bedraggled friend to read, befriends a runaway slave and introduces him to the reluctant townsfolk, starts her own lending library for the miners and successfully defends a woman accused of killing her abusive husband.
Lucy faces her greatest challenge, however, when her rambunctious brother, Butte (Michael Welch), falls ill and dies, leaving Arvella helpless with depression. But when her mother eventually regains her vigor and decides to leave, Lucy realizes that she has become a vital part of the community and decides to stay in Lucky Diggins, where her heart has found its home.

---

From barnesandnoble.com:

Arvella Whipple and her three children, Sierra, Butte, and 11-year-old California Morning, make a fresh start in Lucky Diggins, a town of mud, tents, and rough-hewn residents. It's a far cry from Massachusetts; as her mother determinedly settles in, California rebelliously changes her name to Lucy and starts saving every penny for the trip back east.

Ever willing to lose herself in a book when she should be doing errands, Lucy is an irresistible teenager; her lively narration and stubborn, slightly naive self-confidence (as well as a taste for colorful invective: "Gol durn, rip-snortin' rumhole and cussed, dad-blamed, dag diggety, thundering pisspot," she storms) recall the narrator of Catherine, Called Birdy (1994), without seeming as anachronistic. Other characters are drawn with a broader brush, a shambling platoon of unwashed miners with hearts (and in one case, teeth) of gold.

Arvella eventually moves on, but Lucy has not only lost her desire to leave California, but found a vocation as well: town librarian.

---

From imdb.com:

California Morning 'Lucy' Whipple: You were right, Mama. You told me to follow my heart, and my heart is yelling at me to stay so... I'm staying here, in god-forsaken burn-out washed-up Lucky Diggins.
[crowd cheers]
California Morning 'Lucy' Whipple: And we're gonna need a library, because that's my heart's desire so... I'm stayin' put.
Arvella Whipple: My goodness, but you are mule-stubborn.
California Morning 'Lucy' Whipple: Just like you, Mama.
[she writes a letter as the townsfolk help build the Lucky Diggins Library (Est. 1851)]
California Morning 'Lucy' Whipple: Dear Mama, Clyde, and Prairie, we're rebuilding the town with a new boardinghouse and a real library. The miners all pay a dollar a month to run the library and pay me, the head librarian. We already have eighty one books. New folks arrive every week. I miss you all horribly, but you were right all along to bring us here, Mama. Thank you. Your loving daughter, Miss Lucy Whipple, librarian and hearts-contented citizen of Lucky Diggins. It's where things change everyday.