Case Study No. 0107: Bianca Burnette

Scream 3 (2000) - Being Gale Weathers
3:19
A funny scene from Scream 3. All rights to their owners.
Tags: Scream 3 Funny Scene Gale Weathers Hollywood Studio Archive Studio Courtney Cox Parker Posey Jennifer Jolie Carrie Fisher
Added: 7 months ago
From: WelcomeToVideodrome2
Views: 2,927

[Gale Weathers tries to enter the Sunrise Studios Archives building, but the door is locked]
GALE: [looking in the window] Hello?
[she reaches into her purse for a credit card to jimmy the lock, then jumps when Jennifer Jolie taps her shoulder from behind]
JENNIFER: Jeez ...
GALE: What the hell are you doing?
JENNIFER: Being Gale Weathers! What the hell are you doing?
GALE: I am Gale Weathers!
JENNIFER: Here's how I see it, I've got no house, no bodyguard, no movie, and I'm being stalked. Because someone wants to kill me? No, because someone wants to kill you! So now, starting now, I go where you go. That way, if someone wants to kill me, I'll be with you, and since they really want to kill you, they won't kill me ... they'll kill you. Make sense?
GALE: None!
JENNIFER: Y'know, in the movies, I play you as being much smarter.
GALE: And as a sane person! Hm, for you that must be quite a stretch!
JENNIFER: That's funny.
GALE: Ha!
JENNIFER: [whispers] Need to get in that building?
GALE: Yeah.
JENNIFER: There a story in that building?
GALE: Maybe.
JENNIFER: [holds up her security card] Gale Weathers ... would find a way.
[she swipes the card and unlocks the door]
GALE: [under her breath] Bitch ...
[Jennifer heads for the door, and Gale turns to her]
GALE: Alright, wait!
[she pushes her aside and enters first]
JENNIFER: [following her inside] Don't tell me what to do ...
[cut to Gale and Jennifer walking down a dark staircase]
JENNIFER: Basements, wow ... basements creep me out.
GALE: Make a fascinating interview ...
[they hear noises coming from behind a chain-link door]
GALE: Hello?
[they hear coughing coming from down the hall, and walk towards an open door, where they see the studio's archivist sitting at her desk]
GALE: [walking up to her and reaching into her purse] Hi. Excuse me, I am Gale Weathers, and I'm here researching with the police ...
[she places a photograph on her desk]
GALE: This photo. It was taken at the studio. Her name is Maureen Prescott. Back then it was probably Roberts.
[they suddenly notice that the archivist bears a striking resemblance to actress Carrie Fisher]
GALE: Hey, are you--
BIANCA: [coldly] No.
[they look around and see a photograph of a young Bianca Burnette on the wall]
JENNIFER: But you look just--
BIANCA: Like her? I've been hearing it all my life.
JENNIFER: It's uncanny!
BIANCA: I was up for Princess Leia. I was this close. So who gets it? The one who sleeps with George Lucas.
GALE: Uh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring up a sore subject for you.
BIANCA: Sure you didn't. No of 'em did ...
[she takes a drag off of her cigarette]
BIANCA: So how can I help you? Or do you want me to tell you who you look like?
GALE: Hm, how about some information on Maureen Roberts?
BIANCA: I don't work for the cops, sweetie. I work for the studio.
GALE: Really? Well, would you work for ...
[she puts a fifty dollar bill down on the table]
GALE: The President?
BIANCA: [she pushes the bill across the table towards Gale] The president ... of the studio.
JENNIFER: Fifty dollars? Who are you, a reporter for Woodsboro High?
[she takes off her ring and puts it on the table]
BIANCA: [exhales a puff of smoke into the air]
JENNIFER: It's worth two grand. Are you gonna help Gale Weathers or not?
[cut to Bianca opening a large filing cabinet, as the three stand in a room surrounded by old movie reels and card catalogs]
BIANCA: I know every face in here ... I got a respect for the unknown actor.
[camera zooms in on Bianca leafing through the various folders in the filing cabinet]
BIANCA: If they're looking for Maureen Roberts, they're never gonna find her ...
[she pulls out a folder and hands it to Gale]
BIANCA: Rina Reynolds, they will.
JENNIFER: Rina Reynolds ... stage name.
BIANCA: You should talk, Judy Jurgenstern.
[Jennifer gets a disgusted look on her face, as Gale laughs]
GALE: [turns over one of the photos in the folder and sees a list of feature films that Reynolds appeared in for Sunrise Studios] What are these movies? "Amazombies"? "Space Psycho"? "Creature from the San Andreas Fault"?
BIANCA: Horror pictures. Back in Milton's heyday.
GALE AND JENNIFER: Back in what?
BIANCA: John Milton, the horror producer. Those were his movies.

---

From earthlink.net:

SCREAM 3

Craven, Wes (Director). Scream 3. United States: Craven-Maddalena Films, (2000).

Starring: Carrie Fisher (Bianca, Archivist); Courteney Cox Arquette (Gale Weathers); Parker Posey (Jennifer Jolie)

This conventional horror slasher offers a brief scene set in a motion picture studio archive when reporter Gale Weathers (Courtney Cox) and Jennifer Jolie (Parker Posey, star of Party Girl) need information about a movie actress from years before. They are startled to find that the archivist, Bianca (Carrie Fisher), is the spitting image of Princess Leia of Star Wars, and no wonder since it's the same actress, but she denies this and states in a bitter voice: " I was up for Princess Leia. I was this close. So, who gets it? The one who sleeps with George Lucas." Bianca is filing her nails when they arrive, and during the conversation she lights up a cigarette. Her red hair is shoulder-length and straight, and her clothing is shiny and theatrical. No eyeglasses. At first Bianca refuses to help, but then the ladies bribe her with a fifty dollar bill and a gold ring worth two grand. She pulls photos for them from a file cabinet and off they go on their quest. There's lots of humor in the scene, a nice break from all the blood and bad music.

Case Study No. 0106: Miss Herrera and Violet Stanhope

AWM - 106 - The Haunting of Riverdale pt.2
7:24
COMMENT, ADD, RATE, AND SUBSCRIBE!!!!
---- DISCLAIMER! ----
Copyright Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use.

Something is haunting Riverdale, and it seems to be related to the public library. After a bit of research, it is discovered that the ghost belongs to the former librarian, who was very devoted during life to the good of the library. It seems that she is still there because she has some unfinished business...and Jughead holds the key that will let her move on.
Tags: AWM 106 The Haunting of Riverdale pt.2 Archie's Weird Mysteries Archie Jughead Veronica Betty Pop Tate monsters ghosts aliens ufo
Added: 2 years ago
From: AWMEPS
Views: 18,828

[inside Riverdale High School, Archie Andrews is walking down the hallway by himself]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [to himself] The deadline for the next column is Friday, and I can't even find an mildly odd mystery, much less a weird one.
[he suddenly notices that the principal is leading Reggie - who suddenly has white hair - down the hallway]
MR. WEATHERBEE: There there, Reggie. You can rest in the nurse's office until your parents come to pick you up.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [running up to them] Mister Weatherbee! What's wrong with Reggie?
MR. WEATHERBEE: Poor Reggie's in a state of shock, Archie. The school nurse says that after a couple of days of rest, Reggie should be back to his normal self.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [grabs Reggie's shoulders] Reggie, it's me, your friend Archie! Speak to me!
REGGIE MANTLE: [in a trance-like state] Shhh. We have to be quiet. All those years we made fun of her behind her back, now she's come back for revenge.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Who?
REGGIE MANTLE: Quiet Violet. She's coming. You'd better watch out ... [hands him a piece of paper] Keep this safe for me.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [reads the paper] Uh, good thinking Reggie. Wouldn't want your overdue library book notice to get in the wrong hands.
MR. WEATHERBEE: He must have experienced some sort of horrendous scare last night. I just found him wandering through the gym.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Weird.
MR. WEATHERBEE: The radio news says there's been eleven other cases like this in Riverdale since last night. A real mystery.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: A really weird mystery! Don't worry Reggie, I'll get to the bottom of this!
[Archie runs off]
MR. WEATHERBEE: What a strange young man.
REGGIE MANTLE: Quiet Violet will get him too, if he doesn't watch out ...

[...]

[Archie and Jughead are walking down the street]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: I'm going to interview those other eleven cases.
JUGHEAD JONES: And what do I do?
ARCHIE ANDREWS: We don't know what is causing this. Go to the library and see if you can dig up anything similar in the Riverdale history archives.
JUGHEAD JONES: [gulps] L-Library? Uh, um ... [he runs off] I just remember, I hafta help my Mom with some chores! Bye, see ya tomorrow!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [yelling after him] But Jughead--
JUGHEAD JONES: Oh, and best of luck on the weird mystery!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [to himself] Thanks a lot! What's with him? Well, I guess the library is my first stop ...
[cut to inside the Riverdale Public Library, as Archie walks up to the female librarian at the front desk]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Hello, Miss Herrera. Is my usual table available?
MISS HERRERA: More weird mystery research, Archie?
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Yup.
[Archie ends up looking through several piles of books, but finds nothing useful]
MISS HERRERA: [as she sees Archie heading for the exit] Did any of those books help?
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Nope, nothing that matches what I'm investigating. Whatever the answer is to this weird mystery, it isn't here at the library.
[behind his back, the books levitate and reshelve themselves]

[...]

[Archie returns to the library, after finding out that the other shock victims were - like Reggie - clutching overdue library notices]
MISS HERRERA: Hello, Archie. What can I do for you?
ARCHIE ANDREWS: This may seem like a strange question ... but has anything out of the ordinary happened here lately?
[she looks around to make sure no one else is listening, then gets up and waves him over to behind the bookstacks]
MISS HEREERA: [grabbing Archie's arm once he comes closer] Not out here where everyone can hear us ...
[they move further into the stacks and start whispering]
MISS HERRERA: I don't want to alarm the library patrons, but I've noticed a lot of unusual occurrences since I took over as head librarian.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Like what?
MISS HERRERA: Sometimes I get the feeling that there's some strange presence behind me, but when I turn around, no one is there.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Hmmm ...
MISS HERRERA: There have also been sudden drops in temperature, and a cold breeze through the library when there isn't an open window! And, and even stranger things ... the books shelve themselves! Patrons will ask for a book, and it will appear on the desk! Even a batch of overdue book notices disappeared yesterday!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: I bet there were twelve of those notices, right?
MISS HERRERA: Yes, there were! How do you know that?
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Something scared Reggie, Pop Tate, and ten other Riverdale citizens into advanced stages of shock last night. The only thing that all twelve victims had in common? They each had overdue library books!
MISS HERRERA: It's almost as if something is trying to help out the library, but doesn't realize how spooky all this seems!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Interesting, this sounds like a classic poltergeist manifestation! Mind if I look around?
MISS HERRERA: If it will help get rid of this problem before it scares people away, you can investigate all you want!

[...]

[Archie is looking through the stacks for the poltergeist, when he comes across the ghost of an elderly woman floating in the air]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: What do I do now?
[when the ghost's back is turned, he slowly approaches it]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [nervously] Uh, excuse me? Pardon me?
[getting no reaction, he raises his voice]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: I said, excuse me?
VIOLET STANHOPE: [angrily] Quiet!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [backs away] I think I just overplayed my hand!
[the ghost chases Archie around the library, but he eventually trips and loses sight of her]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [enters the main reading room and addresses the confused patrons] Uh, did anyone see where that ghost went?
[the ghost appears]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Oops, never mind ...
VIOLET STANHOPE: Quiet! No shouting in the library! I'm not going to warn you again!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Sorry, I didn't realize folks on the other side were so picky about library etiquette ...
[backing away, Archie trips over a chair and falls]
VIOLET STANHOPE: Troublemaker! I warned you!
[the ghost causes a pile of books to float towards Archie and start "biting" him]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Ow! I've heard of throwing the book at someone, but this is going too far!
[the books eventually lift Archie off the ground, then drop him back down to the floor]
VIOLET STANHOPE: I hope you've learned your lesson! Behave yourself in the library!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Yes, ma'am. I make it a policy never to argue with angry ectoplasm ...
VIOLET STANHOPE: Very well! Put these books on the cart when you're through with them!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Huh?
[the ghost disappears into a portrait hanging behind the front desk]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [reading the inscription on the portrait] "In memoriam, Violet Stanhope" ... Of course, the old head librarian! Hmm ...
[he notices that all of the frightened patrons are running out the front door]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: I guess it's too late to keep this from scaring people away from the library ... Wait a minute, Violet Stanhope. Quiet Violet!

[...]

[Archy and Betty are sitting in his garage and looking through books on ghosts]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: There must be something in all these library books on hauntings for getting rid of ghosts ...
BETTY COOPER: I just can't believe that Miss Stanhope's ghost really means to scare all these people.
JUGHEAD JONES: [walks into the garage] What's up?
BETTY COOPER: Archie traced all those mysterious incidents back to the library.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: The old head librarian's ghost is haunting Riverdale, so we're trying to find a way to stop her before she scares anyone else.
JUGHEAD JONES: [grabs the book out of his hands] Leave this one alone, Archie! Don't go up against Quiet Violet!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Calm down, Jughead! What's gotten into you?
JUGHEAD JONES: [shaking] Just promise me you won't go back to that ... that library!
BETTY COOPER: What do you have against the library, Jughead?
JUGHEAD JONES: I never told anyone this story before. I was only six years old ...
[Jughead has a flashback to when he was a young boy at the library]
JUGHEAD JONES: [in voice-over] It was my first and last visit to the library. It was fun at first. There were so many exciting things to see. Then she came by, and started to ruin it!
[young Jughead is spinning a globe, when a still-living Miss Stanhope comes towards him with an angry look on her face]
VIOLET STANHOPE: [evil laugh] That's not a toy, little boy!
JUGHEAD JONES: [in voice-over] There was this really interesting book, but Quiet Violet wouldn't let me enjoy it!
[Miss Stanhope grabs the book out of little Jughead's hands]
VIOLET STANHOPE: [angrily] That book isn't for little boys! Go to the childrens' section where you belong!
JUGHEAD JONES: [in voice-over] Even that couldn't spoil it for me ... Later, there was an even better book in the childrens' section. This book was so funny, I couldn't stop myself from laughing. But Quiet Violet couldn't let me enjoy the book!
[young Jughead is reading and laughing loudly, but Miss Stanhope grabs him]
VIOLET STANHOPE: Quiet! No laughing in the library!
JUGHEAD JONES: [in voice-over] I felt about as low as a little boy could. I decided to leave the library before I started crying. But she wasn't done with me yet!
[holding back tears, young Jughead runs towards the exit, still holding the book]
VIOLET STANHOPE: [yelling after him] Wait! Come back here, little boy! Stop!
[the flashback ends]
JUGHEAD JONES: Ugh, and I never went back to the library after that!
BETTY COOPER: Violet Stanhope wasn't a bit like that, Jughead! She may have looked a little frightening, but she cared about children. She helped me get my first library card.
JUGHEAD JONES: All I know is that if she was that frightening in life, she must be twice as horrible as a ghost!
BETTY COOPER: I can't even understand why she would haunt the library in the first place.
JUGHEAD JONES: Here's something. It says here that many ghosts haunt a place because they have unfinished business left over from their lives.
BETTY COOPER: So, if we figure out what Miss Stanhope's unfinished business is, we can help her finish it and she'll stop haunting the library!

[...]

[Archie and Betty enter the library, which is empty except for Miss Herrera]
MISS HERRERA: [sadly] Hello, Archie. Hello, Betty.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Where is everyone?
BETTY COOPER: I've never seen the library so empty!
MISS HERRERA: Haven't you heard? The library is haunted!
BETTY COOPER: People aren't coming to the library because they're frightened?
MISS HERRERA: A library without people reading is like ... like, well, like a bookshelf without books. I can't believe that Violet means to scare people away, this library was her life!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: We think we might have a chance of ending this haunting, but we need to find out more about Miss Stanhope.
BETTY COOPER: Is there anyone still around who knew her well?
MISS HERRERA: [she gets up and retrieves a book from the stacks] Violet did write and self-publish this memoir of her years as a librarian here. Will that help?
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [takes the book] This might just be what we need!
[cut to Archie and Betty after they've read the book]
BETTY COOPER: Amazing! Who knew?
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Incredible! This has to be Quiet Violet's unfinished business ...
BETTY AND ARCHIE: But how are we going to get Jughead back into the library?

[...]

[Betty and Archie return to the library at night, convincing Jughead to join them by promising him free lunches at Pop Tate's for a month]
MISS HERRERA: [unlocks the front door] Are you sure this is going to work?
ARCHIE ANDREWS: It's the best chance we have of de-haunting the library.
JUGHEAD JONES: Why don't we just brick up the library, and never go inside again?
BETTY COOPER: Not an option, Jughead!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Let's go in ...
[they enter, but Jughead tries to sneak away before the others grab him from behind]
JUGHEAD JONES: But I forgot to pay the meter!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [drags him back inside] You don't own a car, Jughead!
BETTY COOPER: So what do we do now?
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Wait ... if I have this figured out right, it shouldn't be long.
JUGHEAD JONES: And if you don't have this figured out right?
ARCHIE ANDREWS: We're ghost toast ...
[the portrait of Miss Stanhope starts glowing]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Look!
[her ghost suddenly appears]
VIOLET STANHOPE: Library hours are over! Go home, trespassers! Vandals! Go home!
ARCHIE ANDREWS: Miss Stanhope, we're not trespassers or vandals! We've come to help you!
[he points at Jughead]
ARCHIE ANDREWS: This is the little boy you've been wanting to see for so long!
VIOLET STANHOPE: The little boy?
JUGHEAD JONES: Archie, you finked me out to a ghost!
BETTY COOPER: It's not what you think!
[the ghost stops glowing, and appears as she did when she was alive]
VIOLET STANHOPE: My, look at him, all grown up!
JUGHEAD JONES: Huh? [hides behind Betty]
BETTY COOPER: That's open to debate ...
JUGHEAD JONES: It's a trick! She's just acting nice, so that she can get a chance to grab me!
VIOLET STANHOPE: You poor dear, I don't know why you found me so frightening.
JUGHEAD JONES: Well, you were mean! You wouldn't let me play with the globe!
VIOLET STANHOPE: I wasn't being mean ...
[the scene flashes back to young Jughead playing with the globe]
VIOLET STANHOPE: [in voice-over] The globe almost fell over on you, I was only warning you to be careful.
[Miss Stanhope comes over and steadies the globe before it falls over on top of Jughead]
JUGHEAD JONES: [in voice-over] Well, what about that book you snatched from me?
VIOLET STANHOPE: That book was waiting to be repaired, all the pages were coming loose. That's why I took it from you and gave you that other book from the childrens' section.
[Miss Stanhope takes the book from young Jughead and leads him by the hand to the childrens' section]
JUGHEAD JONES: [in voice-over] You gave me that book? I don't remember that.
VIOLET STANHOPE: [in voice-over] Well, you seemed awfully scared of me. Maybe you blocked it out.
JUGHEAD JONES: [in voice-over] But you did make me stop laughing, that was really mean!
VIOLET STANHOPE: [in voice-over] Do you remember how loud you were? You were making quite a ruckus ...
[young Jughead is laughing loudly and banging his fist on the table, as other patrons start angrily looking in his direction]
VIOLET STANHOPE: [in voice-over] A little happy noise in the library is okay, but you were really laughing up a storm there! And there were people in the library who were studying, and needed quiet.
JUGHEAD JONES: [in voice-over] I guess you're right about that.
[Miss Stanhope politely motions for young Jughead to keep quiet, but he still winds up on the verge of tears]
VIOLET STANHOPE: [in voice-over] But I should've realized how intimidated you were. I felt horrible when I saw that look on your face.
[young Jughead runs out of the library, still holding the book]
JUGHEAD JONES: [in voice-over] Well, I still don't understand why you chased me when I left the library. That was scary!
VIOLET STANHOPE: [in voice-over] You were leaving with that library book.
[the flashback ends]
VIOLET STANHOPE: I needed to give you a library card so you could check it out. But you were out the door too fast ... I never stopped waiting for your next visit to the library. I wanted so much to show you how enjoyable our library was, but you never came back.
JUGHEAD JONES: I thought you wanted to get me. I guess I was wrong about you. But you looked so mean!
VIOLET STANHOPE: People, like books, should never be judged by their covers. I never meant to frighten anyone.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: But you have been frightening people. You really scared those people when you tried to give them their overdue notices. And now no one comes to the library anymore, because it's haunted.
VIOLET STANHOPE: That's terrible! I was only trying to help, I didn't realize that I was scaring people.
BETTY COOPER: Time to leave the library and move on, Miss Stanhope. Miss Herrera will take care of the library for you now.
VIOLET STANHOPE: You're right, of course. I leave under one condition. That this young man promises to finally get his library card and visit the library often.
JUGHEAD JONES: I promise!
VIOLET STANHOPE: Goodbye, then ... [she turns to leave] What's your name, young man?
JUGHEAD JONES: Jughead. Jughead Jones.
VIOLET STANHOPE: Enjoy reading these books, Jughead Jones.
[she walks out the door and disappears]
JUGHEAD JONES: [wipes away a tear] Is it possible to miss someone you never got a chance to know?
BETTY COOPER: [hands him Miss Stanhope's book] You can know her from her book.
ARCHIE ANDREWS: [in voice-over] So everything is as it should be. The ghost of Violet Stanhope no longer haunts the library, but her good influence on Riverdale will never go away. And Jughead has rediscovered the library after years of avoiding it. Cookbooks, adventure stories, local history. He's reading all types of books. But his personal favorite is a book by a librarian named Violet Stanhope. It's pretty good, you oughta check it out the next time you visit the library, in a little town called Riverdale.

---

From imdb.com:

Archie's Weird Mysteries: The Haunting of Riverdale (Season 1, Episode 6)

Synopsis: Riverdale citizens are scared into a state of shock, being found clutching overdue library book notices. Archie discovers that the horrifying ghost of the old head librarian haunts the Riverdale library, continuing to perform her library duties from beyond the grave. High on her list is Jughead, who has a book that's been overdue for more than 10 years! Will he pay the ultimate fine for his tardiness?

Case Study No. 0105: Mercy MacGregor

The Tale of the Quiet Librarian - 1/3
9:55
Are You Afraid of the Dark?, season 4, episode 43. Part 1 of 3.
Tags: are you afraid of the dark tale quiet librarian
Added: 3 years ago
From: ClassicSlime
Views: 27,457

[members of the Midnight Society are gathering around the campfire for the night's story, while Frank has Tucker in a headlock]
FRANK: Had enough, big guy?
TUCKER: Oh, this is real fair! You're only 200 pounds heavier than me!
KIKI: Shhh!
FRANK: I'm not hurting him!
KIKI: I know, just ... shhh.
BETTY ANN: What're you doing?
KIKI: I want everyone to be real quiet.
TUCKER: Uh, hello?
KIKI: Everyone settle, and just listen.
SAM: What're we listening to?
KIKI: Silence. Total silence.
GARY: That's impossible. Absolute silence doesn't exist.
SAM: Yeah, there's always something making noise.
KIKI: Exactly. So when grown-ups say they want it quiet, there's no way ... 'cause there's no such thing.
TUCKER: I'll remember that.
KIKI: But what if there could be total silence? What if you could stop every sound? Every buzz? Every breath?
GARY: You couldn't. Where there's life, there's sound.
KIKI: Say that another way. You take away sound, and you take away ... life! Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this story "The Tale Of The Quiet Librarian."
[the story begins, as a female librarian is leading a class of students through the public library]
MRS. HURLEY: Come along, children. That's it, don't lag behind there, children. Come along, children. Pay attention, and we're off to the childrens' library, where I hope you'll spend many hours.
[one young boy falls behind the group while bouncing a rubber ball]
MRS. HURLEY: [barely audible as the group is moving farther away] Here are some of our librarians, going all the way back to 1837 ...
[the ball gets away from him and rolls down a flight of stairs, winding up near an old door hidden behind some boxes of books, with an eerie purple glow emanating from the other side]
BOY: [reaches over to grab the ball, but instead knocks it underneath the door and into the unseen room] Rats ... [he reads the sign on the door] "Quiet Reading Room."
[the door suddenly opens by itself, and the boy opens his mouth to scream but no sound comes out]

[...]

[a young girl and her little sister are in the downstairs section of the library by themselves]
NATALIE'S SISTER: [reciting the alphabet and then wanders off]
NATALIE: Don't go too far ...
[she begins looking through a book, when the door to the Quiet Reading Room opens up behind her, so she screams and drops the book but again no sound is made]
NATALIE'S SISTER: [she wanders back into the scene] Natalie? Natalie, where are you?
[she sees the book on the floor and runs off in fright]

[...]

[Jace and Laurie, two young students who have been assigned to work together on a project, are sitting in the library]
JACE: [is obviously bored, so pulls out an electronic sound maker and starts pushing the buttons]
LAURIE: Shh! We need these books from downstairs ... [hands him her notebook] If it's not too much trouble. I know how busy you are.
JACE: I'm just trying to get you to lighten up.
LAURIE: Don't bother. Get the books.
JACE: Why don't you get 'em?
LAURIE: Because I'm already doing all the work.
JACE: 'Cause you won't let me do anything.
LAURIE: Because, maybe, I don't wanna flunk!
JACE: Let's flip for it. Heads I go, tails you go.
LAURIE: [shakes her head]
JACE: Aw, come on, live dangerously, alright?
[he flips the coin]
JACE: Uh, two outta three?
LAURIE: Goodbye.
JACE: [as he's leaving] Chilly. Very chilly.
[cut to Jace in the basement level, where - once he makes sure no one is looking - he puts on a pair of glasses and starts looking for the books]
JACE: [after that same rubber ball suddenly bounces near his feet] Hello? Hello?
[right before he gets near the door, the female librarian suddenly bumps into him]
MRS. HURLEY: Oh! Goodness, you frightened me! May I help you look for something?
JACE: Uh, no thanks ... [he runs off, leaving Laurie's notebook on the shelf]
[cut to Jace meeting Laurie at the copy machine with the books she asked for]
LAURIE: It's about time. Did you find ... I didn't know you wore glasses!
JACE: [suddenly notices he's still wearing the glasses and quickly takes them off] Uh, I don't ... usually.
[Laurie gives him a look and takes the books back to their table, where Jace sits down and starts nervously fidgeting]
LAURIE: Why are you so jumpy?
JACE: I'm not jumpy ... Wadda we do now?
LAURIE: I do research. You sit there, and don't bother me.
JACE: [insulted, he takes out the noise maker and starts pushing buttons again]
LAURIE: [embarrassed that all the other patrons are staring, she grabs the noise maker out of his hands] Do you mind?
JACE: Why are you treating me like a kid?
LAURIE: Because you're acting like one!
JACE: That's it ... I'm outta here! [he gets up and leaves]
LAURIE: Hey!

[...]

[realizing that he left Laurie's notebook in the basement, the two head back to the library after hours]
LAURIE: [tries the door and finds it locked] Why didn't you check the closing time?
JACE: Hey, you said seven o'clock, not me!
LAURIE: I'm gonna flunk! I've never flunked anything in my life!
JACE: No? You didn't do too hot in the teamwork department, remember?
LAURIE: [frustrated, she tries banging on the door]
JACE: [pulls her away from the door] There's nothing else we can do, except ... [he looks around to see if anyone else is around] Maybe I can open one of those windows.
LAURIE: You-you can't be serious, that's like, illegal.
JACE: You got a better idea?
LAURIE: Jace, don't!
JACE: It's okay. I forgot the notebook, I'll get it.
LAURIE: You don't have to.
JACE: Sure I do. I don't wanna be responsible for the one and only time you ever flunked.

[...]

[one of the windows ends up opening by itself, so the two make their way into the library and down to the basement level]
JACE: Man, it's weird in here at night!
LAURIE: [drops her bookpack on the floor]
JACE: Why'd you do that?
LAURIE: [confused] What happened to the copy machine? It used to be right there.
JACE: Yeah ...
LAURIE: Where'd all the computers go? And the VCR?
JACE: Yeah.
[they hear the sound of a doorknob turning]
LAURIE: What was that?
JACE: The-the radiator, I think. Let's bolt ... [turns to leave]
LAURIE: We have to get my notebook!
JACE: Right. That's, um, in the basement.
[cut to Jace and Laurie walking down the stairs into the basement]
LAURIE: [notices that there are now kerosene lamps instead of light switches] Where'd you leave it?
JACE: Over there, I think ... but everything's different.
LAURIE: What do you mean?
JACE: It wasn't like this yesterday. There were a lot more books, and that room wasn't there.
[he points to the door marked "Quiet Reading Room", which is no longer hidden behind boxes]
LAURIE: Look at this ... [points to a calendar hanging on the wall] 1910.
JACE: It's gotta be some phony antique.
LAURIE: [she takes a key hanging on the wall and goes to open the door]
JACE: Hey, maybe we shouldn't mess with--
LAURIE: Come on ... live dangerously?
[they open the door and find a group of children covered in cobwebs and reading books; two of them are Natalie and the little boy, who open their mouths to scream but no sound comes out]
LAURIE: [screams]
[the two run out of the room]
LAURIE: What're we gonna do?
JACE: Let's get outta here!
[an elderly female librarian wearing turn-of-century clothes and carrying a glowing box appears at the end of the hall]
LAURIE: It's Mrs. Hurley ... [yelling towards the figure] Mrs. Hurley! It's me, Laurie Napier!
JACE: [grabs her]
MERCY MACGREGOR: No talking in the library ...
JACE: That's not Mrs. Hurley!
MERCY MACGREGOR: There's room for two more ...
[Laurie and Jace both scream and run away]
JACE: [turns and yells at the librarian] Who are you?
MERCY MACGREGOR: [opens the glowing box and points it at him]
JACE: Get away from me!
MERCY MACGREGOR: [laughing]
JACE: Laur-- [he suddenly can't speak]
LAURIE: Jace! [grabs him and pulls a book cart in front of them, knocking the books off to block the librarian's path]
[they run up the stairs and barricade the door down to the basement]
LAURIE: Who was that? What happened to your voice?
JACE: [gestures wildly]
LAURIE: Come on! [tries to open a window but it won't budge] Try the others!
JACE: [runs to the front desk]
LAURIE: What're you looking for?
JACE: [mimicks picking up a phone receiver]
LAURIE: The phone ... They're gone! The fire alarm, it's gone too! Everything modern is gone! Jace, what is going on?
MERCY MACGREGOR: [from behind the door] Silence is golden ...
[the door suddenly opens, and the two get on the ground and try crawling out of sight]
MERCY MACGREGOR: Heh heh heh ...
[while crawling away, Jace knocks down an old milk jug, so the librarian - with an annoyed look on her face - opens the box to "suck up" the sound of it falling]

[...]

[Laurie tries to hide in the stacks on the upper level, but the librarian can hear her heartbeat and is following her]
JACE: [one the lower level, he starts up an old hand-crank record player to draw the librarian's attention]
MERCY MACGREGOR: [suddenly appearing behind him] I'm going to teach you a lesson, just like I do to all loud children! My reading room is so peaceful and quiet ... You're going to like it, just like all the others.
[grabbing some records, Jace runs off and starts smashing them on the ground to make noise]
JACE: Heh heh heh ... [uses the box to suck up the noise]
LAURIE: [runs up behind them] No, don't! Leave him--
MERCY MACGREGOR: [turns around and sucks up her voice] Ha ha ha!
[Laurie runs off]
MERCY MACGREGOR: I think it's time you joined me downstairs, dear ...
LAURIE: [find her backpack and pulls out Jace's electronic noise maker]
MERCY MACGREGOR: [disturbed by the noise] No, stop it! Stop it! No ...
LAURIE: [she throws it to Jace, who continues making noise]
MERCY MACGREGOR: Stop that! Stop it, no! Children who make noise in the library must be punished!
[while the librarian is distracted with Jace, Laurie pushes a marble bust into her, causing her to drop her box]
MERCY MACGREGOR: [picks up the box, but suddenly she loses control of it, and all of the "noises" start shooting out of it]
[cut to a library security guard, who finds Laurie and Jace]
SECURITY GUARD: What're you kids doing in here?
[he turns on the light, as Laurie and Jace find that the library is back in "modern" times]
SECURITY GUARD: How'd you get in?
[he finds a burning pile of ash and a pair of glasses lying on the floor]
SECURITY GUARD: What the?
JACE: Uh, there was a... My voice is back!
LAURIE: Uh, mine too!
JACE: ... The reading room!
LAURIE: [to the security guard] We found the missing kids!
[they head down to the basement]
JACE: There's a door behind there!
LAURIE: Hurry!
SECURITY GUARD: This door hasn't been opened in years!
[he forces the door open, and Natalie and the little boy come out]
LAURIE: Are you guys okay?
NATALIE: Yeah, I think.
JACE: Look in here.
[they go inside, where they find the table and piles of books covered in cobwebs]
SECURITY GUARD: Oh my ... It's like a tomb in here. I gotta call this in, you kids stay put. [he leaves]
[Jace and Natalie start to leave, when they hear the sound of laughing children]
JACE: Whoever they were, I think they're free now.
[cut to Jace and Laurie in the main reading room]
LAURIE: They're never gonna believe us, are they?
JACE: I'm not sure I believe us!
LAURIE: Y'know, maybe we're not such a bad team after all ...
FEMALE POLICE OFFICER: [holds up Laurie's notebook] Is this anybody's?
LAURIE: My notebook!
FEMALE POLICE OFFICER: You kids can go now. If we need you, we'll call.
[they go to leave]
LAURIE: We still have to write that paper.
JACE: We?
LAURIE: Come on, let's live dangerously!
[as they exit the library, the camera focuses on a large portrait hanging on the wall, which reads "Mercy MacGregor (Head Librarian, 1885-1910)"]

[...]

[cut back to the members of the Midnight Society]
FRANK: Cool story!
SAM: Yeah, I never knew silence could be so creepy!
GARY: I declare this meeting of the Midnight Society closed.
KIKI: Speaking of libraries, I have some books I have to return. Does anyone wanna keep me company?
BETTY ANN: But it's way past closing.
KIKI: I was gonna drop 'em in the night slot. Who's with me?
GARY: Uh, I gotta go.
SAM: Yeah ... Oh, and look at the time!
[everybody starts running off]
BETTY ANN: Gotta roll! Uh, see you guys next time!
FRANK: Hasta la vista!
KIKI: Tucker!
TUCKER: Uh, bye!
KIKI: Come on, just leave me at the corner! You don't have to go near the building! Guys ... guys? [proud of herself that she made everyone so frightened of going to the library]

---

From tv.com:

"Are You Afraid of the Dark?" (Season 4, Episode 6) - The Tale of the Quiet Librarian

A forgotten book forces two bitter rivals to work together to avoid the clutches of a ghostly librarian who insists that "Silence is golden".

Guest Cast:
Anna MacCormack ... Quiet Librarian
Aaron A. McConnaughey ... Jace Ellman
Evan Evans ... Library Security Guard
Shannon Duff ... Laurie Napier

---

From sydlexia.com:

Jace is a cocky football-playing douchebag with shit for brains. Laurie is a quiet girl who enjoys school, but she's also rather condescending. When the two of them get paired up together on a history project, things don't go so well. While they're working on their project at the library, Laurie refuses to let Jace help because she's a bitch and she thinks he'll fuck up the paper because he's not as smart as her. Jace responds by being an asshole and playing with a loud electronic toy. Then Laurie yells at him, so he grabs some of the books for their project and leaves. Laurie chases him and gets him to agree to give her the books and do the project by herself. Later on, she realizes that Jace left some important notes she gave him at the library and asks for his help in finding them. After she begs, he reluctantly agrees to help her look for them after football practice. When they get to the library, it's closed, so Jace breaks in. Inside the library, the children are chased by the Quiet Librarian, an evil ghost who steals children's voices and traps them in her reading room. She manages to steal both Jace and Laurie's voices with her glowy purple box, but is unable to catch the children. Then they figure out her weakness is noise, so Jace takes out his stupid toy from before and keeps pressing buttons on it until the evil librarian ghost and the glowy purple box explode. Shortly thereafter, a police officer discovers the children in the library and asks them what the fuck they're doing there. They take him to the librarian's hidden reading room, where they discover some children who recently went missing. After the officer leaves with the missing children, Jace and Laurie hear the ghostly laughter of the other children they freed, the ones who were trapped in the room until they died. United by their horrible experience, Jace and Laurie become friends and work on their stupid project together.

Case Study No. 0104: Ms. Underdorf

Mudshark by Gary Paulsen
1:35
Mudshark goes head to head with the Librarian's pet parrot to solve the mystery of the school's missing erasers.
Tags: Middle school reading books for kids great books Gary Paulsen Library Librarian
Added: 9 months ago
From: TheWMSLibrarian
Views: 513

[Mrs. Gaither the WMS Librarian speaks directly to the camera]
GAITHER: The story is about a mystery that's going on at school. The main character is Mudshark, he's just a regular kid, but he's gotten this cool nickname and you have to read the story to find out how he gets the nickname. But he is known for paying attention to detail, and having a great memory, and so what happens in his school is if someone loses something or they misplace something, they go and they ask Mudshark, "Hey, have you seen this, or do you know where it is?" And almost all the time, he knows exactly where that person needs to go to find that lost item. Well, what's really interesting in this particular book, is he gets some competition by this crazy parrot that the librarian has made a pet of in the library, and this parrot starts answering the questions, and so the kids start saying, "Hey, that parrot is just as smart - or smarter - than Mudshark!" And then these mysterious things start happening around the school, and the principal calls Mudshark in to help solve the mystery!

---

From barnesandnoble.com:

"Mudshark" by Gary Paulsen

Mudshark is the go-to guy for any mysteries that need solving. Lost your shoe? Can't find your homework? Ask Mudshark. That is, until the Psychic Parrot takes up residence in the school library and threatens to overturn Mudshark's position as the guy who knows all the answers. The word in school is that the parrot can out-think Mudshark. And right now, the school needs someone who's good at solving problems. There's an escaped gerbil running rampant, an emergency in the faculty restroom, and all the erasers are disappearing from the classrooms.

When Mudshark solves the mystery of who's stealing the erasers, he discovers the culprit has the best of intentions. Now he has to think of a way to prevent the Psychic Parrot from revealing the eraser-thief's identity. With a bit of misdirection and a lot of quick thinking, Mudshark restores order to the chaos . . . just for the moment.

---

From thrivingfamily.com:

Twelve-year-old Lyle Williams plays Death Ball — a combination of soccer, football, wrestling, rugby and mud fighting. When he trips and lands flat on his back, a member of the opposing team runs by him with the ball. Lyle stretches out his arm, grabs the player and prevents him from scoring. Later, Billy Crisper, an avid viewer of the animal channel, says that Lyle moved as fast as a mud shark. From that point forward, Lyle Williams is called by the nickname Mudshark.

Mudshark is such a keen observer that kids who have lost something come to him for help. When Kyle Robertson magically makes his father's car disappear, Mudshark finds it. When Willamena Carson loses the plastic brain that fits inside her model skull, Mudshark uncovers it. When Ms. Underdorf, the school librarian, buys an armadillo that never eats or moves, Mudshark realizes that it is actually a purse. Ms. Underdorf then buys a new pet — a squawky bird that has an uncanny ability to retrieve lost items, much like Mudshark.

When the principal asks for Mudshark's help in recovering all of the school's missing erasers, Mudshark recruits his friends, the librarian and the custodian to help him dupe the chatty bird, find the erasers and protect the culprit's identity.

Authority roles
Nearly every chapter opens with an announcement from the school principal regarding three things: the hazardous smell coming from the faculty restroom, the increasing amount of missing erasers and a lost gerbil. The principal also feels it is his responsibility to get out of the way of teachers so they can teach. The narrator comments that the school secretary actually runs the school. Ms. Underdorf is happy that more kids are populating the library, even though they are only there to ask the parrot questions because they think it's psychic.

---

From google.com:

One of the more interesting and long-lasting side effects of the crayfish experiment was that the librarian, Ms. Underdorf, decided to turn her library into a small, personal zoo.

There are many ways to describe Ms. Underdorf.

She was brilliant and joyous and she believed - probably correctly - that libraries contain the answers to all things, to everything, and that if you can't find the information you seek in the library, then such information probably does not exist in this or any parallel universe now or ever to be known.

She was thoughtful and kind and she always believed the best of everybody. She was, above all else, a master librarian and knew where to find any book on any subject in the shortest possible time.

And she was wonderfully unhinged. So when the School Administration Science Experiment Directive came down about crayfish, she embraced it with an enthusiasm any educational administrator would have found rewarding.

If a couple of crayfish were good, she thought, looking around at all the empty space in her library that suddenly seemed to cry out for cages and aquariums and terrariums, then other examples of more exotic living creatures would be better.

And so the Amazing Armadillo.

Case Study No. 0103: Patrick Sweeney

Working at a library is like the Matrix
1:55
I always feel like working at a library is just like the Matrix because everything we need to do our job is right here for us at our fingertips. Anything we want to learn from languages to marketing to budgeting is available to us at all times on our shelves. So it always surprises me when I see that libraries are not at the forefront of technology, innovation, and design. I think its time that we, as librarians, take the responsibility to take the time to learn everything we need to do our jobs better. After all, how can we expect our patrons to learn when we don't do it ourselves. So this is my challenge to all librarians - find out what you need to learn to do your job better, then learn it.

Of course, I might be totally wrong here. If I am, take the time to comment, criticize, and don't forget to subscribe, and let me know how you feel. Thanks Team.

Patrick Sweeney
www.pcsweeney.com

PLUGGING IN
Twitter @psweeney
myspace /pcsweeney
youtube /pcsweeneydotcom
Tags: Libraries Librarian library innovation
Added: 2 years ago
From: pcsweeneydotcom
Views: 591

[scene opens with Patrick speaking directly to the camera]
PATRICK: Alright team, we're gonna talk about why working in a library is just like The Matrix. I am a nerd, and I am a fan of The Matrix. So, you know how in The Matrix when Neo is trying to rescue Morpheus, and they're on top of the building and Trinity needs to learn how to fly the helicopter? And they just download it real fast into her brain? Well, that's how I feel working in a library. We are surrounded by all the information we could possibly need to do any aspect of our job. If you need to write a report for the library board, or an article for the newspaper ...
[he holds up a copy of "The Work of Writing"]
PATRICK: If you need some music for your childrens' program ...
[he holds up a copy of "The Acoustic Guitar Method"]
PATRICK: Let's say you work in an area where 90 percent of the population speaks Spanish ...
[he holds up a copy of "Dimelo Tu!"]
PATRICK: Or let's just say you get some asinine idea to make a video blog for libraries ...
[he holds up a copy of "Videoblogging For Dummies"]
PATRICK: But what I'm saying is that everything that we need to do our jobs is right there in the library. From creating library websites, to budgeting, to marketing strategic plans, it's all there. So it always surprises me when libraries don't have the best of everything. Now, when I talk to other librarians about this, I always get the same argument - "Why should I learn it? They're not gonna pay me extra to learn it!" Y'know what? You're probably right. They're not gonna pay you to learn this stuff. But wouldn't it be nice to go to the next job interview and, when they ask you what you can bring to the table, you say "Oh well, website design. I speak Spanish. I can write a marketing plan. I can write a strategic plan. I'm fantastic at budgeting." And if you think that people working for some of the most innovative companies in the world aren't going home and studying up on how they can do a better job, then you're fooling yourself, because they absolutely are! So all I'm saying is that it's time that we as librarians take the time out of our busy days to read a book and become the absolute best at everything we do ... And of course, if you have a good argument as to why we shouldn't be at the forefront of technology, please feel free to email me, comment, but don't forget to subscribe. Thanks team!

---

From wordpress.com:

I always feel like working at a library is just like the Matrix because everything we need to do our job is right here for us at our fingertips. Anything we want to learn from languages to marketing to budgeting is available to us at all times on our shelves. So it always surprises me when I see that libraries are not at the forefront of technology, innovation, and design. I think its time that we, as librarians, take the responsibility to take the time to learn everything we need to do our jobs better. After all, how can we expect our patrons to learn when we don't do it ourselves. So this is my challenge to all librarians – find out what you need to learn to do your job better, then learn it.

Of course, I might be totally wrong here. If I am, take the time to comment, criticize, and don't forget to subscribe, and let me know how you feel. Thanks Team.

And as always, if you have a couple bucks laying around…. Why not donate it to the Coastal Education Project and give the gift of education to coastal communities around the world. www.coastal education project.org

*About Patrick Sweeney*
I am currently the Branch Manager of the East Palo Alto Library in California. This position is allowing me to develop what I have learned from my previous positions in libraries and apply them in a new community, library, and library system. I serve on the organization's emerging technologies committee and am responsible for aspects of the systemwide DVD collection development.

Previously, I worked as a library coordinator (branch manager) of a 40,000 square foot joint use facility in Lincoln California. This library serves a population of approximately 36,000 people, has a budget of 1.2 million dollars, and a team of 11 professional and paraprofessional employees. At LPL I created the Volunteer Program that boasted over 250 volunteers and I created the library's website and managed its online profile.

While in the MLIS program at San Jose State I held the position of Co-Chair and Web-Coordinator for American Library Association (Student Chapter) where our organization won an Associated Students Award for our online outreach program efforts through Youtube and other social networking sites. I have continued this involvement in the professional organization through involvement in ALA Emerging Leaders, a position in the ALA Ethics Committee, and various continuing education opportunities.

Beyond librarianship I have held many positions in organizations that enhance and broaden my skill sets. I was an elementary school librarian in Santa Cruz California where I worked with a diverse and largely Spanish speaking community. As a researcher/writer in Kowloon Tong, Hong Kong I had the opportunity to work in a diverse and challenging environment. As a Martial Arts instructor I was able to help people work as a team to achieve many of their personal goals. And finally, as a manager of Abercrombie and Fitch I was able to gain experience managing people in a fast paced and changing environment.

*About my YouTube videos*
So here is a vlog by a librarian and for librarians. I created this for a couple of reasons;

1) I want to improve my public speaking skills and the great thing about vlogs is that the community will tear apart any idiosyncrasies that I may have in presenting.

2) I hate writing blogs. Theyre long and boring and so much is lost in not communicating non-verbally.

3) Text is dead as a medium on the Internet anyway. Just look at everything you can learn without ever reading an article, blog, or anything really.

4) It looks like there are only a handful of librarian vlogs. Although, now that I think about it... There might be a good reason.

5) I wanted to improve my web skills, video editing skills, and skills at maintaining an online profile.

6) I have all kinds of stuff to say.

Case Study No. 0102: Susan Eckman

Restoration Of 'Star Spangled Banner' Uncovers Horrifying New Verses
2:38
no description available
Tags: Restoration Of 'Star Spangled Banner' Uncovers Horrifying New Verses
Added: 1 year ago
From: moonlasor
Views: 273

[scene opens with the camera focused on Tracy and Jim sitting in-studio]
TRACY: Later on in the hour, we're gonna show you how to spice up the kitchen by imagining hidden dangers. But first, we've got a special Fourth of July treat for you!
JIM: Oh, yes we do. Y'know, the original copy of the Star Spangled Banner goes on display this week at the National Archives.
[various still photos of the "Lost Verses: Francis Scott Key's Complete National Anthem" exhibition are shown, courtesy of the National Archives and Records Administration]
JIM: Restoration of the original manuscript has revealed there are actually multiple new verses that have not been seen or heard in over 150 years!
TRACY: That's right, and joining us now is the director of the exhibit, Susan Eckman.
[camera pans over to show a middle-aged female archivist wearing glasses, as the onscreen graphic reads "History Now! Newly Discovered Verses of Star Spangled Banner Now on Display"]
TRACY: Hi, Susan!
SUSAN: Hi.
JIM: Good morning. Now Susan, most of us of course know that the Star Spangled Banner was written by Francis Scott Key during a battle in the War of 1812.
TRACY: That's how we got "rockets red glare" ...
JIM: Yup.
[onscreen graphic reads "Susan Eckman, Chief of Exhibits, National Archives"]
SUSAN: Right, and the recently discovered verses go into a lot more description of that battle.
JIM: Mm-hmm.
SUSAN: For instance, here's a clip from the sixth verse, recorded especially for our exhibit.
JIM: Oh, that's great! Well, let's take a listen.
TRACY: Yeah!
[they watch the television monitor, which shows a woman in a recording studio]
WOMAN: [singing to the tune of the "Star Spangled Banner"] Tear the heads from our foes, let their hot blood gush forth. Chop their limbs from their trunks, drag their bodies from horses.
TRACY: Oh, very patriotic!
JIM: Wow, that's wonderful!
SUSAN: Yes, Key was clearly very affected by what he saw during that battle.
JIM: Really?
[onscreen graphic reads "Verses Showcase Key's Love of America, Dead Englishmen"]
SUSAN: For instance, the entire tenth verse is basically just a very detailed description of a bayonet wound.
[onscreen graphic reads "No such death will he find as my bayonet slices deep / The fools eyes bulged and rolled as I pierced his cold heart / The sound of flesh flayed and torn ... -- Tenth Verse"
JIM: Oh, very intense.
SUSAN: Yes, by that point, he'd been listening to the screams and cries of his dying friends for well over twelve hours.
JIM: Wow, now that's very neat! Let's listen to a little bit more.
TRACY: Yeah!
[they watch more footage of the singer]
WOMAN: [singing to the tune of the "Star Spangled Banner"] So we beat them with chains, burned their eyes out with flames, and we laughed as they screamed, while we raped who remained.
JIM: Beautiful!
TRACY: I like it! And how many new verses are there?
[onscreen graphic reads "Many Verses Written in Blood of Child Key Believed was King James III"]
SUSAN: Well, there are eighteen true verses. After that, something seems to have snapped in Key's mind, and it just turns into a series of drawings.
[various still photos are show of the original sheet music covered in barely legible drawings of dead bodies]
JIM: So, an artist as well as a patriot!
SUSAN: Yes, here he seems to be representing himself as the king of a family of rats that are spreading bubonic plague across England.
JIM: Oh, look at those!
TRACY: Ooh, very detailed!
SUSAN: Yes.
JIM: Now, the original song's not the only thing that's on display in this new exhibit, is that right?
TRACY: Yes!
[onscreen graphic reads "Key's Kitchen Table Fashioned Entirely From British Spines and Ribcages Also On Display"]
SUSAN: Yes, that's right. We're also showing a very rare painting depicting Key meeting with John Adams.
[a still of the painting is shown, which depicts Key as a crippled madman]
JIM: Ooh, wow!
TRACY: Well, the display is on until the end of the month at the National Archives. Catch it while you can!
JIM: Right.
TRACY: Susan Eckman, thank you!
JIM: Right!
SUSAN: Thank you.
TRACY: Up next, could your teen be texting with the Devil?

---

From theonion.com:

Susan Eckman from The National Archives comes on Today Now! to share newly discovered National Anthem verses about brutally decapitating enemies during the War of 1812.

---

From wikipedia.org:

To further invoke the atmosphere of a 24-hour network, The Onion News Network video series includes items lifted from what are ostensibly ONN news shows and continuing reports:

* Today Now!: TN is a parody of morning lifestyle and news programs such as NBC's Today show and ABC's Good Morning America. Hosted by Jim Haggerty (in actuality, former New York City TV anchor Brad Holbrook) and Tracy Gill (portrayed by Tracy Toth), the style is typical of the breezy style often found in morning network television shows, with the presenters either uncritical or completely oblivious to the subject matter presented, regardless of the absurdity of the subject (e.g., Haggerty's earnest question about whether or not an omelet recipe strictly requires a metal shoe-horn to measure the butter into the pan).

Case Study No. 0101: Spike, Phil, Harold, & Susan

The Librarian Dialogues
3:11
A short comical satire about a group of librarians that take their job very serious.

www.fatkidstudios.com/ librariandialouges
Tags: short librarian dialogue library comedy odd satire strange silly interesting apple books dvds bvds cds breathe mint approaching midnight extras fail win ftw ftl epic loss inches funny film haha trailer fps
Added: 5 years ago
From: f4tk1dx
Views: 21,049

We cordially present
A film by Sam Logan Khalgehi

Featuring Jeff Stetson, A.E. "Al" Kowalski, Darryl Maharidge, and Elizabeth Ladd Lee as the librarians

The Librarian Dialogues

[scene opens with the four librarians sitting around a meeting table inside the library]
PHIL: Listen, I would like to discuss a certain matter of the more or less "unpatronage" of our patrons!
HAROLD: What're you talking about, Phil?
PHIL: I am talking about the theft of some of our more precious CDs, Harold! I've noticed many films have disappeared, even with the metal security strips!
SPIKE: It's these teenagers who are loitering on my premises ... like it's some sort of video store. This isn't a video store, it's a library! What do we need BVDs for, anyway?
PHIL: The Friends of the Library believe that is what gets the people in here in the first place. Why, books aren't even exciting anymore!
SUSAN: I would like to talk about the beeping of the checkout machine. Some are saying it's way too loud. Some people can't hear ...
SPIKE: Susan, we need to move the trash bins closer to the front entrance.
[cut to a flashback of Spike walking towards the front entrance of the library before stopping at the trash bin]
SPIKE: [in voice over] I came in early a couple of days ago, and I found a half-eaten hot sausage ...
[cut back to Spike holding two fingers apart to simulate the distance]
SPIKE: Ten inches from a receptacle. We need to entice our customers to use the white trash receptacles. It's not that hard.
SUSAN: Why don't we give them ten free CDs?
PHIL: The CDs are free, Susan!
SUSAN: Oh ...
HAROLD: They're called DVDs! And can we please talk about a more important subject?
PHIL: [folds his arms] What's that, Harold?
SUSAN: [shouting] Like the beeping of the checkout machine!
PHIL: [puts something down on the table in front of her] Breath mint, Susan?
SUSAN: [slaps the breath mint off the table]

Filmed entirely in West Bloomfield, Michigan (West Bloomfield Public Library)

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From fatkidstudios.com:

Written, Directed, Produced By
SAM LOGAN KHALEGHI

Cinematography By
JASON WAUGH
JOE GALL

Art Directed By
SAM LOGAN KHALEGHI

Set Assistant Director
ANDY SHARPLES

Key Miscellaneous Crew
D.B. DICKERSON

Key Production Assistant
KRISHNA DAVE

Production Assistants
GABE FLORES
FRANK VILLA

Editing By
ANDREW LEE HENDREN

Additional Editing By
MATT WRIGHT

Music By
WILL CLARK

Librarian #1 / Spike
JEFFRY STETSON
Librarian #2 / Phil
A.E. 'AL' KOWALSKI
Librarian #3 / Harold
DARRYL MAHARIDGE
Librarian #4 / Susan
ELIZABETH LADD LEE